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The Romantic Challenges Of Being An Empath
I frequently do readings for clients who are discovering their empathic abilities, as well as awakened empaths who are still working on their self-empowerment. The majority of empaths that I have worked with over the years have all been in very high-stress romantic situations that do nothing but magnify what these highly sensitive people are already experiencing. While this is no doubt confusing, frightening and intense for the empath, one must consider the fact that it also greatly impacts their partners.
An empath a highly sensitive person who is very aware of the feelings, moods and motivations of other people and are deeply affected by the energies around them. This is experienced by the empath in many ways, including as physical sensations, moods, and emotions, as well as an inner knowing of what lies beneath the surface of other people’s words and actions. An empath has the ‘psychic radar’ to hone in intuitively on the truth of a person or situation.
Relationships, especially romantic ones, can therefore be a nightmare for empaths, and their partners. While their partner may be saying one thing, the empath ‘knows’ or ‘feels’ something different, and can sense if their partner is being dishonest or deceitful. While this can be useful at times to protect the empath from pursuing relationships with the wrong kind of person, it can also be very damaging and destructive to a potentially happy, healthy relationship with loving partner.
It can be very disconcerting and intimidating for the romantic partner of an empath to feel so constantly questioned, judged and exposed. I get many calls from empaths who are deep in an argument stemming from their partner’s refusal to come clean about what is really going on, or what they are truly feeling. The more the partner protests, the more the empath pushes and prods, leading the partner to shut down, withdraw, or disconnect completely.
A Cheater Is Never ‘The One’
I have been doing love and relationship readings for over 30 years now…and one thing I have learned is that staying in a toxic, soul-crushing relationship with a partner who is cheating never ends well.
I am clairvoyant and therefore able to remote view the lives of my clients. I can see, for example, if there are other women around someone’s husband or boyfriend.
Sadly, whenever this kind of information comes up in a reading, I find some clients refuse to accept the truth of their situation. They are often in denial and believe that their unfaithful partner or spouse will change his ways.
In readings, I also analyze the couple’s astrological compatibility and their romance and marriage aspects – which oftentimes further indicates their partner came into this incarnation with a predisposition for infidelity, polygamy, sex addiction, and so on.
As a seasoned love psychic, I can assure you the best thing most people in such a relationship can do for themselves is to get out of it! Never settle for less than you deserve in a relationship. If you are currently doing that, reflect on your self-worth. Self-respect is impossible without self-love.
Indeed, no relationship is perfect, and it always requires commitment, dedication, hard work, compromise and at times even some personal sacrifice. But this should never include being okay with infidelity and dishonesty. Cheating should be a dealbreaker, no matter what.
What Were You Thinking!
Looking back on your life, I’m sure you, like myself, have often questioned certain people you hung out with and wondered why you wasted so much time dating or hanging out with them; or you wonder why you told that certain person something very private, which later came back to bite you, because you discovered that your confidante was a back-stabber. They key after you learn such a life lesson, is not to repeat it. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.
The good news is that there is enlightenment to be had and reaped from ill decisions made in the past. You don’t have to keep rehashing it over and over in your head; you can say: “What was I thinking?” Be glad you have learned from it, because now you are free from to move forward.
So many people are not shifting forward, because they keep tripping up over bad choices from the past. For example, they may feel that they cannot date a certain type of person, because they had a bad experience dating someone like that in the past and now they don’t want to give love a chance. I believe love always hurts one way or another – whether it’s a healthy relationship or a bad romance. It’s all about learning how much of yourself to give.
I have heard so many say, “I wish I had the self-esteem I have now back then. I was young and I had the body, and I was in better shape.” Don’t have regrets. Be thankful you finally learned to love yourself enough to not worry about what you do, or don’t have now.
Enlightenment and self-knowledge comes with age, but some never pick up on what life lessons had been laid down for them. They keep repeating the same mistakes, and hence have to come back and do it all over in another lifetime.
