pain
Have Your Guides Led You Astray?
“My guides must hate me! They only lead me to things that cause me pain,” one of my clients recently complained. It is also not the first time I have heard something like this.
But how can this be? If our angels, guides and ancestors are here to help us, why do they lead us to things that cause us pain, heartache, or grief? Is spirit perhaps not actually guiding us, but hurting us instead? And if that is the case, what are we to do about it?
In my years of working as a professional psychic and energy healer, as well as my personal life experiences, I have come to the following conclusion on this matter. Our guides have only one mission: to love and support us unconditionally. Any deviation from our highest good is never due to the guidance of spirit, but instead the result of one or more of the following:
Ego Interference
Often, when we believe we are ‘following our guides,’ we are actually following a wounded part of our ego that continues to create a reality of pain – because that is all that we know. Your guides will never encourage you to do anything that causes you, or another person harm. Your spirit guardians will never make you feel belittled, intimidated or frightened.
Now, it is important to note they may steer you towards life choices and experiences that may make you feel somewhat uncomfortable or challenged, because it is outside of your comfort zone and they are wanting you to grow and expand. But there is a difference between being gently nudged towards personal growth and soul expansion, and simply being frightened or emotionally crushed
Lack Of Listening
The fundamental question with spirit guidance is whether are you truly listening? Sometimes we are in so much anger or pain that our guides are actually communicating with us, and guiding us, in vain, because we are unable to hear it clearly.
Explore ways to turn off the destructive self-talk and emotional intensity, and work on tapping into your inner guidance and listening to your inner voice.
For example, ask your angels, guides or ancestors to work with you in the dream state. Once the conscious mind that is hurting so much is asleep, it is much easier for our guides to come in and do their work.
The Divine Justice Of Karmic Lessons
We sometimes feel we have been wronged by others in some awful way, and then we wonder if the perpetrators will get their ‘come uppance’ or ‘just deserts.’ We wish to know if divine justice will be served upon them.
Sometimes we are so upset or angry that we would like to see this retribution happen immediately and right before our very eyes. In these emotional moments we are out for revenge and want to see the other person reap what they’ve sown. We believe it may bring us some peace that justice has finally been done.
As a youngster, I often heard my mother refer to it as “The Law of Return,” suggesting that whatever we put out there, both good and bad, will always come back to us. She would say that it always comes back to us tenfold!
There are also spiritual teachings and wisdom traditions that suggest if we don’t learn our lessons and correct our mistakes in this lifetime, it will become karmic in the next. It further suggests that we eventually will experience whatever harm or wrongdoing we have imposed upon others in our own life, sometimes for several lifetimes, until we’ve truly learned our lesson.
So, will others get what’s coming to them for the pain and suffering they have caused us? It’s my experience that this is rarely the case, but from evidential mediumship messages, I am convinced that a life review, when we reach the other side, is inevitable. The soul who has hurt someone else, will be held accountable and will feel what the other person felt very intensely.
I do know from spirit messages that have come through from certain relatives and family members on the other side, that they have relived what I had felt when they were harsh towards in this life. Spirit often comes through with messages of guilt, remorse and regret. The aim is usually to seek healing and forgiveness.
The Three Laws of Grace
There are three primary Laws of Grace that function under the overarching Law of Attraction. Grace is generally associated with divine support or spiritual help, but in this context it simply means that we are always free to choose again.
The Law of Love
The first Law of Grace is the Law of Love. The Law of Love does not refer to feelings, sentiments or emotions. Too often it is assumed that love is a feeling we get when we are with someone, but in metaphysics and spirituality love is not a feeling.
Instead, spiritual love is choosing to accept others as they are and to want what is best for them. What most of us know as ‘love’ today is actually ‘like,’ because to like someone or something is conditional. Real love, on the other hand, has no conditions. It is unconditional.
There is also a common belief about ‘love’ that can be very damaging to relationships. Sometimes we create emotional attachments to future events and declare that “this is love.” Yet, it is impossible to love a future other – either you love a person, or you do not.
When people conjure up extensive images and stories about a future version of another person and attach their mental and emotional attention to these things, they often create a strong sense of painful longing, which creates within them the desire to change the other person.
It is this painful yearning that is the key to understanding, because with the Law of Attraction like always attracts like. Painful longing can only ever attract more pain. It does not even matter how compatible two souls are in this life, if one of them is participating in such a painful longing, then pain will inevitably become the result of the relationship.
Love is unconditional acceptance and there is only one love. Therefore, Buddhists believe one cannot have friends and enemies. If you have enemies then eventually all of your friends will become enemies, and vice versa.
Helping Others Is A Great Way To Help Yourself
Ten years ago was a very difficult time in my life. I had a lot of time to reflect and put my own needs in perspective. My experience with that stress gave me coping skills that I want to share with you in today’s difficult times.
We all have choices in life when we believe that we have hit ‘rock bottom.’ We can choose to stay at that bottom and focus on that negative energy, or we can look for the positive side and see that there is nowhere else to go, except back up to the top.
A decade ago my mother was fighting cancer. She was strong and healthy and had always focused on a healthful and active lifestyle. Why did this happen to someone who does all the right things in life, when there are so many people that do not take care of themselves and then live a longer life?
