selfishness
Stop Surviving And Start Living
The past three years, I have heard many people say they’re living in ‘survival mode.’ For some it has been about health and personal safety, for others it was isolation and loneliness, or bereavement and grief, or loss of employment and financial security.
It has certainly been an unprecedented, challenging time for our generation. And at times it has indeed been an actual fight for survival, which many tragically did not survive. Many families are still grieving the loss of their loved ones.
Sadly, for some it has also been a time of fearing many things that never happened. It has also been a time that revealed how some folks may be in need of a major ‘privilege check.’ For example, I personally know people who were excessively anxious during the quarantine lockdowns because they were eating too much and gaining weight, or were upset because they could not go to the salon or spa, while there are people in the world who were not even able to feed their families, or worse, had nowhere safe to take shelter.
The global pandemic has indeed been a unique opportunity to reflect on our beliefs, values, and what truly matters to us. Not everyone made the most of this prospect. It seems for some it is still difficult to move beyond the self-defeating mindset of ‘it’s a struggle to survive.’
Yes, life is sometimes definitely hard for all of us. The past three years proved that once again on a global scale. Life can throw major curve balls our way and we all handle things through our personal lens on the world. Some of us are more resilient than others; and some of us more privileged than others. Being in ‘survival mode’ is therefore relative to the individual.
The Truth About Ego And Spirit
Having a strong ego may be just as important as having a strong spirit. However, it can become a problem when we are confused or conflicted between the two, and do not realize that one is tied to the other.
Ego is all about our sense of self. It is about our self-worth, self-belief and how we feel we compare to others. Having a healthy sense of self-esteem is vital for our happiness and well-being.
For example, if someone chooses to stay in a toxic relationship due to their low self or sense of self is essential for our mental and emotional well-being. We must not confuse having a healthy ego with an over-inflated one.
People who have healthy egos do not think in terms of bold versus meek, or overbearing versus subdued. It is not about dominance or submission for them. They only view themselves as being worthy and competent, and strive to improve their life and become the best possible version of themselves. Self-love is not self-righteousness. People with a strong ego can confidently navigate whatever life throws their way without losing their sense of self.
However, those with an over-inflated, toxic ego tend to be arrogant, self-important and more concerned with how others are doing instead of their own achievements. They tend to believe they are so much more worthy and successful than everyone else, and constantly judge others for their mistakes and failures. Big egos are not very ‘healthy’ at all!
Also, when we strive for bigger or better things for ourselves, it is not only a case of satisfying our ego. Spirit operates with a similar agenda. Our soul or spirit is in fact strongly connected to our sense of self. This is why we traditionally say someone is in ‘low spirits,’ meaning they are feeling sad or depressed. But when someone is in ‘good spirits,’ they may have had happy news or some good fortune.
Do You Have A Map For Your Love Journey?
In my experience as a psychic advisor everyone has a unique love journey. Love is a big question for many of my callers, yet the answers from spirit are never exactly the same.
Two of the recurring themes I often find in love and relationship readings are that people have a unique set of dealbreakers, as well as personal love languages. And when these differing needs, wants and expectations are mismatched in a love connection it leads to much disappointment, frustration, heartbreak, and even abuse.
If you have been struggling in the romance department, a good place to start improving your chances of finding or building a lasting love connection is to become more self-aware and conscious of your actual expectations. I find many people lack clarity on this and therefore tend to figure it out by trial and error, which is seldom the best approach.
The first step is to figure out what your love language is. How do you expect to me treated by your partner? How should they ideally behave towards you in your relationship dynamic? If we do not know what love behavior we need from a partner, we are also not able to clearly ask for it. And if we do not ask for what we want and need, we are unlikely to receive it.
For example, some people need lots of verbal affirmation in a relationship, while others value physical touch, or receiving gifts, or acts of kindness, or intellectual stimulation, or emotional support. Some simply require quality time, sharing interests, or having their partner’s full attention from time to time. What is your love language? Continue reading
The Karmic Trap Of Temptation
I love stories that inspires one to look at life differently. I had the pleasure of hearing just such a tale recently, and it was all about temptation.
