ego
Learning To Check In With Spirit
It is likely you have a friend, co-worker or relative that is in an unhealthy or even abusive relationship. We all know people who are kind, sweet, giving, and thoughtful, who become involved with emotionally absent, dysfunctional, abusive partners.
I know someone who is currently in such a situation. Her loving nature and generosity far exceeds anything I have ever experienced in another person, and I count myself exceptionally lucky to have her as my friend.
We have known each other for many years, but have only recently developed a much closer relationship, because we have both experienced a deep loss in recent years. Grief and bereavement becomes somewhat more tolerable if one has a close friendship in which you can safely express and share your sorrow.
Judging by my friend’s gentle, kind nature one might expect she would be with a life partner who has similar traits and appreciates her, but shockingly she is in one of the most toxic relationships I have ever encountered. She is not being physically assaulted, but she is subjected to unbearable verbal and emotional abuse.
It has been going on for a very long time. I continue to offer her my unconditional love and support but feel at a loss beyond that. I have asked her why she is still in that situation with so very little to indicate there will ever be any miraculous changes? But she has always evaded these questions.
Recently, she finally confessed her reason for staying with him: she is worried about what people might think and say if she leaves him! I asked her what people? She replied, her friends and family. They might find fault with her for breaking up the family.
Opening To Divine Guidance
Beginning to work with your angels and spirit guides is just like learning any other new skill. It requires patience, commitment, openness, and a willingness to ask for help.
In fact, I compare opening to divine guidance to learning a new language, because in essence you are discovering the ways you and your ‘spirit team’ communicate with one another.
Everyone has this ability and if you are willing to put forward the effort, the dividends will be life-changing in positive and joyful ways.
The first step, as with everything related to spirit, is to set the intention to work more closely with your spirit team. Ask your spirit team to work more closely with you. Empower them to turn up the volume of their communication with you.
It is important to remember that you are an important member of your team. You are not a subordinate or lesser, because you are in physical form.
In fact, our spirit team reveres us for our courage to come forward into this lifetime, and they assembled strictly for the purpose of supporting us in this endeavor. They are here to make your life easier and to support you, so let them!
The first way spirit communicates with us is through signs. This can be something as profound as a book we need to read falling off the shelf in front of us at a bookstore; or overhearing a conversation that answers a question in your heart; or something as simple as finding feathers and pennies on the sidewalk.
The key to determining if something is divine guidance or not, is how it makes us feel. If we feel love and inspiration, rightness in our heart, mind and body, then it is a Divine message. If it makes us feel scared, frightened, or disempowered then it is not divine guidance, it is human ego.
Children Are Messengers Of Light
We have all been witness to a child’s laughter. There is just nothing else like it. Such complete innocence, joy and bliss! It must be the most wonderful thing one can hear.
A child’s laughter evokes a feeling of pure and complete connection with the Light. Why is that? I believe it is because children are so connected to God. It even says so in the Bible. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
Children are so free of ego and they can have authentic conversations, while so many adults have to struggle with being true to themselves. We struggle with letting our own light shine, but children are full of truth, kindness and mean no harm. The children of our world are messengers of love and light.
Sadly, we as adults sometimes get short with kids, because we feel what we are doing is so much more important than their simple pursuits. Instead we should maybe let go of the mouse, get off the computer and play with our kids. Try it and see how their love light shine so brightly, because of the attention and time you devote to them.
When I do readings for people and they are struggling in relationships and with self-esteem. I often ask them whether their mother and father talked to them. Did they read to them? Play with them? Many times our adult struggles go back to not being given that soothing touch at a young age or being ignored as a child.
So parents, let’s change the world one child at a time and give back for all the love, joy and hope that they bring us. It’s so simple. Just spend time with your child.
I used to baby sit for a child whose parents were so busy working all the time. Sadly, he would go from daycare to babysitter on rotation. I could see in his eyes the lack of love, but he would always greet me with a smile and a picture that I could tell he had worked diligently on. I would drop to my knees and hug him, and I could just feel him soaking it in like a plant that hadn’t been watered in a long, long time.
Have Your Guides Led You Astray?
“My guides must hate me! They only lead me to things that cause me pain,” one of my clients recently complained. It is also not the first time I have heard something like this.
But how can this be? If our angels, guides and ancestors are here to help us, why do they lead us to things that cause us pain, heartache, or grief? Is spirit perhaps not actually guiding us, but hurting us instead? And if that is the case, what are we to do about it?
In my years of working as a professional psychic and energy healer, as well as my personal life experiences, I have come to the following conclusion on this matter. Our guides have only one mission: to love and support us unconditionally. Any deviation from our highest good is never due to the guidance of spirit, but instead the result of one or more of the following:
Ego Interference
Often, when we believe we are ‘following our guides,’ we are actually following a wounded part of our ego that continues to create a reality of pain – because that is all that we know. Your guides will never encourage you to do anything that causes you, or another person harm. Your spirit guardians will never make you feel belittled, intimidated or frightened.
