dysfunctional behavior
Raise Your Vibration With Love And Light
Everything is energy, vibration, and frequency. Everything! Changing your vibration changes your frequency. This can lift the veil between dimensions. You will see things differently. Your intuition will evolve.
If you think limitation, you are limitation. If you think abundance, your are abundance. If you send the universe messages that you deserve something, positive or negative, the universe will send that to you in return. Positive or negative.
I often have clients ask why they keep attracting a certain kind of romantic partner. In my experience the issue is not in the attracting of that person, but rather understanding why they stay with that person.
There are many dysfunctional people in the world. So, attracting dysfunctional people is not unusual. But keeping them in your life, putting up with them, being intimate with them, and marrying them is not about them and their dysfunction. It’s about you. Your vibration is sending out a signal that you believe you deserve that kind of person. If you believe you deserve dysfunction, you will attract dysfunction.
We all meet at least one mentally healthy, well-adjusted person in our lifetime that we were not attracted to. Why? Our vibration was low or not in resonance with that person’s energy.
How do we raise our vibration? By engaging with input energies with high vibration frequencies. If you watch television, watch ‘higher vibration’ television. Bad reality TV, violence, horror movies and crime shows lower your vibration and attract darker energies on all dimensions. Too much radiation from phones, computers and television sets also lowers our vibration.
Lifestyle choices also determine our energetic frequency. Drugs and alcohol lower our vibration. Same goes for processed food with chemicals, additives and pesticides lower our vibration. Conversations that are petty, gossipy, and negative not only degrades others, but also lowers our vibration. Fear, anxiety and anger also lower our vibration.
Learning To Check In With Spirit
It is likely you have a friend, co-worker or relative that is in an unhealthy or even abusive relationship. We all know people who are kind, sweet, giving, and thoughtful, who become involved with emotionally absent, dysfunctional, abusive partners.
I know someone who is currently in such a situation. Her loving nature and generosity far exceeds anything I have ever experienced in another person, and I count myself exceptionally lucky to have her as my friend.
We have known each other for many years, but have only recently developed a much closer relationship, because we have both experienced a deep loss in recent years. Grief and bereavement becomes somewhat more tolerable if one has a close friendship in which you can safely express and share your sorrow.
Judging by my friend’s gentle, kind nature one might expect she would be with a life partner who has similar traits and appreciates her, but shockingly she is in one of the most toxic relationships I have ever encountered. She is not being physically assaulted, but she is subjected to unbearable verbal and emotional abuse.
It has been going on for a very long time. I continue to offer her my unconditional love and support but feel at a loss beyond that. I have asked her why she is still in that situation with so very little to indicate there will ever be any miraculous changes? But she has always evaded these questions.
Recently, she finally confessed her reason for staying with him: she is worried about what people might think and say if she leaves him! I asked her what people? She replied, her friends and family. They might find fault with her for breaking up the family.
Ask Spirit To Guide Your Every Step
As babies we learned to walk on our own. We may have had some guidance and support from our parents or caregivers, to protect us from falling, but in the end we mastered it on our own. And once we learned to walk, we could in time advance to running, skipping, jumping, and so on.
Similarly, we must learn to make major life decisions for ourselves. We may receive guidance and support along the way from others, including Spirit, but in the end, we must master our life choices on our own.
One of the major challenges we all face in life is how we choose to manage stress and hardship in our life. Stress is a given. Setbacks happen. Overcoming adversity is part and parcel of our journey in this lifetime. No one can live an entirely peaceful and easy life of serene bliss, without dealing with some drama and chaos from time to time.
But we choose different ways to cope with the daily challenges of life. Some people choose to lead a healthy, uplifting lifestyle, as well as practice spirituality, while others sadly opt for destructive ways to ‘cope,’ such as substance abuse, various forms of addiction, and self-sabotaging behaviors, which only serves to make their troubles worse.
When it comes to spirituality, everyone must choose their own path. It is usually what works best for you personally that is ultimately the best way to go. But some choose to not have any belief system. One thing I have learned in this life is that spirituality is essential.
You don’t have to go it alone. There is a great force, a powerful presence known as God, Source, Universe, Spirit, the Divine that guides and protects us. All we must do is ask.
Another important life lesson I have learned is that no one can truly know what you are personally going through, except yourself. Others will have their ideas and opinions of who you are, and what you may be going through, but none of that really matters.
Astrology Forecast August 9 – 15, 2021
You may feel overwhelmed or take on too much today and tomorrow, as the Moon moves through expansive Virgo. Remember to pace yourself and where possible, delegate!
Venus in Virgo opposite Neptune in Pisces could create some awkwardness in our relationships and romantic lives today. Former sexual inhibitions or shyness may resurface, or unfilled erotic desires may emerge that could lead to uncharacteristic behavior and unwise sexual choices. Avoid the temptation to stray from a committed relationship today, as it may not end well.