In those days, I could choose to focus on such negative thoughts about how unfair life was, or I could choose to find the positive in that situation. Spending time with my mother, taking her to doctor’s appointments, cooking her favorite meals and offering my listening ear instead created a positive spirit for both of us.
I tried to spend as much time with her as possible, giving her time to live, love and laugh. We focused on one day at a time, but also made plans for tomorrow. Keeping busy and reminiscing over the positive memories we shared, truly helped me through that very stressful time with my mother.
On top of dealing with my mother, I also had a nine year old Doberman dog that was very close to me. He had just been diagnosed with liver disease and his prognosis was not good. The added stress of my dog’s health made matters even more challenging. I still think sometimes that if it wasn’t for bad luck, I would have no luck at all! But I make an effort to snap out of this kind of thought process as quickly as possible. It serves no purpose in the long run.
The Daily Protection Of Your Guardian Angels
Our guardian angels are always around. I have witnessed their work and protection many times throughout my adult life. Earlier tonight, I had a sobering reminder of this.
The miracle of divine intervention often is all about divine timing. If we had been a mere 60 seconds further down the road on our drive home today, we may have become another tragic statistic. Instead, we witnessed a horrific accident scene this evening that happened about a minute before we arrived on the scene!
What kept us from being the vehicle hit? What kept us back, just far enough to not be in that accident? Our guardian angels, of course! This is why I offer gratitude daily to the angels for keeping me and my family safe.
We were the first to arrive at the accident scene, and while I was calling the emergency services, I silently said a prayer for those involved. I also gave thanks to Archangel Michael for the protection he has always provided me since I started to work with him.
To process my shock I even jokingly said, “You know, Archangel Michael, sixty seconds is maybe still too close for comfort, wouldn’t you say?” The message I got in return was more serious: “Sheri, I don’t want you to be complacent and too self-satisfied in life. These moments teach appreciation and faith.”
I know my husband was also rattled by what he saw – he was the one that went to the hit vehicle. I just could not do it. However, I held him in Archangel Michael’s cloak until we were released from the scene.
As I watched the earth angels from the fire department cut the people out of their vehicle, and witnessed the kindness of the police that came to close the roads, direct the traffic and check on everyone involved in the accident, I had a sense of calm come over me. I felt a ‘knowing’ that I was there for a reason.
Walk In Faith As You Move Forward
“For we live by faith, not by sight.” I have relied on the words of this verse from 2 Corinthians for most of my life with much success, no matter how tough times have been.
What does it mean to walk in faith, and not by sight? Well, it means to keep going and to keep your faith in God, Spirit, a Higher Power, even when you are not sure of where exactly you are headed.
This past year these words could not have been more relevant. It has been very difficult for all of us, especially for those who have lost loved ones. Sadly, in our day and age, when a loved one passes, we don’t always get the support we need in order to get through the loss and get the help we need to move forward.
Processing grief on your own is no easy task. First we have to accept that our loved one is not with us in the physical sense anymore, but their soul is always with us. They will tell us that they are still here, but they do not want us to have an unhappy life, they don’t want us to be alone.
In our soul contract one of us agrees to leave before the other, whether it is a parent, husband, wife, child, sibling, whomever it may be, and that the one left behind would be experiencing what it means to endure such a loss.
As we struggle to move forward, people might say, why aren’t you feeling better yet? Time to get over it. Life goes on. Why are you still so sad? Well, it just doesn’t work that way, and anyone who has experienced such a loss understands that it takes a lot of time for the heart to truly heal.
I lost my husband of 31 years a long time ago. You don’t ever get over it completely, but it does get easier with time. It’s a step-by-step process, and having people that support you means so much to help you get through.
The What-ifs That Go Bump In The Night
When I grow up, I want to be a lightworker! Okay, so I’ve grown up and I’ve been a psychic and healer for many years. The question now is, how do I take back, or erase from my mind’s eye all that I’ve seen? ‘Wounded healer, heal thyself’ is a very old truth, which still holds merit after many years of being bandied about.
Perhaps today it is more true than ever. In today’s world we are dealing with much more fear and what-ifs than ever before in our lifetime. Someone, or something, somewhere – the news media for one – is always preying on our fears. Panic and perpetual fear is the name of the game for many in our world these days.
Psychics, astrologers, mediums, diviners, and energy healers, among other, are known by the universal term ‘lightworkers.’ This is ironic, considering we often have to delve into the darkest fears of most people head-first, in order to help our fellow humans come to some form of clarity, healing or conclusion.
And what happens when the lightworker’s battery begins to fade from overuse and not enough recharging? Can helping other people face their fears make our own fears and limiting beliefs become larger by proxy, thus causing our own light to dim?
Lightworkers are born healers and teachers. At our core we want to help everyone. We know that inner peace comes from within. However, some of our clients are open to guidance, while others are not. Maybe I only speak for myself as a healer, but those who refuse guidance often haunt me far longer than those who embrace it. They are the ones who keep me up at night. They are the ones who make me doubt and question what I know in my heart to be true, based on my ability to listen to a Higher Power and relay messages spirit wants to share.
Face your fears, I tell myself. Even as a wounded healer, I must continue to face my self-doubt and remember to look upon the bright side: the countless souls whose lives I have been blessed to change and help make into something brighter, better and more fulfilling.