News and Views From The Psychic Access Community

narcissism

Pay Attention Only To Your Soul’s Intent

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comMay I have your complete attention please? I certainly hope not. No one should ever have your full attention. You ‘pay attention’ to yourself, alone. Never, ever, ever in a million billion trillion years are you to give over to another human being your undivided attention, especially if their words are of flattery, praise or exaltation

Exactly what would that entail? Allowing someone else to intrude, violate, impose, and infringe upon the precious sacred theme of your own inviolate mind would be nothing short of blasphemy.

The sanctified domain of your mind is hallowed! Exempt from another’s influence, coercion and derelict impression, your sacred sphere of impenetrable authority is off limits to the invasion of others, no matter their usurped weight and supposed depth of knowledge.

“But, I know what’s good for you,” they might say. Well, chicken squat! No one ever possesses the gift of directed guidance for your particular life. Truth can only be hinted at and never fully expressed. No one is without a self-aggrandized intent of gallows’ ploy.

If you feel someone is using mental intimidation, emotional hyperbole, such as love, hate, guilt, regret, responsibility, respect, adulation, and so forth, as ultimatums, rest assured these worn out blatant tactics are nothing but manipulative water poles to navigate themselves through a river way of shaky unsettled waters.

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Empath Recovery From A Relationship With A Narcissist

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comI wrote a previous article about the phenomenon of empaths having a dangerous attraction to, and engaging in toxic relationships with narcissists. I have since been asked how the empath can more easily break away from such a relationship with a narcissist.

I am sorry to have to say, in my experience there is no surefire way to effortlessly sever such a connection. At least none that I am aware of. The connection between these two seemingly opposing forces is indeed a complicated one, since each of them serves the other with complimentary personality traits. Ending the connection is usually traumatic and detrimental to the empath.

Empaths seem to dive head first into ‘soul sucking.’ They are instinctively drawn to emotionally and mentally toxic relationships with narcissistic partners. It is the nature of the empath to try and heal those who are emotionally, mentally and even physically wounded. And too often the empath will commit almost unconditionally to this task.

The narcissist, however, lacks the ability to empathize with others and acts on their own selfish feelings of grandiosity and self-inflated ego. They serve only themselves and their need for attention and adoration. Their loyalty only lies where it is most beneficial to them. They are therefore capable of tremendous levels of deceit and manipulation. They will abuse the empath both mentally or physically to gain control over nearly every aspect of the empath’s life. They make the entire relationship solely about themselves and their needs.

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Slow And Steady Is The Best Path To Lasting Love

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comIn today’s superficial world of online dating, hookup apps and sexual promiscuity, it’s has become a daunting challenge to find a suitable partner who is genuinely ready for long-term commitment and relationship monogamy.

Also, in the dating scene, people typically wear masks, especially during the initial introduction. Everyone wants to give a good first impression and rarely want to discuss their truth, or past traumas. Dates also like to exaggerate or omit information, to make themselves sound more important or successful than they really are.

A few weeks into a new relationship is usually when the cracks start to show and the truth begins to float to the surface. For example, he comes from a good family and appears to be successful on paper, but he is emotionally fragile, or verbally abusive and narcissistic in relationships. Or, he claims he is totally single when you first meet him, but there’s actually someone else in his life and they’re not breaking that up anytime soon, because they have money invested together or are married.

We too often get so caught up in the fuzzy feeling and fantasy of a person possibly being ‘the one,’ that we forget to question if they are in alignment with what we truly need to add value to our life. Always listen to what a date is telling you, without sugar-coating it for yourself.

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When Enough Is Enough

87387574rRecently, I have had some life experiences which changed my view on how to handle certain situations. Maybe its Uranus’s influence, moving into Taurus recently, that has prompted my sudden shift in behavior and attitude? Or maybe, enough has just finally become enough.

While I love helping people and doing readings, I am also a fixed sign and an Earth element, which means I flourish in endeavors focused on concrete things, such as real estate. So, it’s no surprise that aside from doing psychic mediumship work, I also own and manage multiple rental properties.

