spouse
Being Your Strongest, Most Authentic Self
Many people tend to think that being vulnerable and open is a bad thing, because it makes them vulnerable to getting hurt in life and especially in relationships.
When someone disappoints or hurts us, whether deliberately or inadvertently, it is usually because they have deep wounds of their own that stems from their past, especially for their childhood. These unresolved traumas are often dormant and unconscious.
One might feel this is still no excuse to treat others poorly, or that they should know better. However, because these people typically have not done much inner work or self-healing to really know how to be in loving, happy, and functional relationships. I’m not condoning their bad behavior, but if they actually do not know any better, then how can one expect it from them?
I find people who are stuck in such patterns of hurting others are usually very much defensive and in denial. If you gently suggest what you may need from them, or bring up an aspect that the two of you could work on together to improve the relationship, they tend to instantly throw what you say back in your face and make it all about you. Suddenly, all of it is your fault.
This defensive behavior is a clear signal that this person has a lot of hurt, and is either fearful or unable to work through it. Therefore, if you bring up something that triggers their pain, they immediately see it as a threat. They feel attacked, or that they are being made a scapegoat.
The Healing Power Of A Smile
I have noticed something very interesting lately, since we are no longer wearing masks in public. There are two types of people: those who often smile and laugh, and those who do not. You can smile at some people that seem to not be very happy and they will smile right back at you, while others will just look at you like you’re an alien.
I love to smile at people and change their energy, it uplifts them. I can tell. I can see the auric energy around those who smile, and it’s much brighter and lighter. It’s a healing, positive energy. Those that don’t smile have dark and cloudy auras. It makes me feel good to help people get into a better mood and access their higher consciousness, as it will just keep the ball rolling for a positive domino effect for the rest of their day.
But there are those people who find nothing pleasant or amusing and will not smile for anything. I understand that sometimes life just seems to hand us a bad hand of cards, or just seems depressing or no fun. But we all have the ability to smile and our sense of humor is a gift from God. If you can’t smile for yourself to change your own energy, or find yourself unable smile back at those that smile at you, maybe take a look in the mirror and that may inspire you to crack a smile. It changes energy and lives.
As a psychic, I consult many people who are in unloving relationships and marriages. They stay with partners who are unkind, abusive, or unfaithful. They carry a torch for spouses who talk them down to them and make them feel less than. For many it causes mental and physical health problems.
Dating Guidelines For Astrological Compatibility
As a professional astrologer, I’m often asked by clients if their zodiac sign is compatible with someone they are interested in, or currently dating. For this purpose, I have developed over the years through study and experience some simple, yet essential guidelines for astrological romance.
If you are in search of your soulmate, consider the following cosmic guidelines:
Never Date A Neighbor
Rarely are we compatible with the sun signs preceding or following our own sign in the zodiac, even though they flow into one another. Exceptions to this guideline are the Fire and Earth signs: Aries with Taurus, Leo with Virgo, and Sagittarius with Capricorn, but only if the fire sign partner has distinct personality traits of the divine feminine and the earth sign partner tends more towards the divine masculine.
Opposites Rarely Attract
Traditional astrology books on compatibility suggest seeking out the sun sign opposite to your own sign, but in my experience these differences can often be dealbreakers in this day and age. While we want variety and choice in a relationship, I find most people are rarely truly attracted to the signs opposite theirs.
Actions Speak Louder Than Words!
Actions are key in a relationship of any kind, whether it be with family, friends, co-workers, romantic partners, or spouses. Actions indeed speak louder than words! Our behavior and deeds reveal who we truly are. If I was only allowed to offer my clients one piece of relationship advice for the rest of my life, then this would be it: trust what they do, not what they say.
Here is how to look at it. Let’s say you have arranged to go on a date with someone, but they do not show up, and they have all kinds of excuses later. Okay, life happens. So, they did not notify you of their no-show, and they did not care about your feelings in contacting you. Not good. I am not saying dump them right away, but carefully consider how they handled the situation with you. Do they at least appear to care?
This may be a pattern of theirs, so here is where you already need to start watching their actions more carefully. This event may have been due to a random set of unfortunate circumstances beyond their control, or it is an early ‘red flag’ of who they really are. If someone is okay with disappointing or hurting you with the little things, they will have no problem doing the same someday when it truly matters.
Here is another example that I often find in readings: cheating. Let’s say your boyfriend cheated once, and you caught them. He is all upset with himself, and you guys talk it out. He promises he will never do it again. Now, it is one thing for him to say it, but quite another for him to actually keep his word! His future actions will ultimately reveal the truth. If he repeats the same behavior, then his cheating is not just a mistake or a red flag – it is a dealbreaker!
Do You Have A Map For Your Love Journey?
In my experience as a psychic advisor everyone has a unique love journey. Love is a big question for many of my callers, yet the answers from spirit are never exactly the same.
Two of the recurring themes I often find in love and relationship readings are that people have a unique set of dealbreakers, as well as personal love languages. And when these differing needs, wants and expectations are mismatched in a love connection it leads to much disappointment, frustration, heartbreak, and even abuse.
If you have been struggling in the romance department, a good place to start improving your chances of finding or building a lasting love connection is to become more self-aware and conscious of your actual expectations. I find many people lack clarity on this and therefore tend to figure it out by trial and error, which is seldom the best approach.
The first step is to figure out what your love language is. How do you expect to me treated by your partner? How should they ideally behave towards you in your relationship dynamic? If we do not know what love behavior we need from a partner, we are also not able to clearly ask for it. And if we do not ask for what we want and need, we are unlikely to receive it.
For example, some people need lots of verbal affirmation in a relationship, while others value physical touch, or receiving gifts, or acts of kindness, or intellectual stimulation, or emotional support. Some simply require quality time, sharing interests, or having their partner’s full attention from time to time. What is your love language? Continue reading
True Love Is An Eternal Knowing
We can always tell if someone loves us, or not. Simple as that. I know you may be thinking: “What? How can that be?” But believe me, if more people made the effort to be more mindful and aware in this regard, there might be much less disappointment and heartbreak in the world.
How can one tell for sure if someone truly loves you? Well, it’s in the eyes and how they look at you. The eyes are indeed the windows to the soul. We constantly are telepathically communicating with one another and although we may not be picking up on the information consciously, our higher consciousness certainly always is! Energy does not lie.
You can tell if someone cares about you. It’s really that easy. It’s an intuitive feeling, an inner knowing. You just know. It’s how you resonate with each other’s energy. It’s in the way they look into your soul, the vibrational frequency of their voice, the comforting glow of their aura. Trust your intuitive feelings and inner guidance, because we have recorded in our cell memory every single experience we have had with every other soul we are connected to. Your soul will always recognize another soul who is significant to you.
When I do love readings, I can clairvoyantly see this love cord connection right away if two people are meant to be together. It’s much like the silver cord that connects us to our bodies when we astral travel or dream. It’s there because we are connected karmically to someone in this lifetime with a soul contract.