self-care
Spirit Says You Can’t Please Everyone
I have learned that people-pleasing is something that one simply cannot do. People must learn to do it for themselves. We cannot please everyone all of the time, and some people will never be satisfied anyway, no matter how much time, energy and love we offer them. They are simply not ever going to be happy, no matter what. Period.
I can think of various situations where one might feel the need to coddle and people-please those we love and care for, but in the end it will only bring us self dis-ease and stress.
For example, the child who tries to please and be there and do everything for the parent. Why is this a bad idea? Well, the parent may give up if their child tries to do everything for them. Especially if they are older and trying to find themselves and re-establish their own life, after taking care of everyone else their whole life.
Sometimes we can smother an ageing parent with kindness, by trying to do too much for them. When we do this, it makes them second guess their ability to do things for themselves. It may even cause them to worry, have anxiety, or become fearful of living.
It is good to be there for one’s elderly parents, however there is a line that can be crossed if we try and do too much and make them feel like they cannot do certain things anymore. Sure, if their driver’s license has been taken from them, for example, and they cannot see well anymore, then obviously driving them places makes sense. But, if they are still able to function normally, then let them!
Are We There Yet?
Are we there yet? It’s okay to ask. The answer, however, should always be no. If we become preoccupied with destination, we lose sight of the joy and purpose of the journey in the first place. When we honor the journey, we are able to keep on the path of forward motion.
Life itself is the journey. We learn the hard lessons, and finally understand that it’s a never-ending process. Often things occur in the guise of mistakes, failures, misunderstandings, hurts. But in truth, not learning from these events is the only failure. And if you don’t learn it the first time, it is highly likely the lesson will repeat itself, over and over again, until you actually do learn it.
When our behavior and actions change, we convert what we have learned into wisdom. For some people the process is a lifelong quest, while others utilize what they have learned and it moves them along quickly. Some people need to go deeper within themselves to make progress.
It is always good to ask if we are there yet. Especially at the beginning of every journey, or when the learned lessons tell us there is more work to be done – inner work to get to the very core of our being. For some people inner work can be very frightening, as many of us deeply suppress the things that we don’t want to deal with. But to complete the journey we must peel away the layers, like peeling an onion.
My Great Grandmother’s Mysterious ‘Sugar Cookies’
My great grandmother made incredible cookies. She called them “sugar cookies,” but perhaps a more appropriate name for them might have been mysterious mystical magic cookies! Everyone loved them – youngsters like myself, as well as our family’s elders, and every age in-between.
Those cookies still bring back so many wonderful memories. They had a special aroma of freshly-baked delight that wafted all the way outside her kitchen window and down the lane beside her charming little home, where she lived with my great grandfather. As a child I couldn’t wait to get to their house, so that I could partake of those delectable sweet treats.
They were round, but not perfectly round. They had that authentic homemade look, which made them even more exquisite to my childlike enthusiasm. And, there was a rather unique spiciness among the ingredients; it was a spice that I had never tasted before in anything else. Oh, my! I especially loved the barely charred edges they usually had, as a result of leaving them in the oven a bit longer than necessary. Those crisp little edges made them all the tastier to me.
I remember sitting at her kitchen table, watching her scoop up the ingredients, one by one, and adding them to her mixing bowl. I didn’t know how much of each ingredient she was using, because she never used a measuring cup. She just knew how much to add of everything. I believe this style of instinctively cooking from scratch is practically becoming a lost art, with all the digital recipes and modern utensils we use nowadays to cook even the simplest of things. And perhaps some of the true character and originality has also been lost in many of our ancestors’ recipes.
How To Get Your Day Off To A Great Start!
Always begin your day as you intend to live your life. This is one of the basic spiritual wisdoms my mother taught me when I was a small child. Fifty years later, I realize how right she actually was! Getting your day off to a great start is important because it puts you into a positive frame of mind, and as a result activates the Law of Attraction, empowering you to manifest more positivity in your life.
Starting the day on a positive note primes you for being in problem-solving mode. It is never easy to solve problems when you are feeling negative. By putting yourself in a positive mindset, you will feel much more confident in tackling life’s challenges. And the more we address our issues, the more confident and empowered we become.
We become more comfortable to live with, and work with, if we start our days off with a higher vibration. It goes without saying, that most people prefer, both personally or professionally, to be around positive individuals. Most folks are drawn to positivity, rather than negativity.
Therefore, by putting yourself in a positive headspace every morning, your personal and professional relationships will not only get off to a good start, but will also increasingly stay in a good place, day after day. How good is that!
The above all said, just how do we go about starting our day in the best possible way? Personally, I find the following strategies to be very effective:
Let’s Make The Most Of This Gift Of Time
There is a cheesy saying, “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” It may be somewhat cheesy, but it is a brilliant metaphor. You still have those lemons. They are still terribly sour and inedible. But now you’ve added your own sweetness to them.
In recent months we have all suddenly been presented with a sometimes overwhelming new paradigm. Many of us are spending more time at home. Before the pandemic, many of us often wondered where our time went? If we only had more time!
This is especially true for those of us with young children. I have often said I feel like I only have 10-hour-days to fit everything into, including sleep, since my children were born.
It’s interesting to talk to my clients who are currently still going in to work, and often stressed for time, as compared to those clients who are fortunate to work from home, or have a reduced work schedule, or are currently unemployed. They are like parallel universes.
If you currently have the gift of time on your hands, make good use of it. It will lessen your depression and anxiety, and it will help you to think of this unusual time in our lives, which is only temporary, with more fondness and sentimentality. With the internet, so many options are open to us, and the possibilities are endless. Before all of this, I even learned how to crochet and knit online! I am now a very proud intermediate crocheter… and novice knitter.
When Tempers Flare – A Message From My Guides
These are very uncertain times. The planet has been engulfed with worry due to the rampant spread of the novel coronavirus. Some regions of the planet have been harder hit than others, and some areas have been unable to maintain a tight control over the spread of this new disease.
In addition to the illness itself, both financial and food insecurities are now affecting many more households. Businesses are being forced to close. People have lost their employment. Some positions have ceased to exist altogether. Government stimulus and rescue funds have been helpful, but in some cases, have not been received in a timely manner.
The stress on individuals and families trying to keep their heads above water has been monumental.
Meanwhile, the work demands placed on medical professionals, frontline workers and first responders have intensified at a rapid speed. For many their hours of duty have seemed endless and their personal risks and sacrifices are significant. They are being thrown into worst-case scenarios that would not have seemed imaginable only a few short months ago. They have further been hampered by the lack of supplies, and the overwhelming numbers of people infected in a relatively short period. The stress faced by these professionals has been relentless. Continue reading
Streaming With Your Angels
At the moment, our world is still seeking answers and solutions to what appears to be a never-ending stream of challenges and concerns. And some days it appears as if we are moving backwards, instead of forward! Our concerns for our homes, livelihood and loved ones are more prevalent than ever right now. We are also bearing witness to incredible acts of giving, compassion, courage, and sacrifice, that remind us who we can be – even during the most stressful of times.
Many of us are also streaming more every day. We are being inundated with massive amounts of information, that we must sort through and decide what to believe and trust, what we should or should not do, and most importantly, how we are going to be present in our rapidly changing world.
The most important consideration for all of us right now should be: what are we going to show our loved ones, colleagues, friends, about who we are choosing to be here and now, today? The beginning of each day in this challenging new world is a powerful opportunity for change and transformation.
The angels remind us that there is a difference between awareness and fear. Fear causes reaction, awareness creates discernment and wisdom. During stressful times, fear is easily triggered. Tempers flare, and arguments are sparked that are not always very easily resolved.