solitude
Looking Within – A Message From My Guides
As the holiday season starts to ramp up around the world, everything becomes more and more hectic. Travel plans are made early. Gifts are purchased. Party invitations are extended. New outfits are bought. Menus are set. Baking is done. It is a wondrous time of year, to give thanks and to show appreciation to family, friends, neighbors and colleagues.
Under these circumstances, it is understandable that stress abounds too. For some people, in addition to all the excitement, there is a real feeling of obligation. The expectations of others can be overwhelming and, of course, it is impossible to please everyone. There is also the feeling that time is running too short to accomplish everything on the to-do list. Demands on your time can seem endless and unreasonable.
For others, the holiday season can be a very quiet and somewhat lonely time. Old memories can be triggered. Losses can become more heightened and a sense of sadness can prevail. In the Northern Hemisphere, the days get shorter and sometimes much colder, so sunlight isn’t as prevalent to perk you up and lighten your spirit.
Whether you are run off your feet or living a more solitary lifestyle, we recommend that you make some time to look within. A daily meditation habit can do wonders to give you a sense of peace, calm and gratitude. A quiet mind at the start of your day can prepare you for the remainder of each day as it unfolds. A peaceful feeling can help you to put things into perspective so as not to worry, overreact or panic unnecessarily.
Everyone has a ‘little narrator’ inside their head who is constantly chatting up a storm. If this little chatterbox was a real person sitting with you in your living room or in the car, you would eventually ask him or her to stop talking for a while so that you could think, read, watch TV, listen to music, converse, drive, and so on. However, because everyone has grown quite accustomed to this little tag-along giving constant commentary throughout the day, you carry on in spite of the continual interruptions.
Seeking Spirituality
During the years of private study with my teacher, Adyashanti, he used to speak a lot about belief systems and spiritual practices. I learned from him, among other things, that to believe something, as opposed to having a direct experience of it, are two entirely different things. If you believe something because you’ve been made to feel guilty for being a non-believer, or merely because you think it’s the ‘right’ thing to do, it’s likely that this belief will be challenged throughout your life.
However, if you have a direct experience that is of a spiritual nature, you’re more likely to remember it and the impact it had on you, and you are more likely to truly believe as a result. The direct spiritual experiences we have, whether through meditation, dreams, or psychic and paranormal phenomena, are the ones that help us grow as an individual and bring us into alignment with our soul.
Why is this? If you think about it, we are bombarded with information every day that our minds must either believe, memorize, and somehow apply. Our authentic state, soul or higher self, has a direct, intuitive knowing that doesn’t come from this information or thoughts triggered by the external world. This kind of ‘knowing’ comes from within. When we have moments where our ‘everyday mind’ is out of the way, either through a psychic vision, spiritual experience, dream, or simply a quiet, meditative state, we come back in touch with this original ‘inner knowing’ or ‘beingness.’
Some call this ‘enlightenment.’ According to my teacher, Adyashanti, and from my own direct experiences, true enlightenment is not something that can be learned, rather it’s the ‘unlearning’ of all thoughts we’ve taken in.
Embracing The Night
At night we should be able to break free from our daytime stresses. After all, we aren’t really expecting someone to send us an email or receive a phone call when we are asleep – theoretically at least.
Nevertheless, far too many of us toss and turn during the night, worrying about the day ahead and possibly making mountains out of molehills along the way. I know I have done this far too many times myself and you, dear reader, probably have done so also? However, you could gain the maximum calming effects of the late hours by considering the following:
Take A Walk
Go for a walk with your friend, just after the sun has set. You do not need to engage in any conversation and do make sure to set your phone to silent mode. Stroll, breathe deeply and take in all the sounds of the night along the way.
Doing this can induce relaxation, even in particularly stressed individuals. What do you hear? Is it frogs, crickets, some nocturnal bird, or even the noise of traffic in the distance? All of this reflects that life is still going on, and making a mental note of these sounds can be very relaxing indeed.
You could also take the opportunity to really explore the natural world at night, as the light of the silvery moon really does show us Mother Nature’s remarkable beauty at this particular time.
Do pay attention to all the smells and sounds the night time brings, take note of the lovely nocturnal animals you see. It will remind you that even on the darkest night, life has not stopped and still has so much beauty and wonder to show you.
Spiritual Healing
Healing from a serious or chronic illness may happen under different circumstances, and it some cases it can appear fully spontaneous. Behind every healing option there is a complex process which we never fully understand.
Our mindset is however an important player in how things unfold. But it is more than just having a positive attitude—it has many facets. And since the term ‘mind’ is a more modern concept, I prefer to refer to ‘spirit,’ which encompasses the mind in all its complex depth, along with emotions and sensations.
Spiritual healing can be defined in many ways, through many traditions. It seems to me useful to talk about the effect on the person, and understand it from that point of view. An experience of any kind may be a spiritual healing process, whenever a breakthrough takes place, or a release of inner pain occurs to make room for acceptance.
This might not be a painless process, otherwise it would happen much more easily, but it is a necessary step, because it allows us to abandon a repeating loop focused on pain. As an example, I can think of someone in a dysfunctional marriage, into which much work has been invested, including some counseling or therapy, but the only thing still keeping it together is the desire to ‘not fail.’
Do It Anyway
No matter what we go through in life and with who, we always come back to the same place… a familiar place of being alone. The thought occurred to me the other day that we come into this world alone, and we go out alone.
Though we may be surrounded by others, at the end of the day, we are still alone when we go to sleep at night. Even if we are married, or in a relationship with someone who sleeps next to us, we still enter into the sleep state or dream state, alone.
Have you ever noticed that people who are comfortable being alone, have somehow mastered being alone without being lonely? There is a true comfort, freedom, and delight in being by oneself, alone. When we are alone, we can take an honest inventory of our life, who we choose to spend time with, and also decide how we wish to spend our time.
The relationship arena seems to be one of the most challenging areas of life. We all fall into traps and pitfalls that can steer us away from our natural state of happiness , which we come home to when we are alone. However, relationships also seem to provide a fast track for our own personal growth by revealing how we interact with other people.
Our relationships point out areas within ourselves that may require growth or increased self-love. Simply put, relationships show us exactly where we need to focus on to come back to a state of wholeness.