News and Views From The Psychic Access Community

highly sensitive person

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Extend Yourself The Grace Of Forgiveness

click here for a free psychic reading a PsychicAccess.comIf you are an empath you may believe that forgiveness should be easy for you, or at least easier than it is for others. But I’ve spoken to many empaths and highly sensitive people over the years who all struggle with forgiveness.

One of the main issues with forgiveness for the empath is that we feel another’s emotions intensely, literally as our own. This muddies the waters considerably, because it tends to blur boundaries. Blurred boundaries can often lead to a closed mouth for an empath. Why? Because it is difficult for us, especially in childhood or in romantic relationships, to know where we end and another begins.

It is easy for others to manipulate appropriate boundaries with an empath, or to erase them altogether. All the empath knows is that there is pain, sadness, a sense of frustration, or anger.  If you are an empath, then the question becomes are you angry with them, or yourself? Should you have been able to foresee the catastrophe happening, the relationship ending, job imploding, and so on. This leads to self-doubt and the rehashing of incidents that occurred years ago…with no resolution.

In the meantime, every time an empath thinks about the situation, past or present, we feel it…and the cycle continues.

Yes, you are empathic, intuitive, even psychic, but that does not make you immune to being human, neither does it make you all-knowing or all-seeing, especially when it comes to your own life, childhood or relationships.

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Changing Your Think-Feel-Act Cycle

click here for a free psychic reading a PsychicAccess.comThere is a popular saying, “Where attention goes, energy flows.” And since everything is energy, we often forget how true this is and how it plays out in our lives. We can be stuck in the same groove without noticing it. And then we think, where has time gone, and maybe it’s too late to change?

The good news is, as long as we are still breathing, it’s never too late to change and choose differently to create a different outcome.

All things in the Universe is energy vibrating at various frequencies, and so does our thoughts. This is highly relevant in the think-feel-act cycle of our mind-body connection. Our thoughts have an effect on our feelings, and then our actions, which ultimately produce outcome in our lives.

Our thoughts and feelings can even affect our body and physical health, as well as how a situation will play out in our relationships, finances, daily habits and lifestyle choices.

In relationships, it’s important to look at how we view ourselves first, as it has a direct relationship on how others will react to us. How we think, feel and act can make a big difference in relationship outcomes with friends, lovers, co-workers and family.

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Shenpa Is Not About Getting ‘Called Out’

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comA true teacher offers you a path to extraordinary personal expansion, because she has no investment in praising you in your mediocrity or dysfunction, in order to help you falsely ‘feel good,’ so you will keep coming back for more. But many people find it hard, threatening, or embarrassing, to practice shenpa, even if it is coming from a teacher that loves them enough to be sometimes more committed to their advancement than they are themselves.

Shenpa is a form of mindfulness, applied to you, so you can basically call it ‘mindful self-awareness.’  It is originally a concept in Tibetan Buddhism, meaning ‘attachment’ or a place where we become ‘hooked’ or ‘stuck.’ Pema Chödrön describes shenpa as “the urge, the hook, that triggers our habitual tendency to close down. We get hooked in that moment of tightening when we reach for relief. To get unhooked, we begin by recognizing that moment of unease and learn to relax in that moment.”

In this age of ‘victim worship,’ most people have been taught and rewarded for being or praising victims, no matter what. This approach infers that the victim is a deformed, delicate, broken porcelain object that must be treated with soft gloves. The victim is considered to be so emotionally and mentally deranged that you must coddle them, because deep down inside you don’t believe they have the resources in their own Self to recover, to grow, to self-validate.

This ultimately is a putdown… not a vote of confidence. This gives the message to the victim that they are ruined for life and therefore you will tolerate any behavior from them. This gives the subliminal message that you feel sorry for them, do not expect much, if anything from them, and also do not ultimately believe they will ever recover. They are, in your mind, and how you treat them, damaged for life. But actually they are not. Getting a scar is not brain damage! Continue reading

Restoring My Energy Balance In A New Way

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comRecently, a major storm caused some damage to our home. This required us to have contractors invade our normally very peaceful, secluded home. The repairs were such that it required the workers to have access to both the exterior and interior of our home.

