grief
A Letter To My Beloved Dog
Precious Elizabeth, it has been nearly two and a half years since you left your physical vessel to live in another dimension. I know you didn’t want to go and held on long past your time – selflessly, because you had such an enormous love for me that you didn’t want to leave me.
Always my protector, I know you couldn’t imagine that anyone other than you could be as fearless and courageous as you were during all those heartfelt times, throughout the 16 years you took care of me. I adored you and you showed your love every day in countless ways. No matter what you were doing, you always dropped everything, anytime I asked you to come to me.
Well, all but that one time!
We were rocking in the willow chairs on the far end of the portico. It was late in the afternoon, on a perfect spring day. I was relaxing in my chair, and you were asleep in your rocking chair next to mine. A big, brown bear then decided to sniff out the contents of the garbage bin at the other end of the portico. Before I had even spotted the bear, you had already leaped from your chair, apparently having smelled the enormous varmint’s odor. You flew at him as if you had wings, in order to chase him away – so protective of me you were.
The Novel Coronavirus And The New Earth
We have all been going through a very difficult time, dealing with the new coronavirus disease, lockdowns and loss of livelihoods. We have heard many people complain about everyday inconveniences, discomfort, the lack of normality, and even seen some acting nasty towards others in the supermarket.
We have also had many reports of celebrities and public figures safely recovering from Covid-19. But what is seldom acknowledged is the actual suffering and deaths of people who have contracted the virus. I have personally had people around me become sick, and I feel it may promote greater awareness and compassion by bringing some attention to it. Many people are bereaved and currently in mourning, and their grief is not sufficiently respected and acknowledged.
One thing I can assure you from personal experience is that this new disease is no hoax, and certainly no joke either. My own son contracted the virus a while ago. He works as a seafood chef. His restaurant had been crazy busy with all of the take-out orders they have been delivering. A fellow chef, who works the evening shift, came down with this virus, and sadly he passed away due to complications. He was only 37 years old.
Soon after that chef became ill, about 10 days later, my son suddenly also had symptoms, including troubled breathing and a fever. He was home for three weeks. Happy to say, he did recover, but I was a wreck. Before he went back to work, he had to be cleared by the Department of Health.
Tomorrow Will Worry About Itself
Scrolling through my Facebook feed today, I noticed a link to an article titled, “Hell Is Coming.” It featured a graph for the stock market plummeting deeply into the red. Obviously, I did not read the article – the picture and title said enough!
I am sure you have also been noticing an increase in negative messages on social media platforms and in the mainstream news. As a spiritually aware person, I don’t see any intrinsic value in this kind of negative speculation.
Yes, we all must deal with the circumstances that we are currently facing in our world, and it is important to effectively process our feelings along the way. However, when it comes to speculation, there is no difference between a positive speculation and a negative speculation. They are both fantasies conjured in the minds of others, spreading through our adoption of it.
According to some self-proclaimed ‘experts’ the sky is currently falling! Fortunately, I have never taken much stock in conspiracy theories and doomsday soothsayers.
It is true that we are going through a time of unprecedented change, and we are facing challenges that we have never faced before. But, that dramatic article could have easily read, “A Cure For Covid-19 Is Coming” or “This Is A Great Time To Invest In Affordable Stocks.” Why is it that we don’t see many opinions about best-case-scenarios out there?
Gratitude – A Message From My Guides
Sometimes when you are fearful or worried, the last thing you would envision thinking about is gratitude. When you are deep in grief, after the passing of a loved one, being grateful is also not your first thought. When you have lost a job, or have a sick child, the remote idea of gratitude can be the furthest thing from your mind.
However, it is during these times of worry, grief, or fear, that gratitude can be very helpful. If you can focus on even a small success, or a tiny attribute for which you can be grateful, it can make a world of difference to your perspective. Although changing your perspective will not necessarily alter your present circumstance, it can help you cope with your current reality.
