Healing
The Soul Gold Of Dysfunctional Relationships
When I was younger, I actually searched for my birth certificate, just to see if I really was a member of my family! I’ve witnessed some close-knit and very loving families among my friends and acquaintances, which I admire and applaud. But not everyone is that fortunate. It seems some of us are thrown together in families we cannot help but wonder where we all fit in. For many of us our family and romantic relationships are complicated.
We typically grow up seeing perfect families on television and in the movies. We also observe them during summer vacations and winter holidays. But I have always preferred the exceptions to the rule, the alternative families, the dysfunctional, weird and wonderful family stories, because they portray real life with humor.
Growing up my family did the best they could with what they had and what they knew at the time. In our family there was much avoidance, secrets, Catholic school and the constant overhanging threat of being ‘sent to a nunnery.’ Role-models for how to build healthy, constructive I did not have. So, I had to figure it out on my own, making many mistakes along the way.
I have even attributed my sense of not belonging in my family to the planets: my Aquarius Sun sign and Sagittarius Rising sign. I assumed my tendency to be a bit of a star child, moving to the strange music in my own head, just needed its own space? Upon a closer look, as the years went by, my father and I had many similar traits, with some of my mother’s mixed in on the spectrum.
I was constantly searching for that next subject to study and different ways to escape through my imagination. I also closed down when people came too close and moved along as quickly as possible.
The Divine Justice Of Karmic Lessons
We sometimes feel we have been wronged by others in some awful way, and then we wonder if the perpetrators will get their ‘come uppance’ or ‘just deserts.’ We wish to know if divine justice will be served upon them.
Sometimes we are so upset or angry that we would like to see this retribution happen immediately and right before our very eyes. In these emotional moments we are out for revenge and want to see the other person reap what they’ve sown. We believe it may bring us some peace that justice has finally been done.
As a youngster, I often heard my mother refer to it as “The Law of Return,” suggesting that whatever we put out there, both good and bad, will always come back to us. She would say that it always comes back to us tenfold!
There are also spiritual teachings and wisdom traditions that suggest if we don’t learn our lessons and correct our mistakes in this lifetime, it will become karmic in the next. It further suggests that we eventually will experience whatever harm or wrongdoing we have imposed upon others in our own life, sometimes for several lifetimes, until we’ve truly learned our lesson.
So, will others get what’s coming to them for the pain and suffering they have caused us? It’s my experience that this is rarely the case, but from evidential mediumship messages, I am convinced that a life review, when we reach the other side, is inevitable. The soul who has hurt someone else, will be held accountable and will feel what the other person felt very intensely.
I do know from spirit messages that have come through from certain relatives and family members on the other side, that they have relived what I had felt when they were harsh towards in this life. Spirit often comes through with messages of guilt, remorse and regret. The aim is usually to seek healing and forgiveness.
Seeing Yourself As You Truly Are
The art of ‘being seen’ begins within. It is not in the eyes, or heart, of an external beholder. It is the grace of being able to see oneself through the Divine Eyes of our Creator.
Every soul is unique. No two are the same. Each soul emanates from the Supreme Loving Source to offer its unique beauty and pleasure to God in an incomparable, individual way. When we look at ourselves through this lens, the true beauty, light, and power of the spiritual spark of our being shines upon our inner vision.
Relationships offer mirrors too. But what they show vary according to the quality of the reflecting surface. And what we see in them depends upon how well we know, see, and stand in the truth of our own higher self.
For example, if I look at myself in a broken mirror, do I see a crack in my face? I might…if I am not sure of who I am. However, if I know myself to be whole, I can readily recognize that the crack is in the mirror, and not in my face.
Similarly, there are relationships in life that reflect broken images back to us. That does not mean that we are broken, nor that the other person or people involved are broken either. We all have wounds and scars and other gaping holes yet to be healed, or not.
Whatever the case may be, it is the relationship itself that offers up the reflective element. It is the dynamic of exchange that shows itself as either clean, clear, balanced, cracked, smeared, skewed, and so on.
Knowing oneself in truth and wholeness is thus extremely valuable. If we do not possess such certainty of self, we may accept a broken or distorted impression projected by an ill-functioning relationship to be a reflection upon ourselves.
Tune Into The Guidance Of Your Emotions
I believe our emotions are an additional ‘sense’ we use as a means of interpreting our life experiences, in the same way the normal five senses enable us to perceive and understand the world around us. Our ‘emotional sense’ help us make decisions about our preferences all the time.
For example, I love chocolate. My sense of taste tells me that chocolate is for me! It’s a very clear and obvious signal from my taste buds to my brain. We receive and process stimuli all the time and our senses help us to ‘make sense’ of that input.
Your emotions are also giving you information about your preferences and if we listen and pay attention, we can gain a lot of guidance from it. Our emotions don’t just come from nowhere. They arise in direct response to stimuli or input, just like our senses do.
I have also heard emotions described as an internal guidance system, or our inner compass, which helps us decide what we want to create more of, and less of, in our life. We sometimes get confused though, because just like the other senses, we have different preferences.
