shadow work
The What-ifs That Go Bump In The Night
When I grow up, I want to be a lightworker! Okay, so I’ve grown up and I’ve been a psychic and healer for many years. The question now is, how do I take back, or erase from my mind’s eye all that I’ve seen? ‘Wounded healer, heal thyself’ is a very old truth, which still holds merit after many years of being bandied about.
Perhaps today it is more true than ever. In today’s world we are dealing with much more fear and what-ifs than ever before in our lifetime. Someone, or something, somewhere – the news media for one – is always preying on our fears. Panic and perpetual fear is the name of the game for many in our world these days.
Psychics, astrologers, mediums, diviners, and energy healers, among other, are known by the universal term ‘lightworkers.’ This is ironic, considering we often have to delve into the darkest fears of most people head-first, in order to help our fellow humans come to some form of clarity, healing or conclusion.
And what happens when the lightworker’s battery begins to fade from overuse and not enough recharging? Can helping other people face their fears make our own fears and limiting beliefs become larger by proxy, thus causing our own light to dim?
Lightworkers are born healers and teachers. At our core we want to help everyone. We know that inner peace comes from within. However, some of our clients are open to guidance, while others are not. Maybe I only speak for myself as a healer, but those who refuse guidance often haunt me far longer than those who embrace it. They are the ones who keep me up at night. They are the ones who make me doubt and question what I know in my heart to be true, based on my ability to listen to a Higher Power and relay messages spirit wants to share.
Face your fears, I tell myself. Even as a wounded healer, I must continue to face my self-doubt and remember to look upon the bright side: the countless souls whose lives I have been blessed to change and help make into something brighter, better and more fulfilling.
Embracing The Shadow
When I first began to intentionally and consciously walk a spiritual path, I remember doing so because it just felt so right. Every step I took toward ‘enlightenment’ in this lifetime seemed to bring more brightness into my life, and so many more blessings.
In those early days I was really rolling! I was expecting this to be an easy ride – all joy and light and love. It was wonderful.
What I hadn’t expected was the inevitable emergence of my shadow through as a result of all my spiritual work. And it was not something I was going to be comfortable with – admitting I had places of darkness within me, unloved aspects of myself, disowned pieces of my soul which had been abandoned and in such pain.
Through a series of, what seemed like, unfortunate events, I was given opportunities to face my shadow side. Challenges in relationships with friends and loved ones arose. I couldn’t understand it at first, and felt very alone and misunderstood. I was shifting the blame for this onto the people around me, instead of going inward.
Going inward, into the light, was totally okay, but going inward into the darkness was terrifying. My ego-self raised every defense to keep me from going there. Eventually, I could avoid it no longer.
My life at this point had endured tremendous change in the course of only a few years- so much so, that the entire landscape of my existence and the people in it were now different. While many of the changes were positive, the magnitude of the differences between my ‘old life’ and my ‘new life’ forced me into robust self-reflection.
Where did I want to go with my life? What did I want to do? And who was I going to be? I must admit, these were heavy questions, and I absolutely felt the weight of them. In addition, I was healing from a personal loss, and that was taking more time than I wanted it to.
My ‘aha moment’ came when I was lamenting one day about my relationship with my partner. I had identified that I wanted a deeper level of connection, but felt that he was unwilling to meet me there.
Let It Go Like The Leaves Of Fall
Sitting at my living room’s huge picture window this morning, I saw the trees blowing in the wind outside and the colorful leaves that are slowly turning, before they will finally let go of those branches that they were a part of for so long.
The turn of the season is in full swing outside my window and the morning rain has passed. It is a typical fall day here. You really truly never know what you’re going to get with our weather. People often say the weather here is bipolar! We tend to get all the seasons in one day – summer, fall and sometimes even winter, all in one day!
Earlier it was raining outside – a great time for me to sit quietly and indulge in some deep mediation and chakra balancing. I do this to raise my vibration for the day ahead, which will include the channeling of messages for my clients, courtesy of their spirit guides, ancestors and dearly departed loved ones.
After calibrating my energy centers. I invited my main guide to share with me some general spiritual guidance that may benefit all of my clients today. Is there anything that I need to share with them at this time?
I closed my eyes and went in deep. My guide told me to help heal those who need it at the core level in these difficult times. I am to help them to let go of feelings that they have struggled with since childhood, and to replace it with healing light and invite in new, higher vibrations.
Keeping pent-up emotions is causing much dis-ease these days, and it has been hindering many people who will be approaching me today for help, spirit said. I need to plant seeds of healing in their minds and teach them that they have the power to do it too!
Once In A Blue Moon
The metaphysics for this month is subject to an astrological rarity. October 2020 features what is known as a Blue Moon, or a second Full Moon in the same calendar month. This month’s second Full Moon will take place next week, on October 31st, and is traditionally known as the Hunter’s Moon. It follows the Harvest Full Moon that took place on October 1st.