Gratitude comes in all shapes and sizes. It can manifest in many forms at any time of the day. It does not have to be something magnificent or worldly, although it certainly can be something momentous, if that is what comes to mind.
Take a few minutes each day to be mindful and appreciative. Your focus can be as simple as having a safe home, or even a nice smile. Or it can be as complex as gradually improving health, or increased financial stability. It might be thoughts of a solid friendship, a dependable baby-sitter, or a full refrigerator. It can involve only yourself, or members of your family. It can encompass your entire neighborhood, your faith, or your workplace.
Shadow Work
Shadow work is the process of learning to speak your fears, anxieties, shame, grief, and rage before Spirit, and having it witnessed by humans. The latter is needed to heal toxic shame and to get you comfortable with being your authentic self in front of other human beings. Shadow work is speaking out whatever is currently uncomfortable for you to say in front of others. For some people shadow work is speaking out about one’s successes, happiness, gains and accomplishments.
Sharing works best when you are specific and refer to date, time, place, and people involved in actual events, as well as describing the specific emotions experienced at the time and describing actual behaviors and actions that occurred.
A shadow work group, like 12-Step programs, provides a safe sacred space and a confidential environment, where others are there to listen and witness your journey of healing, without interfering. Shadow work groups understand that they are just there to witness, and know that the real work is between you and your Higher Power.
Shadow work groups give you a safe place to practice saying things that normally are not spoken, or must be said with careful attention and energy. When you share precarious, painful, fearful or shameful information with such a safe group, you will slowly, with the help of your Higher Power, be able to heal the emotions and energy connected to those issues and events.
In time, instead of those issues and events ruling you, you will have the space to make choices – choices on who to talk to in your life circle about delicate personal matters, as well as when to do it, how to do it, or if it is even safe to share with certain people, or not.
A Message Of Love From The Rainbow Bridge
Recently, my beloved 18-year-old dog needed to be put down. I asked her, and her sister, to hold on until we moved out of state. For some reason, I just felt the need for them to make one more move with me. They had relocated with me wherever I went for the past 18 years, but this was a big one. They were both amazingly healthy, I was just nervous and concerned for their well-being.
Unfortunately, we were scammed in the real estate deal linked to this move, having been told the heater in our new home had been serviced and was in working order. Arriving there, we found out it was actually a very old oil heater. It was cracked, toxic and not working at all.
Keeping my dogs warm, which is essential for old dogs, was near impossible. The house only allowed for one space heater, or the electricity would go out. The dogs wandered around, and we struggled to keep a blanket or heater on them consistently. Soon one of my dogs stopped walking.
My dog was so loved. The pain was intense when she passed. However, she came to me in a dream soon after. In this vision she was young, beautiful, with a clean, shiny coat. She was also warm and comfortable, lying in the sun. There was a glimmering rainbow on her body – a symbol of the Rainbow Bridge that leads to the Other Side. I knew she was telling me she was doing okay now. She was in the light.
Feeling Like You’re Not Good Enough
Sometimes we put our heart and soul into a relationship, only to get cheated on, or dumped for no reason. The main question that usually comes to mind in this type of situation is, “Why am I not good enough?”
Take a moment and consider the relationships of relatives and friends, who have gone through similar a experience. Some people are able to jump right up and move forward, while others sit and wallow in self-doubt and self-loathing – sometimes for years.
Working with many people over the years, one of the biggest eye openers for me has been that it is typically the partner who is left behind, and then struggles to move forward, who compromised the most in the relationship. They usually gave, and gave, and gave, and didn’t receive much in return. Their needs always took a backseat in the relationship. They would sacrifice more and more, until there was nothing left for them to give, while their partner did not change and simply kept using and abusing them.
If you constantly compromise on what you really want from a relationship, the union will at some point simply disintegrate. The other person is never going to magically become someone different. That person you hoped they would become, after you moved in, or after you gave a little more, or after you married them, or after you had a child with them…never shows up. What you see in someone from the start, is simply who they are.