suffering
It Just Happened
Too often people justify their poor judgment and bad choices with feeble excuses like, “It just happened.” But we all know that this is seldom the truth. The reality is that every step in our life is a choice. Whether we step forward, sideways, backwards, or stand still, it is a choice. And we should take personal responsibility for our life choices.
In everyday life we do not think much about where our steps may be leading us. We are typically just walking automatically in some direction. Many people simply live by trial and error.
However, when things go bad for us, it is usually because we have subconsciously, or even consciously, made the choice to move in a certain direction – a direction that we intuitively knew was not serving our highest good. And sadly, many times these bad choices also severely affect others.
For example, a friend of mine, who has only been married for one year, currently remains geographically separated from her husband, until she gets her immigration paperwork to be able to join him legally in his country. They had a beautiful wedding, and made the usual promises: to love and cherish, be faithful, in sickness and health, until death do them part.
Despite their long-distance marriage, they were doing everything right during the waiting period – or so it seemed. They called each other daily on the phone, and also talked on video chat. They constantly texted loving messages. He was originally also able to come and visit her here in Canada, but she could not cross the border to see him. However, when the Covid-19 pandemic hit, he was also denied entry. They had no further choice but to wait it out.
Spiritual Living Still Requires Sustainable Action
As a spiritual counselor to many with the gift of intuition, my goal is to connect with the unseen to inspire others to live in the world that I know is still possible, where avoidable suffering and tragedy are events of the past, and where each of us can live our best lives ever.
A dear friend recently contacted me from beautiful California, where multiple wildfires, fueled by the annual Santa Ana winds, have been raging throughout the state. I asked how she was faring during the season of high winds and smoke, and her reply was that life was normal as usual and that nothing out of the ordinary was occurring.
Having lived through wildfires, earthquakes, storms, and other extreme events of nature, I was taken aback that my friend seemed unshaken by the present threats. But then I remembered the refrain that my dear mother often repeated, “This too shall pass.” This was often coupled with another reminder that prayer, or positive thoughts, also require a corresponding, uplifting action.
Before my conversation with my friend ended, I carefully coached her to always be ready to protect herself and her family in the face of developments that were beyond her realm of control – especially from that deep spiritual center she draws her life’s energy and direction.
Spiritually speaking, we all have the right to be safe in the presence natural events, or unexpected crisis that may arise in our worlds. But living a life guided by Spirit also requires that we do our part to protect ourselves. This protection might take the form of creating a financial nest egg to keep afloat in the event there is a major change with employment, for example. Our personal responsibility might also manifest as shoring up one’s pantry with food and water in event a grocery supply is hampered.
There Is Nothing To ‘Fix’
If we can appreciate that everything in the Universe is composed of, and moved by energy, we would also have to concur that this magnanimous mysterious energy vibrates.
If this vibration determines how the state of matter’s density and frequency is measured and monitored, we must also conclude that like sound, the occurrence of its regularity in various designated patterns (as with elements) institute reliability in the state of transferred chaos. It is through the exchange of energy (attraction, cohesion and repulsion) that life is established and maintained. In other words balance is arbitrarily formed by the opposite action undertaken.
Now, after having said all of that, in the entire elementary, short, diffused chemistry or physics lesson…what is my point? My point is that in the midst of our seemingly chaotic lives, we are living very much in balance, but we refuse to accept it. We spend most of our precious life time seeking to find something we already are in possession of.
We are vibrating to and through the essential experiences including all of the circumstances, people, places, things and so-called problems necessary for us to exist. We are not ‘out of line,’ or out of order, or out of chances. We won’t be still enough to completely feel the fragility of our inherent unconquerable strength.
We are always on the lookout for something (a career, relationship, lover, friends, family, involvement) that is better, newer, shinier, emotionally less complicated, faster to bring desired results, easier, more beneficial, productive, financially rewarding, gratifying, and certainly less stressful. Continue reading
What To Believe When You Come Undone
So much of the typical human belief system is actually in direct opposition to the concepts of spiritual law. Let’s take the idiom “Life is too short,” for example. This saying is used to essentially suggest or convince oneself or another that we don’t live long…so just live for the now and just do what’s desirable regardless of the consequences. Well, wrong!