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
Eye Gazing As A Spiritual Practice
Eye gazing is a powerful, ancient practice in which two people engage in a shared meditation practice during which eye contact is maintained for an extended period of time. Eye gazing is usually done for about ten minutes at a time, although it can certainly be any duration preferred.
Eye gazing can be used to access past life information, promote healing, connect to your higher self, guides, or angels, and almost anything else you can imagine. The eyes are the windows to our soul, and our soul is the singularity that connects us to everything else: the Universe, Source, God, the Divine. Eye gazing is also a profound manifesting tool we can use to further develop our ‘spiritual muscles,’ so to speak.
Before you include eye gazing in your spiritual practice, I recommend you read my previous blog on the essentials of eye gazing. Once you are more familiar with the basics, you can also apply the following guidelines to your eye gazing practice.
To use eye gazing for a specific purpose, you must set a clear intention beforehand, and then hold that intention throughout the gaze. You hold an intention by simply keeping a gentle awareness in the back of your mind that what you are seeing during the gaze is relevant to your intention, and trusting that whatever comes forward is always relevant.
It’s important not to simultaneously hold any expectations about what you’re going to see, or to resist anything that comes up spontaneously, just because you don’t immediately see its relevance or connection to your intention. Keep an open mind and be flexible and accepting in the flow of your gazing experience.
If you’re gazing alone, sit comfortably in front of a mirror, take a few centering breaths, and then state your intention out loud. I prefer to speak aloud in my spiritual practice whenever possible, as words are energy forms and therefore add a ‘weight’ to our prayer requests, intentions, and affirmations. State your intention out loud and ask Spirit to provide insight around this intention. Use language that feels right for you.
Dating A Married Man
The subject of dating married men and being ‘the other women’ is something that for obvious reasons is seldom talked about. But I feel it might be healthy and necessary to discuss this more openly, as it is a much more complex issue than is often realized.
For example, many women who become involved with married men do not always know initially that he is married. In my experience, helping many female clients over the years in this predicament, many woman get into it by default after being misled by the man, only to find out later that he is married and has no plan of ever leaving his wife.
I could write a book on all the reasons why married men do not leave their wives. But instead, I think it is more important to focus on why so many women continue these affairs, once they find out he is married.
Now, you would think the empowered, modern woman of today would not put up with such a situation, but they do. I find these women are often so much in love and hopeful for what might be someday, that they convince themselves their situation is unique or different, and that he is unique or different. The truth is usually quite the opposite.
How to break free from this dead-end situationship? It can be challenging for sure, but certainly possible. I believe the key is self-love and self-worth. It requires the courage to step forward and say, “I deserve more.’
If you are caught up in a relationship with a married man, know that is seldom ends well for any of the parties involved. The chances that the outcome of your situation will be the exception to the rule is most unlikely. Stay true to your highest good and make the necessary changes for your future happiness.
Are You Married To A Cheater?
Are you married to a man who you think might be a cheater? It is more common than one might think. The bulk of my calls are about just this question: is he cheating?
Usually, if a client is asking this question, they already know the answer. They simply need either confirmation, or clarification. Their intuition is telling them something is going on. Often there are also many clues.
However, many callers still do not want to believe it is true, when I see that their partner is indeed being unfaithful to them. Some continue to ignore the signs and live in denial it until everything eventually comes to a head and they finally have to face it.
What to do if you think your husband is cheating? Question him by being open, direct and honest. Get the answers you need.tru
If he is not forthcoming, find other ways to uncover the truth and piece things together. Get a psychic reading. Hire a private detective. Check his credit card statements and chat messages. You have a right to know the truth
If you find out that he has been cheating, then seek counselling first, before making any major decisions or drastic changes. First find out exactly what kind of situation you are in and if and how it can be fixed, or not.
Getting to the core and extent of the problem in a sensible, calm manner is usually the best first step. Don’t allow his bad choices to turn your entire life upside down.
I remember a client who gave everything to her marriage, while her husband was cheating. She was suspicious, but never followed her gut. It all came crashing down when he arrived home one day and dropped the bomb that the other woman he was having an affair with was now pregnant with his child. This was an unbearable shock, as my client was unable to have children.