suffering
Your Spirit Guides Will Never Lead You Astray
“My guides must hate me! Why else would they lead me to things that cause me so much pain?” someone once said during a reading. “And where is my guardian angel when I need him?”
It was not the first time I’ve heard such sentiments from a distressed client. This kind of disappointment and frustration is not uncommon because it cuts to the heart of spiritual seeking.
It is certainly a valid concern. If angels, guides, and ancestors are meant to guide, support, and protect us, then why do they sometimes lead us to pain, heartache, and even trauma? Do they really have our backs, or are they inflicting suffering upon us for some strange reason?
I confess that there was a time in my own life when I also asked these kinds of questions.
But after years of working as a professional psychic and energy healer, as well as through my own spiritual growth journey, I’ve since come to a comforting conclusion. Our spirit helpers always operate from a place of divine wisdom, unconditional love and compassionate support.
Then why, you may ask, do bad things sometimes happen to good people? It’s simple, really. Any detour from our highest good does not occur because spirit somehow miscalculated, neglected, or misrepresented anything.
When we encounter trouble, it is usually our own doing, or something we co-created with others. Whatever the reason or cause, we alone are always the common denominator.
Below are a few examples of such self-inflicted calamities that I have repeatedly come across in my work, as well as how they differ from actual spirit guidance and divine intervention.
Honoring Yourself In Difficult Family Relationships
Family dynamics can be tremendously complex for many of us. These relationships are multilayered and deeply ingrained, often playing out across generations.
Many of my clients seek psychic insight about family matters. After matters of love and romance, and then business or career, family is often the most emotionally charged subject.
In readings, especially with empaths, intuitives, and highly sensitive individuals, I hear countless stories of family pain. Many carry a sense of never belonging, of being misunderstood or scapegoated.
These emotional burdens are often the heaviest that people bear because they are tied to the people they loved first and still love, despite the hurt.
When control or finances are interwoven into the family structure, the complexity of these relationships multiplies.
For many, family represents a love-hate relationship or a deep bond that carries deep wounds. While we cannot choose our family, we do have a say in how we interact with them, how we respond, and whether we continue to engage.
Severing family ties is a significant and often heartbreaking decision that is never taken lightly. By the time someone considers taking this step, the drama or emotional abuse has often been ongoing for decades and is sometimes rooted in a vividly painful childhood.
Embracing The Shadow Within
When I first began to intentionally and consciously walk a spiritual path, I remember doing so because it just felt so right. Every step I took toward ‘enlightenment’ in this lifetime seemed to bring more brightness into my life, and so many more blessings.
In those early days I was really rolling! I was expecting this to be an easy ride – all joy and light and love. It was wonderful.
What I hadn’t expected was the inevitable emergence of my shadow through as a result of all my spiritual work. And it was not something I was going to be comfortable with – admitting I had places of darkness within me, unloved aspects of myself, disowned pieces of my soul which had been abandoned and in such pain.
Through a series of, what seemed like, unfortunate events, I was given opportunities to face my shadow side. Challenges in relationships with friends and loved ones arose. I couldn’t understand it at first, and felt very alone and misunderstood. I was shifting the blame for this onto the people around me, instead of going inward.
Going inward, into the light, was totally okay, but going inward into the darkness was terrifying. My ego-self raised every defense to keep me from going there. Eventually, I could avoid it no longer.
My life at this point had endured tremendous change in the course of only a few years- so much so, that the entire landscape of my existence and the people in it were now different. While many of the changes were positive, the magnitude of the differences between my ‘old life’ and my ‘new life’ forced me into robust self-reflection.
The Touching Tale Of The Praying Hands
In the fifteenth century, in a tiny village near Nuremberg, Germany, lived a family with 18 children. Yes, eighteen! To put food on the table for this mob, the father and head of the household, a goldsmith by trade, worked nearly 18 hours a day at his trade, as well as any other paying job he could find in the neighborhood.
Despite their seemingly hopeless situation, Albrecht and Albert, two of the older children, had a dream. They both wanted to pursue their talent for art, but they were well aware that their father would never be financially able to send either of them to an art academy.
After many long discussions at night in their crowded bed, the two boys finally worked out a pact. They would toss a coin. The loser would go down to the nearby mines and use his earnings to support his brother, who would attend the academy.
Then, after four years, when the brother who won the coin toss finished his studies, he in turn would support the mining brother to also attend the academy – either by selling his artwork or, if necessary, by working in the mines.
They tossed a coin one Sunday morning. Albrecht Dürer won the toss and went to Nuremberg to study art. Albert went down into the dangerous mines and spent the next four years financing his brother, whose creative work at the academy was almost immediately a sensation.
Albrecht’s etchings, woodcuts, and oils were far superior to those of most of his fellow students and even his professors, and by the time he graduated he was beginning to earn substantial fees for his commissioned works.
Find Your Peace In The Present Moment
A theme that comes up frequently in psychic readings is how people inadvertently choose to live in the past, finding comfort in nostalgia or reliving painful memories that keep them tied to an earlier time. The past is often romanticized — a seemingly simpler, happier place, free from the burdens of the present.
For those who had a happy and idyllic childhood, the past may seem like a golden era. They fondly recall carefree days filled with laughter, unconditional love, and the security of knowing that someone else was responsible for making the big decisions.
These people long for the innocence of childhood, the guidance of loving parents, the support of trusted mentors, and simpler times. It can be a source of comfort, but it can also prevent them from fully embracing the possibilities of the present.
For others, the past is a dark and painful landscape filled with trauma, regret, or missed opportunities.
Some people carry deep emotional wounds from their past. Perhaps they grew up in an environment of neglect, conflict, or abuse. Instead of a safe and nurturing childhood, they experienced hardship, pain, or betrayal.
Bad memories, deeply etched in the soul, can feel like an unshakable burden. Those who have suffered often relive their trauma, carrying resentment and anger toward those who wronged them. For these people, the past is not a place of comfort, but a source of suffering that continues to affect their daily lives. Continue reading
Did Your Soul Choose Your Life Challenges?
“Oh, why do I have such terrible karma?” or “Why does the universe keep throwing me curveballs?” or “Is God punishing me?” These are questions that clients often ask me when they face struggles in life.
Spirit has repeatedly shown me in many readings over the years that we all have a kind of “architect’s plan” that we design before we incarnate into this life. This soul plan for our life journey lays out the lessons we’re going to learn and the experiences we’re going to have.
This spiritual principle is known by various names (depending on the context or belief system), including our spiritual blueprint, life design, divine plan, life script, soul contract, predestined path, and so on.
I prefer “architect’s plan” because it reminds me of the careful, meticulous planning an architect does when designing a new structure, long before the practical, hands-on construction takes place on site.
Like architects, we calmly and clearly create a plan for our life journey before we incarnate. It is only when we are here in the physical world to embody our plan that we fully experience the intensity and the many dangers and pitfalls that are part of our chosen journey, including all the fear, love, pain, hardship, joy, suffering, and everything in between.
Yes, it is hard to believe that we actually choose to face challenges and difficulties in our lives. But various spiritual traditions and esoteric philosophies tell us that our soul’s path is predestined or planned before we’re born, or at least that we have certain free will choices and options along the way.