self-sabotage
The Healing Power Of Positive Self-Talk
Most people indulge more in negative self-talk, than positive. But self-talk is not supposed to be negative and overly critical. We are supposed to use it to encourage, empower and motivate ourselves to achieve success and follow our dreams.
Our brain has the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and what is known in hypnosis as the critical factor of mind. This critical factor is that part of our consciousness that checks and filters every through and idea that enters our mind. It is like the gatekeeper or the guardian between the conscious mind and the subconscious. That is how hypnosis works – it is a way to bypass the critical factor so that we can access the subconscious and reprogram it with new information and insights for healing and self-empowerment.
The role of the critical factor is to protect our mind, but this is not always a good thing. Because of the job the critical mind is tasked to do, it tends to be critical of everything. It is unfortunately also that part of our brain that says we are not worthy or deserving, that we cannot do things, or achieve things.
I cannot get the job I really want.
I’m not worthy of a happy, healthy relationship.
I am not smart and pretty enough.
People just don’t like me.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
The one big problem with the critical factor is that it does not always see or hear things the way they really are. It can convince of things that are not true at all. For example, it may you that others are trying to get you fired from a job, when in fact the boss is trying to help you keep your job.
True Love Is About Letting Go
Over the many years of doing psychic readings, I feel the best advice I have ever given clients is to let it be, and let it go. As difficult as it may be sometimes, whenever spirit shows me that toxic love cord connection, while there is still lifelong learning, soul growth and spiritual evolution to be had, then I know that person needs to release the energy that is holding them back and surrender to the flow.
The potential good news is that instead of losing the person we let go, the opposite often happens. Without all the energy attachments of anxiety, fear, obsession and worry, the other person who has been struggling to be separate, independent or free from the one that is holding on, feels the dramatic shift in energy and often change their mind and come around.
There is some real truth to be had from the 1981 rock hit Hold On Loosely by 38 Special that I still love to listen to. That song probably remains popular after all these years, probably because it offers such sensible relationship advice!
People sometimes come to me in turmoil, devastated and in tears, because they think it is over or never going to happen. If I see there is still hope and potential, I advise the client to let go and just go with the flow. The people we love are not always ready when we are. Sometimes we just need to give them a little space and time.
Sooner or later come around if it is meant to be – especially when we no longer spoil them with our constant, undivided attention, emotional coddling and obsessive thoughts. Every time we think of someone they pick up on the energy and begin to take it for granted. So, practicing ‘tough love’ tends to work wonders in the energy realm.
I have sees this advice work for most of my clients over the years, so I am sharing it with you today. If you intuitively feel a strong love cord that connects you with another, and that other person just does not seem to feel it in the same way you do, try just letting go for a while and see what happens. That person often comes around after a time left alone to think, ponder, and maybe go through some personal growth, trials and tribulations. Continue reading
Honor Your Goals And Dreams
Sometimes the goals and dreams we aspire to remain dormant, because it may seem daunting, challenging, or even impossible. But these ambitions deserve their rightful place in our lives. There is certainly no shame in dreaming big, but there is potentially much disappointment in giving up on one’s goals and dreams too easily.
Several modern technologies, such as motion pictures, sound recording, alkaline batteries, the telephone and the electric light bulb, that we take for granted today were once deemed impossible, until Thomas Edison defied all odds and made scientific research the focus of his life.
At just 12 years old, Edison lost hearing in one ear and was nearly deaf in the other ear, but instead of feeling defeated he used this traumatic loss to increase instead his ability to focus. From a tragedy emerged an uncanny gift for unrelenting concentration for hours at a time without distraction.
Edison subsequently honored his dreams and transformed our world with many great inventions that have impacted out lives exponentially. His industrial research lab was established in 1876 and was one of the first laboratories that welcomed teams of scientists and inventors to participate in the process of invention.
The world as we know it today would not exist without the many contributions of Edison and his teams of fellow scientists and researchers. These individuals were true mavericks who honored their goals and dreams. Their unyielding focus drove them to uncover many scientific complexities. By honoring their vision, they harnessed the power of nature to bring light to the world, and so much more.
Are Your Erasing Your Blessings?
Our good deeds and random acts of kindness are never in vain, even when they are not acknowledged or appreciated. Our good deeds are written up on a ‘good deed chalkboard’ in the spirit realm. The unselfish gifts of our time, money, and resources as well as our labors of love bring us many blessings in this lifetime and the next. When we are kind and generous to others, we are also showered with good fortune in return. We know this from the ‘golden rule’ of ‘do unto others’ found in many religions and spiritual traditions.
Buy I have read for many clients over the years who are kindhearted and loving people, but complain about their life being very difficult and deprived. They never have enough money, or they cannot find love, or health and well-being seem to evade them. “I am always helping others, but I get nothing in return,” they might say.
Why is this the case? Why are these generous, caring people not being blessed more often for their good deeds? Well, my guides have made the spiritual cause of this very clear to me. It is my understanding that we do not only add items of charity and compassion to the list of entries on our ‘chalkboard,’ but we also delete or erase them!
