self-worth
The Real Truth About Finding Love
I have been doing psychic readings for almost 20 years now, and the one topic that seems to come up most consistently is romantic love. The main issue that comes up all too frequently in these readings is a confusion about what love really is, and how to find true love.
The first thing I need to point out here is that the idea of ‘finding love’ is completely off-base to begin with. The notion that love must be ‘found’ makes very little from a metaphysical and spiritual perspective, and it is often the main reason why some people find their romantic relationships so challenging.
To say that one must ‘find love’ implies that love is somehow missing, lost, or in hiding. It suggests that love is limited and scarce, and that the experience of love is hidden and very complicated to access. The truth is that love is a transcendent, limitless force, and there is only one love that we all have equal access to.
This is another quandary that people have when they are looking to manifest romantic love in their life – they try to separate love into categories. Yes, there are different expressions of love, but in the end there is only one love. And everyone has access to it. Love is less about finding the ‘right circumstances’ and more about aligning with the vibe of love.
So, what is love? Is it ‘unconditional?’ In my view this is just another way of saying that love is limited. It also implies that there are two different forms of love – conditional and unconditional. This makes no sense, because there is only one love and this one love is always unconditional. Love is unconditional acceptance.
In my experience, this is what most of us are really looking for: unconditional acceptance. We experience love when we unconditionally accept ourselves, others, and our circumstances.
How To Manifest What You Really Want
I have, for at least 40 years now, been a deliberate creator, and passionate practitioner of the Law of Attraction. Nevertheless, when I first started working with this fantastic cosmic law, I noticed that I often manifested almost the exact opposite of what I was hoping for!
How could this be, I asked myself? After all, I had read all the books, did the meditations and vision boards, was thinking positively, and even bought the incense. Why wasn’t I getting what I wanted?
The answer came to me in time. It was because I was inadvertently counter-manifesting. This can happen so easily when we attempt to manifest – particularly in one’s early days of learning the art of cosmic ordering.
Okay, so how does one manage to counter-manifest and, more importantly, how do you avoid it?
Align Your Energy
First and foremost, if our energy vibration does not match what we are wanting to attract, we simply cannot draw it towards us. Like attracts like, remember? No amount of visualization or list-making is going to make any difference if we are not in a positive, open state of mind and elevated mood. We have to be ready to welcome whatever it is we have set an intention for.
Therefore, the first golden rule of successful manifestation is to raise your energy vibration with some healthy self-work and personal investment. By doing so, you will begin to attract more good things into your life, rather than drawing those things that you do not want.
Manifesting A Better Life
The best time to work on manifesting better things in your life is when you are alone and everything is quiet around you. Ask the Universe for what you want and what you need in your life.
Writing down your wishes is a good starting point, Make a list of what you want in the next year, then five years. Make a list of the things you desire and be clear about what you want and need. You can ask for anything: a new job, new love, a better relationship with your family, and so on.
Once you have made a request, be aware as you guides will answer you, and guide you in the right direction. The key here is being aware of how they direct you, if you want to ensure you will accomplish your manifesting goals.
You need to be aware how your guides are directing you, or you could miss important opportunities along the way. They place ideas and thoughts in our minds, give us signs, and send us messages all the time. You need to be aware that they are there to help you always – just call on them!
And if your guides want you to learn a lesson, for example, such as ending a relationship that is toxic, in order for you to find a new, better relationship, then that is what you will need to do to accomplish your goal. Manifesting is seldom about simply receiving everything on a silver platter. It often also requires hard work, patience and sacrifices to achieve your end goal. Continue reading
Spirit Says You Can’t Please Everyone
I have learned that people-pleasing is something that one simply cannot do. People must learn to do it for themselves. We cannot please everyone all of the time, and some people will never be satisfied anyway, no matter how much time, energy and love we offer them. They are simply not ever going to be happy, no matter what. Period.
I can think of various situations where one might feel the need to coddle and people-please those we love and care for, but in the end it will only bring us self dis-ease and stress.
