death
Praying For Your Departed Loved Ones
A client recently asked me if there is any benefit to praying for a loved one who has passed away? Does it make a difference in their transition to their new plane of existence? Can it somehow assist them in their continued existence in the afterlife? Can they even hear us?
We can absolutely connect with the spirits of those who have passed on, although it may sometimes feelas if they cannot hear us. Whether we are praying for them, talking to them, or simply grieving for them, we are connecting with them on a spiritual level and they are hearing us.
In fact, praying for our deceased loved ones has a very positive effect on their soul journey and they deeply appreciate it.
Some people believe that when we die, we go to some blissful realm of perfect existence where all our problems and karmic debts are instantly resolved, or left behind on the earth plane for others to deal with or pick up the pieces. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Most of us will pass away someday with some unresolved issues, negative feelings, resentments, grudges, or regrets that we will need to continue to work on in the afterlife. Of course, some of us will have much more to work on than others. Just because we leave this physical world does not mean that we are free of all our responsibilities and no longer accountable for anything or anyone.
It is therefore helpful to send our prayers to departed loved ones to help them with whatever spiritual or karmic “baggage” they may be taking along with them on their journey to the other side. Although they may leave behind symptoms of illness or financial debt, for example, their spiritual ailments will still need to be healed.
Grieving The Loss Of Loved Ones With Grace
Few of us have not experienced the loss of a loved one, a parent, a partner or even a child. Most of us have also witnessed or experienced the many ways in which people try to cope with such an insurmountable loss.
Coping with the huge gaping hole that such a loss leaves in our lives can have a negative impact on people’s behaviour. Some turn to extremes: alcohol, drug abuse, overeating, prescription drugs, or any of the other things people use to numb their pain and deflect the overwhelming feelings associated with loss and grief.
What we ultimately learn is that there is no set time frame in which such profound pain can be dealt with. It can take weeks, months, years or even decades for some. But even when the worst is over, we never really get over the sense of loss. We simply learn to cope and get on with our lives, forever changed, as best we can.
However, the greatest tribute we can pay the loved ones we have lost is to grieve with grace and dignity. Abusing substances or indulging in other distractions may temporarily numb our pain, but how does that honour the memory of the one we professed to care so much about? It also does not allow us to confront and process our emotions in a healthy and constructive manner. Grieving is natural and necessary. When we try to avoid our grief, we miss out on opportunities for personal growth, self-reflection, and ultimately finding peace with the loss.
Why Some Souls Depart This Life Early
In over 15 years of doing spiritual readings, I’ve had to deal with some very difficult questions from clients who have suffered extreme loss or trauma.
One of the most heartbreaking, however, is making sense of the death of an infant, child, or young adult, sometimes after a cruel and very unpredictable death.
Grieving the death of a young person can bring up some of the most profound and challenging emotions. While it is never easy to address this kind of loss with grieving parents and relatives, Spirit has been consistent in its guidance over the years.
Although I have been spared the loss of someone so young in my own life, I am no stranger to it. I have supported many families in this regard over the years, both professionally and in my personal life.
The first time I realized how fragile life really is, was when I was only 12 years old. I was looking forward to the summer vacation from school. One of my classmates who lived down the street and her family had relatives visiting for the summer. Two of the visiting cousins were more or less our age, so I had a nice group of girl playmates for the season!
There was also the younger brother of the visiting cousins, who was only six years old. He was an adorable child with blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a freckled face full of mischief. He followed his two sisters, my girlfriend, and me wherever we went during those carefree days. I did not mind having him around and even encouraged the others to let him play hide-and-seek and many other childhood games with us.
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
Many people I know, including myself and several of my clients, have experienced the loss of a child or grandchild.
Losing a grandparent or parent is heartbreaking, but losing a child is absolutely devastating! It is difficult to understand why someone so young is taken before they had a chance to live a full life.
A few years ago, I found some solace for my continuing grief from a very unexpected source.
I am an avid Nascar fan. If you don’t know what Nascar is, it is the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing. Stock car racing is one of the largest spectator sports in America.
A few years ago I watched an interview with one of the masters of this sport, Richard Petty, also known as “The King.” His words struck a deep chord with me.
Richard Petty’s grandson, Adam Petty, was also a racer like his grandfather. He was only 19 when he died in an accident on May 12, 2000 while practicing the sport he loved so much. His car hit the outside wall of the track, killing him instantly.
In the interview I watched, his grandfather spoke of his depression, guilt, grief, and not wanting to get out of bed because he felt he was somehow to blame for encouraging his grandson to pursue this sport that cost him his young life.
The Exit Points In Our Soul Plan
I believe that we have access to several ‘exit points’ throughout our lives. These are moments when our spirit or soul can separate from its physical form to return to the non-physical. It is said that we are given a few such exit points in our lifetime.
Planet Earth is not our primary home. I like to think of our physical existence in this world as a challenging ‘schoolroom’. This physical life journey can be very difficult at times, and I find that it makes things a little easier if we can look at it from this perspective.
I have yet to meet a person who has had a complete fairytale existence in their life. We have all had some magical moments, but not necessarily as magical as some far-fetched novels or films might portray. Sometimes we feel like we’re banging our heads against the wall just to survive on a daily basis, physically, financially or emotionally, but deep down we all have a built-in survival instinct to stay and complete what we incarnated to do.
Exit points are moments when we have the free will choice to stay in this physical world or return to the non-physical. These moments of choice can be a major health emergency, a near fatal accident, a traumatic event in which we are exposed to extreme danger, and so on. It is usually one of those profound life experiences that make us feel very lucky to still be alive!