inner voice
Learning To Check In With Spirit
It is likely you have a friend, co-worker or relative that is in an unhealthy or even abusive relationship. We all know people who are kind, sweet, giving, and thoughtful, who become involved with emotionally absent, dysfunctional, abusive partners.
I know someone who is currently in such a situation. Her loving nature and generosity far exceeds anything I have ever experienced in another person, and I count myself exceptionally lucky to have her as my friend.
We have known each other for many years, but have only recently developed a much closer relationship, because we have both experienced a deep loss in recent years. Grief and bereavement becomes somewhat more tolerable if one has a close friendship in which you can safely express and share your sorrow.
Judging by my friend’s gentle, kind nature one might expect she would be with a life partner who has similar traits and appreciates her, but shockingly she is in one of the most toxic relationships I have ever encountered. She is not being physically assaulted, but she is subjected to unbearable verbal and emotional abuse.
It has been going on for a very long time. I continue to offer her my unconditional love and support but feel at a loss beyond that. I have asked her why she is still in that situation with so very little to indicate there will ever be any miraculous changes? But she has always evaded these questions.
Recently, she finally confessed her reason for staying with him: she is worried about what people might think and say if she leaves him! I asked her what people? She replied, her friends and family. They might find fault with her for breaking up the family.
The Healing Power Of Positive Self-Talk
Most people indulge more in negative self-talk, than positive. But self-talk is not supposed to be negative and overly critical. We are supposed to use it to encourage, empower and motivate ourselves to achieve success and follow our dreams.
Our brain has the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and what is known in hypnosis as the critical factor of mind. This critical factor is that part of our consciousness that checks and filters every through and idea that enters our mind. It is like the gatekeeper or the guardian between the conscious mind and the subconscious. That is how hypnosis works – it is a way to bypass the critical factor so that we can access the subconscious and reprogram it with new information and insights for healing and self-empowerment.
The role of the critical factor is to protect our mind, but this is not always a good thing. Because of the job the critical mind is tasked to do, it tends to be critical of everything. It is unfortunately also that part of our brain that says we are not worthy or deserving, that we cannot do things, or achieve things.
I cannot get the job I really want.
I’m not worthy of a happy, healthy relationship.
I am not smart and pretty enough.
People just don’t like me.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
The one big problem with the critical factor is that it does not always see or hear things the way they really are. It can convince of things that are not true at all. For example, it may you that others are trying to get you fired from a job, when in fact the boss is trying to help you keep your job.
How Spirit Communicates With Us
Spirit communicates with us in many powerful ways. All we need to do to improve this beneficial and life-affirming spiritual relationship is to set an intention to expand our communication. We simply need to ask to work more closely with our ‘spirit team’ of Ancestors, Guides, and Angels.
Due to the Universal Law of Free Will, our spirit team can only communicate and intervene in our lives to the extent we request their guidance and assistance. They need our consent or mandate, because our free will affords us the right and responsibility to choose the direction and terms of our lives.
Therefore, we must ask for Spirit’s guidance and help before they can act on our behalf and increase their communication with us. Once we ask, our team can go to work on our behalf in any situation in our lives, whether it is a simple as finding a parking spot at the mall or as serious as pinpointing our life purpose, and everything in between.
The key to communicating with Spirit is to be aware of the language it uses. Spirit communicates with us both externally and internally.
External Communication
External communication comes in the forms of signs and synchronicities. Working with and looking for signs and synchronicities enables us to flow with the grace and daily magic of Spirit.
How To Find Lasting Love
Most of us want to love and be loved. Many people are looking to find the right person. But how does one find love and keep it? And what is the key to finding the right person?
Spirit says one needs to start with yourself first. Without accepting and loving yourself unconditionally, it is impossible to genuinely love someone else.
Do you love yourself enough to find love? Are you strong enough to let go of a loveless or toxic relationship? Do you know what is best for you, or are you willing to settle for a ‘just okay’ relationship…simply to be in a relationship?
In my experience, low self-esteem and a lack of self-worth does not lead to long-lasting, sincere love. Love yourself enough to leave. Loving yourself is just a matter of wanting the best for you.
Doing psychic love readings for many years, I have found that some people simply settle because they are lazy, not wanting to put in the effort. But true and lasting love is hard work. Some feel trapped in bad relationships, falsely believing they can’t get out, while others are scared to leave because they feel they cannot do any better.
Everyone deserves to be in a happy, healthy relationship. We are all deserving of love and belonging. If you are in an unfulfilled, or even an abusive relationship, you need to take decisive steps towards changing your prospects for the better. Take back your power.