Although we were both grateful for the fact that we have great home owners insurance, and that all the repairs were going to be completed with minimal expense on our part, we also were faced with the reality that our life as we knew it was going to be temporarily disrupted.

We had numerous people in and out of our home. Activity was everywhere in the house, and although our home is large there was not one room that did not require some kind of repair. This meant I had no private space to myself anymore. I had nowhere to escape to and clear my energy.

Reminding myself that it was only temporary, and that I could handle the lack of privacy I had become so accustomed to, I tried to adapt. I started doing my mediation early in the morning, before the workers arrived, and I routinely smudged the entire home with sage. I also started spending less time at home, as to not be in anyone’s way.

All the while I tried to convince myself that I was fine. I was also doing the energy work I needed to do to ensure none of the energy that was brought into my home by so many strangers would leave an imprint or attach itself to me. But about a month into this three month ordeal, I found myself getting very depressed. Continue reading

Self-Care Is Not Selfish

click for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comEmpaths are givers first and foremost. Loyal, sometimes to a fault, and fiercely protective of those they care about… moving at lightning speed whenever called upon.

So, when I say to an empath that it may be time to put themselves first, the response is often mixed. But, if putting yourself first seems too selfish or too difficult, try something simpler: at least put yourself on an equal footing with those you love and care for.

For many sensitive and highly intuitive people, self-care must be an acquired behavior… and it’s a big one. Empaths intend to be selfless, to help, heal and facilitate those they care about. Wonderful! But remember, if this is your goal, then begin with yourself. The stronger, healthier and happier you are then the more effective, nurturing and supportive you can be to those around you.

Putting yourself first doesn’t mean that you are doing only what you want to do all the time, and it doesn’t mean that you are suddenly going to ignore those you care about. What it does mean is making it a priority to take care of your own physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. This can be a tall order and quite the task for some empaths. Don’t wait until you are in a meltdown… frustrated  and snapping at everything and everyone around you, with little or no provocation.

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Humor – A Message From My Guides

Click for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comWe encourage everyone to remember the expression, “Laughter is the best medicine.”

Gossip and rumors abound. People overreact to perceived slights and unintended insults. Hair-trigger tempers flare and social media platforms expose issues for all to see. Friends interject their opinions without all the facts. Disagreements become exacerbated in the resulting spotlight. Politics can be polarizing. Stress levels are through the roof. Road rage is no longer an isolated incident. You can feel surrounded by potential conversational landmines.

At times like this, it is important to step back, take a breath and take a break. Come back to the issue with fresh eyes and determine whether it is truly worthy of consideration and comment, or whether it is a tempest in a teapot that will pass on its own. If necessary, deal with the issue using logic and forethought, rather than high emotion.

In times of stress, seeing the lighthearted side of anything can seem difficult, if not altogether impossible. However, there are some ways that you can soften the impact.

If you can come to terms with the idea of worrying only about those things you can really control and take the necessary action to control them, it will make it much easier to compartmentalize and to choose where to focus your thoughts and resources.

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Choosing The Path Of The Spiritual Warrior

Click for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comWe live in a time of extreme sensitivity, liability, victimhood and ultimate political correctness. Say the wrong words, use the wrong tone, do the ‘wrong thing,’ and you may be instantly branded as a predator, abuser, at the very least mean, or even legal action material. Sigh. How do we get authentic feedback in such a culture? How can anyone truly learn and grow when so many teachers, supervisors, leaders and mentors are all walking on eggshells?

In this respect I consider myself quite lucky. I have had ample access to honest feedback for growth and healthy arguing (discussions with passion). And people who care enough to speak up have always been a part of my life.

The culture I grew up in was one that expected people to speak up, have opinions, and care about what they were talking about. We were expected to research our point of view, present it, learn from others, teach others, be willing to disagree, sometimes agree to disagree, and still love, hug and stay loyal to each other.

As an activist in the peace and social justice movement, I learned to participate in critical self-assessment groups on a regular basis, with the aim of helping each other stay on track, stay mindful, be challenged to grow, and become bigger and better on the path to freedom.

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