Tomorrow’s Mercury in Leo opposition to Jupiter in Aquarius may cause conflict in discussions about religion and politics. We may also be prone to talk to much and even reveal confidential information that is not ours to disclose. So, tomorrow it may be best to keep our opinions to ourselves, stay out of the office gossip, and say as little as possible, despite our burning curiosity.
The Libra Moon will fortunately lighten the mood for the second half of the week, allowing us to flow with more realistic and achievable goals. That will be punctuated by Mercury’s move into Virgo – it’s ruling sign. It is the perfect time to brainstorm, map out a plan of action, or gather missing details for future projects.
Mercury in Virgo has a way of bringing forgotten ideas to the surface, so we may experience an ‘aha moment’ later this week, as we recall important obligations that have fallen to the back burner. We may also think of friends we’ve lost touch with (social media could reconnect us) and go in search of lost items or paperwork.
A Scorpio Moon this weekend will inspire us to dive deeper into neglected creative or spiritual pursuits. And with Venus moving into its ruling sign of Libra, romance or the search for true love could also prove a fruitful endeavor on Sunday.
Harmony In Your Relationship
How does one achieve true harmony in a relationship? This is probably the most elusive aspect in most relationships these days. Sadly, a happy and healthy relationship cannot be achieved without it also being a harmonious relationship!
To achieve harmony in any relationship, we need to address the following two aspects with honesty and courage.
Firstly, what do you require from the relationship? Are your needs being met, or is the relationship all about them? Too often people settle for a bad relationship instead seeking to fulfill their own wants and needs.
Remember, you matter. You must also be your priority, not just your partner. Your wants and needs are a priority. If you put your needs aside and put everyone before yourself, you will never find harmony or joy in your relationships.
Make a list of your top ten wants or needs. Then make a list of your top five deal-breakers. What will you not tolerate or settle for? Once you have clarity on what you need and expect, you can more easily figure out what to do about it.
A healthy relationship goes both ways, with comprise. Do your best to see that you stay true to your wants and needs. Too many people settle, because they either think they cannot find someone better, or they are scared to move forward on their own. But we must be brave to achieve what we desire in life.
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to find it. You deserve it! You are worth it! If you put all of that out to the Universe and believe it, it will happen for you when the time is right. Belief is key. If you believe it, you will achieve it.
You Are Stronger Than You Think
It is a lesser-known fact that depression can show up in our lives at any time, at a moment’s notice, with no warning. You can be in the happiest time of your life, and it can still sneak up on you.
Depression is a sneaky mental illness. You can do the therapy and treatment, the journaling, meditation, affirmations, and energy healing work all you want, but for some of us it can return at any time and still negatively impact our lives.
Emotionally exhausted days in bed or walking around like a zombie with no motivation or life direction. It is like carrying a bag of rocks on your back that gets heavier and heavier, until it finally overwhelms you entirely.
A person with high-functioning depression can fake a huge smile on the outside, while underneath they are falling apart. Their upbeat laughter and busy schedule are simply a coverup for the dark, ominous shadows that follows them everywhere they go.
For some it ends in suicide. Many of the lives tragically lost over the past year were not all directly due to the SARS-CoV-2 virus. The pandemic has also taken the lives of many people who simply could not cope with the trauma of these challenging times.
The world remains so judgmental about mental illness, despite the recent pandemic that has so brutally exposed its prevalence in our society. The pandemic has also not brought people closer together, as one might expect. Instead, it has torn already dysfunctional families, friendships, and workplaces further apart. It has given rise to abuse, anger, hatred, fear, and intolerance.
But you are stronger than you think. You may even be someone else’s rock at the moment and not even know it. And if the worst is currently upon you, or someone you love, call upon your angels, spirit guides and ancestors to hold you up, to guide you and to lift your energy.
Work Through The Fear, Obligation And Guilt (FOG)
Reflecting on my life I have found how many of my early life experiences have subconsciously influenced me, mostly due to a lack of awareness that allowed fear, a sense of obligation and guilt to remain hidden.
These hidden influences mostly come from my formative years and became obstacles I had to repeatedly struggle with in my adult life with regards relationships, career, finances, family and community.
Once I discovered these non-empowering beliefs, it was time for me to get out of the FOG (Fear, Obligation, Guilt). In hindsight, several things I was unaware of in my family’s dynamics, were actually ‘seeds’ hidden beneath the surface that in time sprouted into personal challenges and self-sabotage.
Fear
Fear and insecurity are frequent visitors for many of us in all areas of life. I was constantly focused on the negative and worst-case scenarios. This is because our brain is wired this way for the purpose of survival. Much of it also depends on our upbringing. So, we must recognize this and catch ourselves early on, in order to shift our thoughts and emotions in a positive direction.
We must be cognitive of our behaviors and explore where in our life we have learned these negative, fear-based responses. Fear is a natural part of life, but can easily become a ‘whack-a-mole’ of frustration, anxiety, uncertainty and indecision, always showing up at the most inconvenient times.