The soul’s journey is quite a long one. We reincarnate through many centuries of lifetimes, until our souls have completely evolved, returning to each new life with lessons to learn based on beliefs, karma and decisions made in our prior lives.
For example, a slave master born might return in his next life as a slave, to face his karma and endure what it’s like to be treated as such, and ultimately understand why it’s wrong. So, in reality, life is ‘too long.’ Every action has a reaction – an energetic effect. Thus, we need to be cognizant and conscientious of all that we say and do in this life, and not just engage or divulge in whatever we please, because of a physically limited life span.
That same theory of misunderstandings and contradictions between spiritual concepts and human beliefs, more detrimentally applies to life struggles and emotional well-being. How many times have you prematurely mourned a relationship…then wound up reuniting with your partner? Or maybe you lost your favorite job and felt hopelessly valueless and depleted, foreseeing eternal darkness, only to find your dream job shortly after? Moments, days, weeks, months, years, where you either take on a defeatist attitude, and suffer, or become a control freak and try to take matters into your own hands. Thinking you are, but not trusting that you are not, the wizard behind the curtain?
We Are All Worthy Of Forgiveness
Sometimes my brokenhearted clients ask when the person they love will also hurt the way they have been hurt by them. They have been wounded, sometimes very deeply, and they so desperately want to know that the one who hurt them will also suffer in the end. Preferably, a lot!
They desire retribution for all the pain, suffering and deceit they have suffered due this person. There has to be some kind of justice. Isn’t there some form of karma, they will ask pleadingly.
Some spiritual teachings and belief systems suggest that our most emotionally challenging experiences in this lifetime occur as a result of life lessons we have agreed upon with other souls, before being born into this particular lifetime. This concept is known as our life plan, soul agreement or soul contract, among other.
These challenges can present themselves as blockages and patterns, that we aspire to finally recognize on a soul level and then to rise above – too often after repeating the same lessons many times over during this lifetime and others.
Yes, it makes sense to me that there is a profound lesson in harsh, life-changing experiences, but it’s not so easy to see it that way, and to believe it could be something we would have agreed to, especially when we hurt so badly now.
Escaping Karma
Karma is often one of the most misunderstood spiritual experiences that we have as humans. People will often use the word ‘karma’ to represent something punitive, or to point out that another person will “get what’s coming to them.”
But looking at karma through the lens of retribution is almost the opposite of the reason why karma actually exists. In fact, when we hold a perspective about karma that is punitive, we tend to create some sticky karma for ourselves in the process.
Karma is in truth an expression of the self-correcting Universe, reflecting its intelligent, loving design. The goal of karma is to expand a person’s awareness of love, joy, and serenity. Karma simply means that whatever we give out, comes back to us multiplied.
The concept of “karma is going to get that person,” is often directly associated with personal vendetta. Therefore, so many spiritual teachers throughout history talked about forgiveness and loving our enemies. When we focus on karma “getting” the other person, we tend to bring about harsh justice for ourselves.
It is also important to understand that the karma that other people experience is not proportional to how offended we are. The goal of karma is not to ‘make’ other people feel the way that we felt when we were offended.
Healing The Pain Of Losing Your Beloved
Understanding the true nature of our soul journey, how does one cope with the pain of physical separation when our loved ones leave the physical form? There is no easy way to cope with the grief of separation from a beloved. It opens the water ways of deep emotion that rise and fall like the waves on the sea.
Even in the super-excellent times of Radha and Krishna, the supreme divine feminine and masculine described in the ancient spiritual texts of Srimad-Bhagavatam, waves of love in separation were displayed and described to the ultimate pure degree. These transcendental writings identifies the eternal realm of divine love as the original clear source of all that we experience here in a dimly reflected form, including the pain of being parted from the physical presence of a dear soulmate.
So, what can we learn from this source that we can mirror in undergoing this heart aching distress in our own lives?
The first lesson we can take away from the transcendental example is that pain in separation is a gift of love. It arises in direct proportion to the depth of the soul-to-soul connection shared between two people. Thus, every pang, however painful, is like an ornament decorating the heart with the truth of that blessed union. It embodies a reminder not only of the person, but of the great treasure we were fortunate to hold in our arms…and still in our hearts. It invites us to feel grateful for the rare opportunity we had received to experience such deep love in this world. Continue reading