For example, some people love coconut desserts, but I detest then. Not thanks, keep your coconut out of my chocolate! The thing is, I’m not confused about the fact that I don’t like coconut. I also don’t feel I have to change my preference because other people love coconut. And I also don’t force myself to eat it, just to make other people happy.
When one of our five physical senses tells us something we tend to listen, because it’s visceral. We feel it undeniably in the body. Emotions are no different!
When you are heartbroken, do you not feel it in your chest as a physical pain? When you are embarrassed, do your cheeks or ears not become flushed? Or how about when someone you love hugs you so warm and deliciously, all your muscles just ‘melt’ into that person? These are all physical responses the accompany our emotions.
We Are Here To Witness The World Change
We have all had to make extreme changes and compromises in the way we were accustomed to living this past year. While I enjoy traveling, another person may enjoy attending larger gatherings and events, while someone else might love dining out. Whatever it is that we used to love doing, most of us had to make major concessions and sacrifices and give it all up.
Now our world is slowly, but surely, beginning to recover. We have all been eagerly watching medical science progress and research findings unfold, while we are gradually finding our way back to some sort of normalcy.
Many of us will, however, continue to take extra health and safety precautions. Participating in social events and public gatherings will be something not everyone will feel entirely comfortable with anytime soon. It will be ‘baby steps’ as we increasingly return to everyday life.
It has indeed been an unusual time in our lives. Many of us have changed our outlook on life, our way of thinking, our priorities. And our world has seen some significant changes. It has been a challenging, transformative time. I believe we are here to witness one of the biggest shifts or changes in world history. We are literally a part of history in the making.
There are great changes happening on the fourth and higher-level dimensions with regards a ‘grander plan’ for this earth dimension. The world of spirit continually impacts the earth plane in profound ways. Alchemists and metaphysicians have always believed ‘what happens above, also happens below.’
In other words, things are currently changing or shifting in the spirit realm, so life on earth is changing along with it. The trauma, upheaval and chaos we have been experiencing in recent times is therefore fueled or driven by a Universal change in the Cosmos.
We are sentient beings who come to the earth plan to evolve and expand. We evolve more quickly and powerfully while we are incarnated in a physical body. Our body is our vehicle here on the earth plane and we must always take good care of it.
Journeys And Destinations
One often hears the saying “It’s about the journey, not the destination.’ But what does it truly mean? I believe the events of the past year has brought many of us to a deeper understanding.
The importance of the ‘journey’ became more evident with so many cultural holidays, birthday parties and family gatherings that had to be cancelled during the worst of the pandemic. For example, the significance of planning these special events became especially obvious this past Christmas, as well as the many cancelled festivals here in Spain.
The Christmas holiday season is usually a hectic time, with much hustle and bustle, including the mandatory family conflicts or ‘differences of opinion.’ But the joy of the season leading up to Christmas and New year is typically a time of excitement, especially for children.
People normally spend lots of time planning these celebrations and the excitement leading up to any gathering is often more fun than the event itself! Not having these occasions to look forward to has created a void in the lives of many people all over the world.
Instead, Christmas 2020 was a difficult time for many. It certainly brought up a myriad of personal challenges and negative emotions, particularly for those unable to visit loved ones, or not being able to have relatives home for the holidays.
Here in Spain, the locals are constantly planning their many fiestas. Each town and province has its own special festivals and cultural traditions, especially in the summer months. I have even witnessed the locals take to the streets in very cold weather, just to enjoy the vibe and camaraderie!
The Spaniards have a deep sense of community and they love letting their hair down whenever they can. Having grown used to the culture here, it made the silence of the empty streets this past year even more jarring than it might have been somewhere else.
Reconnect And Recharge Your Soul
What a crazy place the world is right now! First wave, second wave, third wave. New virus, old virus, mutant virus. To be vaccinated, or not? Fear, chaos, anxiety. Misinformation, conflicting information, false information. What do we trust? Who do we turn to for guidance?
And the pandemic is not our only concern. Scientists are warning us that the polar ice caps are melting faster than they had anticipated, as global warming causes climate change. The oceans are drowning in our plastic waste and animal species are going extinct.
Whatever will be next? Will things ever get better, or will they get worse? Are we worse off than our ancestors? Where will it all end? How do we center ourselves in all the chaos and drama, and foster a sense of inner peace and faith amidst all the upheaval?
The one aspect of this world I completely trust is Mother Nature. The Earth Mother, Terra, Tellus. Our beloved Gaia. Like any other maternal energy, she continually finds a way to cope. She readjusts, heals and rejuvenates.
I believe the planet will find a way to heal, restore and recover. Our Earth Mother has the innate power to sustain herself, despite the assault and abuse by her thankless human offspring. Unlike us feeble humans, Mother Nature does not resort to hysterics, fear and panic.
I believe there is a divine understanding that at different times particular events and changes will unfold, as the world evolves its own destiny.
The other aspect of life that I have complete faith in is my soul, my spirit, my higher self, that remains steadfast within me regardless of what goes on in the outside world.