empathy
Context, Context, Context
In the sales and marketing field they often talk of ‘location, location, location’ (no matter how good your product or service is, how successful you are often comes down to location). Perhaps in our communication with others we should think of context, context, and context?
We have entered a period of time in the world that communication is misconstrued, even fake and has more opportunities to be interpreted as confrontational, biased, and not politically correct.
On top of that put an individual’s personal style of communication – introvert, extrovert, analytical, emotional subjective and all the other styles, and the matter becomes more thorny.
Then, add even another layer, such as email and social media, which does not involve the other person being face-to-face.
Now communication becomes even more complex, because body language and the human expression energetically is not a resource available to us to can pick up on the subtle options for interpretation. We will initially respond to the email from our frame of reference, and our reference alone, which is biased by our experiences.
So what do we do? Well, we recognize the importance of ourselves being energy vibration, through which our body communicates consciously and subconsciously with everything in our environment. We acknowledge that our emotions, beliefs and thoughts are complex, inter-connected and influence each situational response in our communication.
Give Yourself The Grace Of Forgiveness
If you are an empath you may believe that forgiveness should be easy for you, or at least easier than it is for others. But I’ve spoken to many empaths and highly sensitive people over the years who all struggle with forgiveness.
One of the main issues with forgiveness for the empath is that we feel another’s emotions intensely, literally as our own. This muddies the waters considerably, because it tends to blur boundaries. Blurred boundaries can often lead to a closed mouth for an empath. Why? Because it is difficult for us, especially in childhood or in romantic relationships, to know where we end and another begins.
It is easy for others to manipulate appropriate boundaries with an empath, or to erase them altogether. All the empath knows is that there is pain, sadness, a sense of frustration, or anger. If you are an empath, then the question becomes are you angry with them, or yourself? Should you have been able to foresee the catastrophe happening, the relationship ending, job imploding, and so on. This leads to self-doubt and the rehashing of incidents that occurred years ago…with no resolution.
In the meantime, every time an empath thinks about the situation, past or present, we feel it…and the cycle continues.
Yes, you are empathic, intuitive, even psychic, but that does not make you immune to being human, neither does it make you all-knowing or all-seeing, especially when it comes to your own life, childhood or relationships.
Small Gestures Of Kindness In A Time Of Cruelty
Many people are feeling anxious or uncertain in recent years with everything that has been happening in the world.
Some are fearful and others stressed or unsure how to act appropriately in these restless times. Some even act out in destructive or dramatic ways, taking their frustration out on others.
It is common knowledge that the digital age and social media has spawned a generation of computer warriors and online bullies who express their insecurities and fears, in often extremely mean and cruel ways, from the comfort of their living rooms and basements.
This savage lack of empathy and decorum has seemingly now spilt over into our streets and neighborhoods too.
It is easier for many to be critical and judgmental, to complain and argue, instead of facing facts, dealing with the truth and seeking lasting solutions.
Often not knowing the entire story, many people choose to see only see one side of things, while telling others off for disagreeing with their limited point of view. The computer has unfortunately given some people a platform to spread strife and hatred, instead of love, hope and kindness.
I pray that more people will strive to seek the truth and learn to look for the good and kind in others. Showing tolerance, patience and kindness is always the better, more open approach. And always remember that if someone attacks you directly, then it often means they are somehow struggling or hurting. It usually serves no real purpose to attack them back. Continue reading
How To Deal With Energy Vampires And Psychic Bullies
Someone or something draining your energy? Most of the time it’s someone whom you are either trying to please, or get approval from, or someone you’re trying to help. You may begin to notice that something changes in your energy field each time you are around this person, or that you feel an imbalance of some sort afterwards. When I say being around a person, this can mean exposure to them through meeting in person, texting, talking over the phone, and even energetically, or psychically.
Energy bullies and psychic vampires are very good sucking the life force right out of you. Unfortunately, you may not notice this is happening, until after the fact. However, once you realize what has happened, identifying it is the first step to proactive healing, regeneration, and protection from allowing it to happen again.
Let’s have a closer look at what is actually taking place during an energy drain. Suppose you have a friend who is always complaining about her life, or often has a negative outlook on every situation she is involved in. This could also be a family member you meet for coffee, or whom you chat with over the phone regularly. And dealing with this person leaves you always energetically drained, deflated or emotionally unsettled.
I’d like to preface this with the fact that we all have times where we need to vent, or reach out for help when we are struggling with something. On the other hand, we also have moments where we need to be the voice of reason for someone else, or have an open mind and heart to listen and truly be there for the people we love and care about. Listening is so important in relationships, but if only one person is talking and one person is listening, over and over again, it is a drain on the listener.
Spiritual Awakening ‘Turns On The Light’
What exactly is a spiritual awakening, and is there a way you can tell if you are having one? Here are some ways to be aware of what is happening to you.
The first sign is usually when you are no longer living in a ‘dream world,’ where you used to see everything through your human ego and you were overly focused on the future and your past.
This is a clear sign that you are becoming more spiritually aware. You have a greater awareness of your individual self and the connection between that and everything else. Things start to come into better focus in your life and make more sense.
When you closely examine various religions and faith traditions, there is usually a common thread that describes this state of heightened awareness as nirvana, enlightenment, or awakening.
This new consciousness happens when you stop being the observer, and instead ask yourself, who is observing?
Many people go through life on ‘autopilot,’ because that is what they were taught, or they simply fell into a routine without giving much thought to who they really are, or what they truly need or desire to make their life meaningful.
Asking such questions about yourself is important for your personal growth and self-realization. It is ‘turning the light on’ so to speak. The first step in growth is always the awareness of the present moment followed by an impulse to change something. Continue reading
Keep Shining Bright In A Darkening World
There’s an old children’s song that says, “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.” Many of us sang it when we were young, never realizing how profound those simple words really are.
As we grow up, we begin to understand that the “light” inside us isn’t just a sweet metaphor. It’s our spirit, our energy, our vibration, our soul essence. It’s who we are at the core.
And in a world that often feels heavy with noise, comparison, and negativity, protecting that inner light and letting it shine anyway, becomes one of the most courageous things we can do.
Each of us carries a unique vibration. Some people move through life weighed down by fear, anger, jealousy, or pain: energies that keep them operating on lower frequencies. Others radiate higher vibrations: love, joy, compassion, and creativity.
You can feel the difference when folks like that enter a room. They don’t need to say a word. Their presence alone speaks volumes. Their light softens the atmosphere and uplifts everyone around them.
But here’s a hard truth that many bright souls learn the hard way: light attracts attention, and not all of it is good and kind.
Those who shine brightly are also unwelcome mirrors to some. Their energy reflects back to others what still needs healing. And for some, that reflection can be very uncomfortable. Continue reading
Learning To Say Yes To Yourself
It is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them.
Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.
But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourself.
Self-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.
Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance.
Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.