As you may have guessed, the phenomenon of the Blue Moon gave rise to the popular saying ‘once in a blue moon.’ It is used to refer to something that is unusual or special, or a rare event that seldom happens.
The origin of the term itself is unclear, but it has nothing to do with the actual color of the Moon. The earliest written record of the term ‘blue moon’ has been found in an 1528 pamphlet composed by two friars, William Roy and Jerome Barlow, in which they state, “Oh church men are wily foxes… If they say the moon is blue, we must believe that it is true.” It has since become part of pop culture and modern folklore, including being the namesake of popular songs and movies.
Astrologically speaking, two full moons in a month only takes place about seven times every nineteen years, due to the way the Moon’s orbital cycle does not line up exactly with calendars on Earth. It’s a rarity, for sure.
So, what can we expect during such a rare event?
Spiritual Ascension 2020
When we experience a big shift or breakthrough, it will often feel like our lives are falling apart in order for something greater to manifest. The year 2020 is a prime example of this. It continues to be an extreme year on all levels, and it has truly been testing our inner and outer world.
I believe there is a spiritual reason for all of this. We are shifting into the Age of Aquarius. Our purpose, spiritual connection, relationships, and physical bodies are in the midst of a major spiritual awakening that feels like an intense storm or crisis for many of us.
We are now becoming more aware of the people, places and circumstances that no longer serve us. It is an opportunity to strengthen our intuition and re-calibrate our inner compass.
Emotions are also running high this year, since we are constantly being triggered, but it’s happening to get us in touch with who we really are as spiritual beings, and to help us navigate through the fears connected to our past traumas.
It is meant to integrate the light and dark aspects within each of us, and to embrace it wholeheartedly, without caring what other people may think.
You may also have been noticing certain ascension symptoms. For example, your body no longer wants certain foods, and substances, so be sure to cut back on anything that makes you tired or irritable, or causes you physical discomfort. Drink lots of water, keep a health journal, get some exercise, and eat a healthy, wholesome diet. It will help you be more calm and mindful during these demanding times.
There will continue to be days of anxiety, anger, impatience and frustration, so be sure to acknowledge when any such negative emotions surface, so you can find a moment to breathe and re-direct your energy into something that helps you find greater peace of mind.
What Is Blocking Your Progress?
Picture yourself driving down a nice country road. There is no traffic to speak of, the sun is shining beautifully in the cloudless sky, and all is right with the world. You have no particular timeline or agenda in mind, this is a rare moment of bliss which you totally intend to take advantage of.
But, as you come around the next bend in the road, there, out of the blue, appears to be an exceptionally large branch completely blocking the way. What to do now? Well, you have always thought of yourself as a somewhat smart and resourceful soul, so there is no doubt in your mind that you will arrive at a logical and workable conclusion.
After careful examination, you begin to realize this is a little more serious than what you had initially thought, so now alternate plans must be put in place. Out comes the trusted cell phone, to call the nearest towing company. Perhaps they will be able to haul the branch out of the way!
Oh no, you are in a cellular dead zone and there is no signal, so the calling option is out. What next? Well, with a little pushing and prodding, maybe you could clear the path yourself? After an exhausting attempt you quickly realize this is not going to work either. Time out is called for, so you may rally all your brilliant thoughts to reach a viable and successful conclusion.
Then you have an inspired idea. If all else fails, maybe you can navigate around the branch just enough to get free and clear, and continue on your merry way? You try and…well, lo and behold, that worked amazingly well!
Spiritual Attachment And Detachment
The physical world is not the only realm in which some of us struggle with issues of detachment (alienation), or attachment (codependency). The same holds true in the spirit realms.
If we experience spiritual attachment, this usually happens as a result of an addictive personality. In life, one could be addicted to unhealthy relationships, various substances, shopping, food, and so on. The driving force behind all of these is basically the same – the attempt to fill a perceived void with a substitute.
This inclination can then lead to the presence of negative spirit attachments with addictive energies. Perhaps the spirit entity had the same kind of addiction when it was in physical form, and still needs to experience that ‘high.’
When this happens, the victim in the physical world, to whom the spirit entity has attached itself, may become more stubborn and in denial over the need to change their habits. Many friends and family members who have had to deal with addicts, will tell you that addiction changed their loved one’s personality. From a spiritual perspective this is very true.
Spiritual detachment, on the other hand, happens when someone is the victim of abuse or trauma. A part of themselves ‘detaches’ or becomes distant from their core self, which may unintentionally invite a more powerful spirit presence to enter, to ‘protect’ or ‘guide’ the victim. Aristotle’s phrase ‘nature abhors a vacuum’ comes to mind. It means every space or void in nature always needs to be filled with something. The same holds true in the spirit realm.