isolation
Isolation Is An Opportunity For Deeper Practice
In the challenging circumstances we are now facing all over the world, many people are facing a period of self-isolation, social distancing, and even quarantine, in the interest of public health. Despite its impact on our lives and economy, a lot of good can also come from this, as it can be approached as an opportunity for spiritual retreat and inner growth.
In many spiritual traditions, solitude and isolation is actually considered essential. And it is not a spiritual practice reserved only for gurus, monks or initiates. It is in fact recommended for everyone to spend some alone time with their thoughts, and their spiritual practice.
Now, I am not talking about a luxury weekend retreat somewhere, on a sunny coast, in the mountains, or in a quaint monastery with beautiful gardens and amazing food. That sort of thing you can do any time of the year, and simply call it vacation!
Isolation is the doorway to an internal practice that leads to a more stable, fulfilled life, among other things. Why more stable? Because everything that we do in isolation, even if we are living with someone else, resonates in our mind in a much deeper sense than usual. Of course, if you do live with a partner or family, there is also the option of doing these practices together, but solitary is usually best.
If you regularly meditate, or pray, or repeat mantras, alone and without distractions, you will feel the powerful ‘echoes’ of those practices energetically. This is true and easy to see, as long as you do not turn on the TV immediately afterwards. I call this a deeper practice.
Inspiration In A Time Of Crisis
During this time of the coronavirus lockdown in Spain, I realize that I am fortunate, and for this I am very grateful. For example, I already work from home and I am also accustomed to a certain amount of social isolation, for reasons of choice, at least for the time being.
Furthermore, I can do and buy the necessary. Here in Spain, we are allowed to go out for necessities, to help the vulnerable, and to walk our dogs, but we are encouraged to keep our distance from others and make shopping a swift event. Again, getting shopping done as quickly as possible has always been my preference anyway!
But, even I am aware of missing the occasional coffee in town with a friend, or being able to travel back to the place I moved from last year, to have lunch with a special friend there. Where I live, people are very social and tactile, and interact at any given occasion. They love to meet at their neighbors’ homes, or in bars and restaurants, which are all currently closed.
I have been thinking how this situation might go one of two ways for many families, currently cooped up in small homes or apartments. They could become very frustrated, especially if there are small children confined in a small space. Or, they might get very creative with how to use their time, as well as appreciating being able to spend time with one another and their pets.
Now Is The Time For Love
There is a lot of anxiety in our world at the moment, due to the ongoing pandemic of the coronavirus, or Covid-19. When this kind of crisis arises, it affects us in the deepest and most primal parts of our inner being. And who we choose to be in such a moment truly matters.
I believe that now is a time for healing. Not only from physical disease, but also from a state of unconsciousness and disconnection that many of us have been fostering, long before we even knew terms like ‘social distancing’ and ‘self-isolation.’ It seems to me as though these terms are just the articulation of an already existing condition that has been in existence long before Covid-19 arrived.
If you are currently fearful and anxious, it is understandable. Be patient and gentle with yourself. If you are struggling to cope, do not hesitate to pick up the phone and reach out to someone that you trust. If you feel isolated, now is the time to freely speak the words, “I love you.” If you have something of value to share, now is the time to give. If you can assist, now is the time to help. Now is the time for love.
There are those that would perpetuate fear at this time. I recommend not listening to such negative voices. Abstain from indulging in conspiracy theories, and trust that, as it is written in Luke 8:17, “There is nothing hidden that will not be revealed, and nothing concealed that will not be known.”
Instead, turn your ear to voices of unconditional love, kindness and compassion. If you have enough ‘soul force,’ become that voice for others. As it is written in 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.”
Do It Anyway
No matter what we go through in life and with who, we always come back to the same place… a familiar place of being alone. The thought occurred to me the other day that we come into this world alone, and we go out alone.
Though we may be surrounded by others, at the end of the day, we are still alone when we go to sleep at night. Even if we are married, or in a relationship with someone who sleeps next to us, we still enter into the sleep state or dream state, alone.
Have you ever noticed that people who are comfortable being alone, have somehow mastered being alone without being lonely? There is a true comfort, freedom, and delight in being by oneself, alone. When we are alone, we can take an honest inventory of our life, who we choose to spend time with, and also decide how we wish to spend our time.
The relationship arena seems to be one of the most challenging areas of life. We all fall into traps and pitfalls that can steer us away from our natural state of happiness , which we come home to when we are alone. However, relationships also seem to provide a fast track for our own personal growth by revealing how we interact with other people.
Our relationships point out areas within ourselves that may require growth or increased self-love. Simply put, relationships show us exactly where we need to focus on to come back to a state of wholeness.
Through The Looking Glass
We tend to not see ourselves accurately. We too often choose to focus on our shortcomings and weaknesses, such as we perceive them to be. And I believe we are all guilty of this. I have not in all my years met anyone who was truly satisfied with themselves – until it was sometimes too late.
I was just as guilty of this as anyone else. My childhood was one that I wouldn’t have wished on my worst enemy. I was abandoned by both parents when I was very young. I was raised by an aunt and uncle, who took pleasure in reminding me that my parents did not love me. My aunt also took every opportunity to beat the daylights out of me, while my uncle did nothing.
When I hit puberty, several older males in my ‘family’ began to stalk and harass me. I’d go into the kitchen and soon find myself backed up against a wall. Nobody believed me. Nobody did anything to stop it – not even when I was raped at 16 by a family friend’s son, who was deemed to be a “good boy” and “would never do anything like that.”
I could go on and on about all the horrible things that happened to me, but once I turned that momentous age of 16, and having had the experiences that I have had, I left my aunt and uncle’s home. I went to live with my boyfriend, his sister and their mom. When I left, my uncle dumped all my clothes on the front lawn.