Now, it is important to note they may steer you towards life choices and experiences that may make you feel somewhat uncomfortable or challenged, because it is outside of your comfort zone and they are wanting you to grow and expand. But there is a difference between being gently nudged towards personal growth and soul expansion, and simply being frightened or emotionally crushed
Lack Of Listening
The fundamental question with spirit guidance is whether are you truly listening? Sometimes we are in so much anger or pain that our guides are actually communicating with us, and guiding us, in vain, because we are unable to hear it clearly.
Explore ways to turn off the destructive self-talk and emotional intensity, and work on tapping into your inner guidance and listening to your inner voice.
For example, ask your angels, guides or ancestors to work with you in the dream state. Once the conscious mind that is hurting so much is asleep, it is much easier for our guides to come in and do their work.
The Moral Of The Story
Since childhood, I have always loved fables and allegories, as well as the parables in The Bible. Indeed, one of my favorites is The Widow’s Two Mites in Luke 21. As a little girl, I used to listen intently to the story of the poor widow who gave more generously to charity than anyone else in the temple, because she gave all that she had. The life lessons and spiritual wisdom in these stories fascinated me.
Recently, I discovered an amusing tale that deals with both the ego and the need to be pragmatic. Three monks sat on a bankside, each in deep meditation. One of the monks, however, became cold, and this interrupted his ability to meditate. He told the other two that he was heading back to their cabin to find his blanket. Off he went, crossing the stream both ways with no problem. Soon he was back, in next to no time, and as dry as he was when he had left.
A short while later, another monk remembered that he had not left his wet clothes out to dry, so he too needed to head back to the cabin to tend to his laundry. Off he also went. The third monk saw, in amazement, how he easily walked across the water back to the cabin, and when he returned, just like the other monk, he was as dry as he had set off.
Seeing his two fellow monks cross the creek without getting wet infuriated the third monk. “So, you think you are both better than me!” he yelled at them. “Well, I will show you that if you can walk on water, then so can I!”
He ran up to the stream, put his foot on the surface of the water and instantly fell in, waist-deep! As a result, the third monk became even angrier and yet more determined to walk on the water. But time and time again he attempted to cross the creek without getting wet, but to no avail.
Distraught by his many failed attempts, one of the other two monks turned around to his friend and said, “Don’t you think it is time we tell him where those stepping stones are?”
This story did not only make me smile, but it also made me reflect upon my life. Indeed, there have been times when I allowed my ego, needlessly, to stand in the way of my better judgment. Like that third monk, I have also allowed myself to become envious and upset by comparing my own achievements to that of others.
Integrating With 5th Dimension Energies
Our world is undergoing a spiritual detox, and it has been putting immense pressure on everyone to take a leap of faith into the fifth dimension of love… or continue living at a lower vibration in the third dimension of ego.
The people who are choosing to elevate themselves at this time, or in the future, may be experiencing ascension symptoms that range from feeling exhausted, confused, physically sick, overly emotional, and disconnected. This is to be expected, since you are cleansing yourself of things, places or people you no longer identify with.
Those who are stuck in the third dimension thrive on creating drama, are typically narcissistic, and have an aura that is muddled in color. They tend to resort to mind games in relationships and have a difficult time being honest about their intentions. Third dimensional people also go along with the crowd, need to be accepted by others incessantly and develop codependent, toxic relationships.
Third dimensional people also tend to be two-faced, because they have more difficulty integrating the darkness-light polarity within them. Those who are empathetic or intuitive generally sense their energy being depleted when around third dimensional people, so it’s best to keep your distance and say no when necessary.
How To Be A Good Friend
I just read a blog written by a spiritual person feeling angry and lonely. She had reached out to a trusted friend, but the friend only wanted to talk about her own problems. And when she did pay some attention to her plight, the best the friend could offer was to be judgmental and unsympathetic. The author then also reached out for support on a social media group for spiritually aware people. Again, all of the members did the same thing her friend did: they judged!
The woman was having problems with her abusive neighbor and many people on the forum were giving advice for her to leave. They told her to move, find a better place to live, relocate. “Moving is 100% your choice,” one person commented. The first thing I thought was no, it isn’t. This particular woman, for example, had bought the house and had put a lot of money into renovating the house. She would need to sell, at a time when not many things are selling, and possibly suffer a significant financial loss.
Some even told her to get more exercise, so that she can relax and focus on other things. They told her she was responsible for her own choice of reactions and feelings in the situation. The only insensitive, stereotypical thing they didn’t say was to take a breath and calm down. Don’t you just hate it when someone says that? It does everything, but calm you down!
The people responding, in their judgment, needed to feel superior. It was about them, not her. Her responses were defensive, understandably. I felt by her response, they made her feel more lonely. Poor woman.