You see, when we do a good deed, it gets added to our list of potential ‘return blessings.’ But, if we go around bragging about it, boasting, showing off, telling people how generous or kind we have been, those good deeds become nullified, neutralized, erased. It loses its metaphysical power and spiritual meaning. It can no longer bless us in return.
Ask Spirit To Guide Your Every Step
As babies we learned to walk on our own. We may have had some guidance and support from our parents or caregivers, to protect us from falling, but in the end we mastered it on our own. And once we learned to walk, we could in time advance to running, skipping, jumping, and so on.
Similarly, we must learn to make major life decisions for ourselves. We may receive guidance and support along the way from others, including Spirit, but in the end, we must master our life choices on our own.
One of the major challenges we all face in life is how we choose to manage stress and hardship in our life. Stress is a given. Setbacks happen. Overcoming adversity is part and parcel of our journey in this lifetime. No one can live an entirely peaceful and easy life of serene bliss, without dealing with some drama and chaos from time to time.
But we choose different ways to cope with the daily challenges of life. Some people choose to lead a healthy, uplifting lifestyle, as well as practice spirituality, while others sadly opt for destructive ways to ‘cope,’ such as substance abuse, various forms of addiction, and self-sabotaging behaviors, which only serves to make their troubles worse.
When it comes to spirituality, everyone must choose their own path. It is usually what works best for you personally that is ultimately the best way to go. But some choose to not have any belief system. One thing I have learned in this life is that spirituality is essential.
You don’t have to go it alone. There is a great force, a powerful presence known as God, Source, Universe, Spirit, the Divine that guides and protects us. All we must do is ask.
Another important life lesson I have learned is that no one can truly know what you are personally going through, except yourself. Others will have their ideas and opinions of who you are, and what you may be going through, but none of that really matters.
The Self-Healing Miracle Of Letting Go
In the mid-90s, I had the opportunity to attend The Sedona Method Technique Teacher Training course in Arizona. The experience pierced the core of my being and changed my life forever.
Initially, I was reluctant to go, because I was living in Michigan at the time with my husband and two young daughters. My youngest was around a year old and our older daughter was only five. We had not been living in Michigan very long as we had only recently moved there, and I was terribly worried about leaving them for two weeks!
Nevertheless, I convinced myself to go, because my husband had gone to a previous workshop and raved about how it transformed his life. I sensed it would be good tool to incorporate into my psychic readings and metaphysical work.
When I arrived at the workshop there were attendees from all over the world, including psychiatrists, psychologists, and even scientists. To be honest, I felt a little awkward being thrown in with a bunch of ‘genius nerds’ with various fancy post-graduate degrees. It was a bit intimidating to feel that many of them probably had a much better understanding and formal education on human behavior than I did. However, that did not prevent me from also learning this wonderful technique.
The Sedona Method is based on the concept of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). It is different from intellectual intelligence, because it refers to our ability to recognize and regulate our own emotions, and how skilled we are at using social awareness to find solutions to daily challenges and life problems.
The Sedona Method therefore teaches one how to improve your EQ. In the same way we can go to the gym to strengthen a muscle, or do brain training puzzles to improve our memory, we can also train and develop our emotional intelligence.
Our natural impulse when something makes us sad, angry, or fearful, is to resist and fight back, or shut down emotionally to it. Emotional intelligence requires that we take a step back, take a breath, and release the urge to go with a kneejerk reaction of firing back or shutting down.
Tune Into The Guidance Of Your Emotions
I believe our emotions are an additional ‘sense’ we use as a means of interpreting our life experiences, in the same way the normal five senses enable us to perceive and understand the world around us. Our ‘emotional sense’ help us make decisions about our preferences all the time.
For example, I love chocolate. My sense of taste tells me that chocolate is for me! It’s a very clear and obvious signal from my taste buds to my brain. We receive and process stimuli all the time and our senses help us to ‘make sense’ of that input.
Your emotions are also giving you information about your preferences and if we listen and pay attention, we can gain a lot of guidance from it. Our emotions don’t just come from nowhere. They arise in direct response to stimuli or input, just like our senses do.
I have also heard emotions described as an internal guidance system, or our inner compass, which helps us decide what we want to create more of, and less of, in our life. We sometimes get confused though, because just like the other senses, we have different preferences.
For example, some people love coconut desserts, but I detest then. Not thanks, keep your coconut out of my chocolate! The thing is, I’m not confused about the fact that I don’t like coconut. I also don’t feel I have to change my preference because other people love coconut. And I also don’t force myself to eat it, just to make other people happy.
When one of our five physical senses tells us something we tend to listen, because it’s visceral. We feel it undeniably in the body. Emotions are no different!
When you are heartbroken, do you not feel it in your chest as a physical pain? When you are embarrassed, do your cheeks or ears not become flushed? Or how about when someone you love hugs you so warm and deliciously, all your muscles just ‘melt’ into that person? These are all physical responses the accompany our emotions.