self-reflection
The Moral Of The Story
Since childhood, I have always loved fables and allegories, as well as the parables in The Bible. Indeed, one of my favorites is The Widow’s Two Mites in Luke 21. As a little girl, I used to listen intently to the story of the poor widow who gave more generously to charity than anyone else in the temple, because she gave all that she had. The life lessons and spiritual wisdom in these stories fascinated me.
Recently, I discovered an amusing tale that deals with both the ego and the need to be pragmatic. Three monks sat on a bankside, each in deep meditation. One of the monks, however, became cold, and this interrupted his ability to meditate. He told the other two that he was heading back to their cabin to find his blanket. Off he went, crossing the stream both ways with no problem. Soon he was back, in next to no time, and as dry as he was when he had left.
A short while later, another monk remembered that he had not left his wet clothes out to dry, so he too needed to head back to the cabin to tend to his laundry. Off he also went. The third monk saw, in amazement, how he easily walked across the water back to the cabin, and when he returned, just like the other monk, he was as dry as he had set off.
Seeing his two fellow monks cross the creek without getting wet infuriated the third monk. “So, you think you are both better than me!” he yelled at them. “Well, I will show you that if you can walk on water, then so can I!”
He ran up to the stream, put his foot on the surface of the water and instantly fell in, waist-deep! As a result, the third monk became even angrier and yet more determined to walk on the water. But time and time again he attempted to cross the creek without getting wet, but to no avail.
Distraught by his many failed attempts, one of the other two monks turned around to his friend and said, “Don’t you think it is time we tell him where those stepping stones are?”
This story did not only make me smile, but it also made me reflect upon my life. Indeed, there have been times when I allowed my ego, needlessly, to stand in the way of my better judgment. Like that third monk, I have also allowed myself to become envious and upset by comparing my own achievements to that of others.
A Sincere Apology Is Good For The Soul
One of the most difficult things in life is knowing when to apologize. It is obvious in some situations, but in others not so much. There are times when we need to weigh out all our options. Is the situation worth an apology, even if you are not the one who created a problem?
Knowing the right time to apologize is critical to the resolution. Was it done intentionally, or was it unintentional? Did the action cause others stress, worry, or pain?
You must also ask yourself if you can live without apologizing the rest of your life. Is it worth losing a friendship, leaving a group, resigning from a job, or not speaking to a family member ever again?
The good old Golden Rule can always come in handy in this dilemma. If you have done something that you would not want done to you, then apologize and seek atonement! Many people find it almost impossible to apologize. They struggle to acknowledge their own part in an argument or wrongdoing.
Some just do not seem to understand their actions were unacceptable, or they always feel that the world is out to get them. There is no compromise in their mind. They always try to twist every situation to make it seem like it is another person’s fault.
For some people, on the other hand, an apology seems to roll off their tongue a little too easily. When a sincere apology is made it must be followed by actions. Actions speak louder than words. By not repeating the offense, for example, it shows a true and sincere apology.
Sometimes all the other person needs to hear is a sincere, “I am sorry.” When we accept responsibility for our actions, we tell others we are sorry for hurting them. It is not always easy, but releasing guilt always is good for the soul.
Everyone Is An Artist
Art is a powerful form of self-expression. It allows us to communicate complex emotions and spiritual concepts through various mediums such as the visual and fine arts, music, dance, acting, creative writing, and so on.
When we are being creative we connect with the subconscious part of ourselves. This can be a powerfully healing experience to help us process and integrate our thoughts, feelings, beliefs and life experiences on a deep level.
When we are children, we don’t have any preconceived ideas about art. If you observe young children, you’ll see this very clearly. They don’t worry about how ‘good’ an artist they are. Most kids just see art as a form of play. They love to draw, or paint, or color, and are typically pretty thrilled with their creations.
So, what happens along the way that we become so self-conscious about our artistic endeavors? It seems to me that at some point most people have had ‘the artist’ within subtly discouraged or silenced. Whatever the case may be,suffice it to say that life takes over at some point and being creative artistically takes a back seat.