For example, the child who tries to please and be there and do everything for the parent. Why is this a bad idea? Well, the parent may give up if their child tries to do everything for them. Especially if they are older and trying to find themselves and re-establish their own life, after taking care of everyone else their whole life.
Sometimes we can smother an ageing parent with kindness, by trying to do too much for them. When we do this, it makes them second guess their ability to do things for themselves. It may even cause them to worry, have anxiety, or become fearful of living.
It is good to be there for one’s elderly parents, however there is a line that can be crossed if we try and do too much and make them feel like they cannot do certain things anymore. Sure, if their driver’s license has been taken from them, for example, and they cannot see well anymore, then obviously driving them places makes sense. But, if they are still able to function normally, then let them!
Let Your Authentic Self Sparkle
Too many relationships are ruined by worrying about what other people think of us. We worry about what people will say, what people will think. I’ve seen many people disconnected from their loved ones in this way, with their only means of continued communication being social, or texting. They’re so afraid of expressing the things they should say, and so on.
If we could just remove our hardened shell and reveal who we really are, and allow our souls to sparkle, be authentic and keep it real with one another, I think we would connect perfectly.
In today’s world we are so brainwashed to think we have to be something we are not. I see so many people communicating, but putting on airs, acting like they are someone they are not, to try and impress, or to sell an idea, or sell themselves as someone else. It can take a toll on the body, mind, spirit. If only we could allow ourselves to show the world who we truly are, and to speak our truth, and sincerely connect with our loved ones, family members, friends, we would all have happier, richer lives.
Sometimes we stop being who we truly are, because the person we communicate with snaps at us, or has a problem with our opinions or how we view the world. When we share our thoughts and opinions freely, these people make us feel like we can’t be who we truly are around them.
Are You Living An Unexamined Life?
According to Socrates, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” This statement is very powerful, yet it has a very simple meaning. What you do not change, does not change you. When your actions remain the same, so do the results. If you cannot examine the things that are eating at you, the things that have gone wrong in your life, and even the things that have gone right, nothing changes.
We must look at our life and go behind the mask that we may be wearing, to cover up the fact that we are vulnerable inside. There are often so many aspects to our life that requires change in order to move forward to a better place.
For example, are you repeatedly settling for the same type of person as a partner and find it constantly failing? Are you going to a dead-end job day in and day out, that you hate so much that merely entering the workspace already makes you despise the day before it even starts? Do you look in the mirror and see things about yourself that makes you miserable?
Take off the mask of pretension and make an effort to change what isn’t working. Examine why you keep repeating the same patterns.
If you are ending up with the same type of person every time, ask yourself why? Are you trying to meet someone in the same way? Are you settling for someone that is not all that you would like, but feel it’s better than to have no one at all? Are you compromising on what you want? If they are not what you seek, cut them loose. They are not going to suddenly change.
Transmuting The Negative Energy Of Self-Sabotage
In many religions and spiritual wisdom traditions we find guidelines on healing and mind-body wellness. Many of these philosophies, in conjunction with modern medicine, can be a great aid for mind, body and soul. In all spiritual traditions there are usually rules or recommendations aimed at the well-being of society as a whole, as well as each individual soul. Many of these teachings warn us of dangers we might find in our own thought, choices and actions. And if we are unaware or careless, a damaging thought or action can turn into a harmful pattern.
Recognizing a damaging thought or behavior pattern in our lives is not easy. We might realize that someone else makes the same mistakes over and over, but it may be difficult to have the same insight about ourselves. We create the imagined walls of our own limitations, and abide by them, without being aware of making this decision. These limiting, destructive thoughts and actions that appear repeatedly in our lives – especially those demeaning, self-sabotaging, angry thoughts – are in essence negative energy vibrations. A few example of such thoughts can be:
I am useless and incompetent.
I am not strong enough.
Nobody cares about me.
I do not deserve better.
I hate myself.