Just because someone likes you does not mean you must like them. If you want to see if you really like them, and let it play out, great. Does not mean you have to like them back, much less marry them! Some people are just not the person for you. Move on, or you will never find your person.
Discovering The Power Of Intuitive Guidance
I always smile when I think back to the time I discovered the true power of intuition and the inner guidance of Spirit.
I recall that Thursday afternoon as if it were yesterday. There I was, sitting on the couch in the living room. I was totally fed up and impatiently debating whether I should go and get the evening newspaper, so that I could scour the vacancies page for any job offerings.
It was September 1978 and I was only 18 years old. Unemployment was high in the United Kingdom at the time. Sadly, I was one of those jobless young people, desperate to find work.
“Relax,” said my mind, “it’s too early to go for the evening paper now. You can get a newspaper anytime until 6pm.” ”
“You must go now,” said my heart and gut, “there may just be a job offer in the paper, and it may be exactly the kind of a job you are looking for!”
I continued with this inner battle for a while, until my heart and gut finally won, and off I went. As I stepped out onto the street, I noticed that the bus was approaching at great speed. Then saw, right in front of me a baker’s van parked outside the nearby grocers and then, to my horror, a little baby boy in a buggy outside the shop. The baby’s buggy was slowly being carried by a strong wind, taking it directly towards that oncoming bus!
My heart pounded, my mouth went dry, everyone around me gasped, and time literally felt like it was standing still. All I could think of was to run. And run I did, like an Olympic athlete. Then I pushed the buggy back onto the pavement and out of the way of the oncoming bus.
Was all this a coincidence? I think not, as I was being urged by my intuition to be in a particular place, at a specific time, to stop something potentially horrible happening. Some people whom I have told this story to have just put it down to luck. All I can say is that I am glad I listened to my heart and gut, and not my head. I do not want to imagine what might have happened, had I gone a minute later for that evening paper.
Connecting With Your Inner Wisdom
In a world rife with uncertainty and daily challenges, most of us are bound to turn to other people in our life to help us deal with our problems or regain a sense of direction. While this is perfectly normal and human to do, spirit teaches that it is best we also connect with our higher self to find the answers we are seeking.
Unfortunately, trauma and stress can significantly block the clarity of our intuition, prevent us from gaining access to our inner wisdom and divine guidance. The following strategies can help us reconnect with our inner being and build a stronger connection with our inner guidance system.
Ignore The Noise
Stop listening to the opinions and views of others. I am not suggesting that you should never take good advice, but be selective about who you choose to listen to. And if their opinion does not resonate with your inner being, walk away.
Too much external ‘noise’ can really block your instincts if you become preoccupied with what others think. There is also the fear of upsetting others or not living up to certain social norms or family expectations. If you were to give in to this, you may very well find yourself living other people’s dreams and ambitions instead of your own.
Avoid the kind of ‘well-meant’ advice that usually only serve the needs of the one advising you. Politely thank them for their interest and concern, but disregard their opinions and simply go ahead with what your inner voice advises. The Chinese Philosopher Lao Tzu said, “He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.”
Have Your Guides Led You Astray?
“My guides must hate me! They only lead me to things that cause me pain,” one of my clients recently complained. It is also not the first time I have heard something like this.
But how can this be? If our angels, guides and ancestors are here to help us, why do they lead us to things that cause us pain, heartache, or grief? Is spirit perhaps not actually guiding us, but hurting us instead? And if that is the case, what are we to do about it?
In my years of working as a professional psychic and energy healer, as well as my personal life experiences, I have come to the following conclusion on this matter. Our guides have only one mission: to love and support us unconditionally. Any deviation from our highest good is never due to the guidance of spirit, but instead the result of one or more of the following:
Ego Interference
Often, when we believe we are ‘following our guides,’ we are actually following a wounded part of our ego that continues to create a reality of pain – because that is all that we know. Your guides will never encourage you to do anything that causes you, or another person harm. Your spirit guardians will never make you feel belittled, intimidated or frightened.
Now, it is important to note they may steer you towards life choices and experiences that may make you feel somewhat uncomfortable or challenged, because it is outside of your comfort zone and they are wanting you to grow and expand. But there is a difference between being gently nudged towards personal growth and soul expansion, and simply being frightened or emotionally crushed
Lack Of Listening
The fundamental question with spirit guidance is whether are you truly listening? Sometimes we are in so much anger or pain that our guides are actually communicating with us, and guiding us, in vain, because we are unable to hear it clearly.
Explore ways to turn off the destructive self-talk and emotional intensity, and work on tapping into your inner guidance and listening to your inner voice.
For example, ask your angels, guides or ancestors to work with you in the dream state. Once the conscious mind that is hurting so much is asleep, it is much easier for our guides to come in and do their work.