News and Views From The Psychic Access Community

kindness

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Communicating Kindness – A Message From My Guides

click here for a free reading at PsychicAccess.comOur focus today is on being kind to those who are close to you and improve your communication with those you love. Sometimes people are inclined to take their loved ones for granted and speak with them entirely differently than they would speak to a stranger.

It is easy to be kind when showing genuine support and encouragement, but it can be more difficult when giving disagreeable advice, or chastising. Overall, it is much more challenging to be kind when expressing any kind of criticism. To counteract these challenges, we have three recommendations that might help.

Our first proposition is to listen actively. Many people are so compelled to answer while another is speaking that they formulate their responses without actually hearing what is truly being said. They assume that they know where the conversation is going so they miss any nuance or undercurrent within the comments being made.

Staying silent without interrupting can be very challenging, especially when you are eager to expand on positive commentary or ready to disagree with every fiber of your being. It might take an inordinate amount of practice, however, if you can master the art of listening well, people will soon think of you as a great conversationalist.

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Learning To Say Yes To Yourself

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comIt is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them. Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.

But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourselfSelf-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.

Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance. Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.

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The Powerful Gift Of Self-Compassion

Get a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comEmpaths do not only have the capability to discern another person’ suffering or pain. We also have the gift of compassion – the ability, as well as the desire, to mitigate someone else’s pain, or alleviate it all together. The two abilities go hand in hand. I have yet to meet an empath who doesn’t express deep compassion and a sincere desire to mitigate pain and suffering. It’s a wonderful gift that the world could use a lot more of right now.

According to Emma Seppälä, a writer for the Harvard Business Review, compassion is a much better business management tactic than toughness. Research shows that the more compassionate response will get you more powerful results as a business manager.

Compassion inspires loyalty according to a study by Jonathan Haidt of New York University. Haidt found that the more employees looked up to their leaders, and were moved by their compassion or kindness (a state he called elevation), the more loyal they became to them. It follows then that responding with anger or frustration has the opposite effect.

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Friendship And The Empath

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comFriends are a wonderful addition to our lives. In some cases they even take the place of family of origin, and become our chosen family. A healthy friendship is a balanced one – give and take, trust, loyalty, acceptance and truth delivered with compassion. Unfortunately, for the empath, friendship can also be treacherous territory, sometimes rife with debbie downers, energy thieves, and psychic vampires.

There are different levels of friendship, from casual social friendships to those we call ‘best friends.’ These best friends are ones with whom we feel safe sharing our deepest secrets, fears, hopes and dreams.

Social media has made it much easier in recent years to connect with friends. With a click of the keyboard a new friend can be made or an old acquaintance rekindled. Social media sites have even recognized the importance of providing the choice of putting people into the appropriate category, such as people from work or close friends. People can be also unfriended, blocked or reported if they are out of bounds, and what is seen publicly by our friends can be limited.

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When Spiritual Leaders Let Us Down

click here for a free reading at PsychicAccess.comIt is a hard lesson for some of us to learn that people are just people. We are all capable of good and evil. The difference is the choices that are made on how to handle our emotions and feelings.

When you put faith and trust in an individual and are let down, you start to second guess your decisions and lose some faith in yourself to make wise decisions. It can leave a big hole in your heart and create trust issues in the future.

It seems impossible for a person who has done remarkable good deeds to also choose to do bad things. We must realize that all people have temptations in life. Some people can avoid the albatross on their back, while others simply cannot. It takes a very strong person to walk their talk.

The same applies to ‘highly spiritual’ people, because some healers, gurus and spiritual leaders certainly have had their own cross to bear.

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A Story Of Healing

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAcccess.comI asked my mentor how I would get energy healing work. Her answer to me was, “You don’t have to do a thing, they will come to you.” She was really right about this! Healing is a part of my life purpose and the right people seem to find me at the right time.

One of my most memorable healing experiences involved a young girl who only 8 or 9 years old at the time. I was living in a pretty large apartment building at the time, in a not-too-nice part of the city. We lived on the same floor.

Ventilation was not so great in this complex and only a few people had air conditioning, so everyone would leave their doors open in the summer, for a draft of fresh air to come into the stuffy apartments.

Many of the children would play with each other in the hallways. It was always noisy, but in a way it was better than having them play out on the streets without adult supervision. When they did go outside, a mom was always with them, to bring them over to the park that was a few blocks away. Then there are some good parents and some not so good parents, as usually the case is.

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When True Beauty Shines Through

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comI was speaking recently with a friend who prefers to hide from the world. In his words, “I want people to remember me the way I used to look, instead of how I look now.” I couldn’t help but lower my head in that moment. I adore this man in every way. His looks mean nothing to me, for I have seen his heart. To me he is extremely handsome. I wish he felt the same way about himself.

I have thought the same about myself, many times over the years, but not so much anymore. I take pride in my appearance, but I have also come to understand that my looks are not the ‘sum of my parts.’

We live in a very superficial world, where we are made to believe by almost every media and marketing message out there, that as long as you are beautiful or handsome, the world is your oyster. There also doesn’t seem to be any getting away from it. I recall in my own youth flipping through magazines to look at the ‘beautiful people,’ and thinking to myself, their lives must be perfect. Of course, today I know that nothing could be further from the truth.

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