Imagine Temptation unexpectedly knocking at your door one evening, bearing a gift-wrapped box. He bids you a good day and asks you to invite him into your home. He then offers you the box as a gift and tells you that every time you were to press a button on this box, it will immediately dispense $1,000! You will never have to worry about money again.
But with such an unusually generous gift there is bound to be a catch! Temptation then informs you that every time you press the money box button, a homeless person somewhere in a poverty-stricken community will pass away.
Temptation reassures you however that all people must die sooner or later. And besides, no harm will come to you or your family. You could even use some of the free money to help the disadvantaged in your own community! So, what do you have to lose?
Being human, we are all tempted from time to time. The question is, would you accept such a gift and press the button? Or would you tell Temptation to take the box and leave?
I remember my late mother telling me that when I was about two years old, she kept my baby stroller outside, in the garden, as she had nowhere else to store it when I no longer needed it. It stood there for many weeks, until a struggling young couple knocked on our front door (the woman appeared to be heavily pregnant) and offered to buy the stroller.
Your Life Reflects Your Inner Being
Sometimes people have many issues with others in their life while they neglect to acknowledge that many of these problems are merely a mirror reflection of their inner being. This denial of personal responsibility is often the main cause of conflicts and drama in many people’s lives.
Everyone faces challenges in life. It is how these challenges are managed and released that gives one inner strength and peace. The answers are always within. But when we refuse to go within and face our inner truths, while instead venting our frustration, anger, envy, fear, and other pent-up negative emotions, it just brings so much more of the same crashing down on us.
That person you see with a huge smile on her face…her life is not necessarily all ‘sunshine and roses.’ Maybe she has just chosen to live with joy and gratitude in the present moment, instead of dwelling in the past or obsessing over the future. Maybe she has chosen to release that person or circumstance that had caused her pain or grief, and have chosen to move forward in her life with a knowing that bigger, better blessings are awaiting her on the other side of the pain.
The concept is simple, but the work is difficult. I am just as guilty of this human shortcoming as the next person. In my own life, I have also held onto things for so long that it stunted my spiritual, emotional, romantic, and financial growth. I held on to the resentment, bitterness, and vengeful thoughts, and it stunted me to the point that I found myself stuck in a very dark state of mind for a long, long time.
However, once I realized that both my psychic reading work and energy healing practice are absolutely dependent on clarity, love, compassion, and positive energy, I became determined to find ways to release the past and move forward, without any ill will towards another. Was it easy to find my way back to my inner truth and higher self? No, it was not. Was it worth the effort? Definitely!
Blessed Are The Kind And Helpful
September is Virgo season! What better time to consider becoming a better person by being more compassionate and supportive to others in need? Virgos are known for being helpful, kind, sympathetic, and someone others can lean on.
Virgo happens to be my Sun sign, so I have a bias here. But seriously, nothing is more rewarding than to be of service. Nothing blesses us more than helping to make the world a better place.
We owe it to ourselves and others to be of service. Because once we are truly there for others, we soon begin to notice undeserved joys and blessings filling our wellspring of abundance every day.
When we are kind, helpful and of service to others we begin to draw more beneficial energy to us, and lose track of the need to count money at the table as it comes in. Work is simply fun! Others see our joy and inspire towards similar goals in their own lives.
Those who are unkind or disregard the needs of others, even treating others as their emotional punching bags, eventually have a heavy karmic duty to repay. Being selfish, narcissistic, and cruel are the sources of much misery, anxiety and self-destructive, addictive behaviors in many people’s lives. It simply does not pay to be callous and uncharitable.
Of course, we all have our self-absorbed ‘bad days,’ because none of us are perfect. But we do an inventory at the end of the day, reflecting on how our conduct may have made others feel.
Create a sacred space in your home where you may atone for your missteps; peaceful area where you may recite a daily intention for grace. Equip this space with an essential oil diffuser or incense burner, candles, crystals and gemstones, oracle cards or runes, prayer beads, singing bowls, personal mementos, photos of loved ones, artwork, and other symbolic items.