Late last year, one of my tenants was going through a tough time. So, I offered to help her by doing a pro bono reading for them. Later, I was delighted when I received feedback that things were getting better for them, and that things were unfolding as I had predicted.

A couple of weeks ago, I received news that they had decided to act on the advice given in the reading, and were now moving out in June. While I was saddened to see them leave, I was somewhat relieved that I could now find more stable tenants for that property. In the same sentence, she asked if I minded doing another reading for them both, before they left the property. I gladly agreed and scheduled the reading for the next day.

After the reading was again done free of charge, they proceeded to inform me of their intentions to not honor the terms on their lease! With each sentence they spoke, the information became more and more dreadful. I’m sure by the time they had finished, my mouth was a gaping hole. I was in complete shock over what they had told me.

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The Integrity Of Being Non-Judgmental

click here to get a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.com

This is the age of being non-judgmental. So, does this mean you love and accept your neighbor who is a registered sex offender? Do you not say anything to your best friend when her partner is cheating on her, or stealing from her, because you don’t want to judge and be negative? Where does being non-judgmental begin and end? And what if non-judgment is really cowardice instead?

Native people all over the world, before so-called civilization, did not have police or prisons. Tribal members held each other accountable, on many different levels. You could not act in a way that was harmful to the rest of the tribe, without someone calling you out and bringing you before the elders, the shamans, or the tribal council. Tribes would punish or exile any person that caused harm to the tribe.

These days, if you dare call anyone out for their misconduct, you risk being branded as negative and judgmental, and told you need to practice unconditional love. Sadly, this means that it usually takes decades of abuse, before something like the Me Too movement, or any form of human or civil rights abuse is finally brought into the light and confronted.

Sociology and Social Psychology label tribal culture as form of collectivism, meaning the good of the majority comes first, before the needs of the individual. But in some circles fearmongers prefer to label collectivist behavior as ‘socialism’ or ‘communism.’ Continue reading

How To Be That One Person

click pic for a free reading at PsychicAccess.comBeing a ‘helper’ in someone’s life is a sacred task. To be the one person who believes deeply in another, who ‘sees’ them despite their current circumstances, to be that person who expects them to be bigger than they are, who helps them see and reach beyond where they are now, and who never abandons them, while managing to hold your own space and not get victimized or abused by their lashing out… these are the actions and  expressions of spiritual maturity expressed as universal love.

Universal love and tolerance is not a choice for ‘weenies.’ It is in fact a hero’s journey. By the way, I do not use the term ‘unconditional love,’ because I feel it is an overused cliché and it too often implies a world of hugs, kisses, complements and affirmations – and that is not all that love is. Those expressions of love are often the self-gratification addiction of a wounded person, who needs to be thanked and adored for giving ‘love’ to someone else. It is typically also the trademarks of a co-dependent, or narcissist.

Hugs and kisses represent only one aspect of love. It is the safest and most fun aspect of ‘showing love.’ However, love is not simply all about physical tokens and making someone else ‘feel good,’ so you also can feel good. To be a loving, spiritually aware, humble, strong ‘secret agent’ of love goes way beyond dishing out hugs and kisses.

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‘Handling’ People

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comWhen people ‘handle’ me, it makes my skin crawl, literally. Why do people feel the need to ‘handle’ others? What is the difference between say being diplomatic with someone, being professional, or having boundaries, all of which are healthy behaviors, compared to ‘handling’ someone? The simple answer is energy.

Handling someone means you are a closed book, you have an agenda with a person and you want to accomplish that agenda, whether it is to get something from the person or to make that person go away (without you simply setting a boundary or being honest).

People who ‘handle’ others often do not know that is what they are doing; it is their unconscious ‘go-to’ behavior, their norm. Some ways of discovering if you are handling versus relating to someone, is to look at your other choices.

You may not realize that addicts always need handling. So, if you are an addict (of any kind — drugs, alcohol, sugar, sex, anything you feel compelled to do in excess), or if you tend to date, marry or make friends with addicts of any sort, you are more than likely someone who ‘handles’ others, as well as yourself. A handler type person will choose addicts often without realizing or admitting to themselves that they are an addict, because addicts do in fact need to be ‘handled’ until they come out of denial and start to participate in their recovery.

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