“I was never very good at it anyway,” or “I just did it for fun,” are common remarks I’ve heard from people. But what’s wrong with not being very good at something? Especially if it’s fun? Moreover, the benefits of spending time being creative are vast! Art Therapy is growing in popularity and more studies are being done around this modality.
One particular study focused on people with chronic illness or cancer. The researchers looked at the impact visual art activities such as painting, drawing, and pottery had on patients and found that art helped to distract them from thoughts of illness.
Art therapy improved their well-being by decreasing negative emotions and improving positive ones. Depression levels were also reduced, and medical outcomes improved overall. There were also reductions in stress, anxiety, and distress. Further there were improvements in the patients’s spontaneity, expression of their grief, positive identity and social interactions.
The Karmic Fruit Of Our Past Life Seeds
To be the architect of our own destiny is a spiritual concept that has been spoken of for thousands of years. The Vedas call it Karma. The Bible refers to it as ‘reaping what you sow.’
Karma is a Sanskrit word that means action, as well as reaction. It has made its way into our everyday language to represent the good or bad we create in life that will eventually come back to us.
However, the true meaning of karma goes much deeper than that. In this life it does refer to ‘sowing and reaping’ in the short-term, but it also extends into the long-term, over thousands of years and many lifetimes.
The Padma Purana, an ancient Hindu encyclopedic text of spiritual truths, compares karma to seeds that are sown and harvested in due course of time. It explains that every activity we perform bears four kinds of effects. The first is merely a seed, the second is not yet fructified, the third is in the process of being fructified, and the fourth has blossomed and is already mature.
The karma we are experiencing today, are the sweet and sour fruits of the past seeds we have planted, – not only in this lifetime, but also from thousands of years and lifetimes before this life.
Therefore, we may not be able to recognize why certain things are happening that seem out of sync with the efforts and energies we are extending in the now. Similarly, it may sometimes be disheartening and difficult to understand why the desired results of our best endeavors do not appear to be coming to fruition.
To thoroughly resolve these misgivings, a broader scope of our soul’s journey before and beyond this one body and lifespan must be considered. Clarity can come with spiritual vision and higher consciousness.
Keeping My Promise To A Departed Loved One
Sometimes we become so busy and preoccupied in our daily lives that we forget the commitments we made to loved ones, relatives and friends. But this does not only apply to the living. Some of us also forget the promises we make to those that are no longer with us.
Too often we hold the hand of a loved one on their deathbed and promise to look after those they will be leaving behind. They wish for us to look after those they will no longer be able to care for and love in this life. And we promise wholeheartedly to do whatever it is they ask of us in their final moments.
But once they have departed and life returns to normal, we soon forget these promises and serious conversations. Our memories become conveniently selective. We usually don’t mean for this to happen, but life does have a way getting in the way.
I had a shocking reminder recently of my own selective memory in this regard. Several years ago, I got into the habit of journaling about issues in my life that deeply matter to me. Recently, I was not able to sleep and was encouraged by spirit to go through my journal.
So, I sat up at about four o’clock in the morning and randomly opened my journal on the very page where I had written about a promise that I had made to a loved about another person, whom I had a strong dispute with in the past. Being only human, I had some seriously negative feelings towards that individual.
However, I had promised to check in and be supportive to this person, whom I did not like very much at all, on behalf of the person who was in their final hours. At the time, I remember saying that I would “do my best” and that “if I could, I would.”
The promise was much more than just checking in on the relative. It went as far as the very items I was meant to get at the grocery store, as well as things to say to this person when I delivered it. I had however conveniently forgotten about it since, until I discovered the entry in my journal.
Thriving In The Winter Of Our Discontent
Enduring a harsh winter with extreme weather, in the midst of an ongoing pandemic, is not an easy feat. It reminds me of the ‘winter of our discontent’ that Shakespeare refers to in the first line of his play Richard III. This winter-pandemic combo is certainly a ‘double whammy’ that could potentially break any camel’s back! But how we choose to deal with these times will determine how it will serve to improve our lives in the long run.
Winter is actually a great time to think about spiritual and personal self-care, especially in places where there are extreme weather conditions. Where I live, in the state of Maine, the winters weather conditions can be severe, making it a time to just surrender, to give myself permission to rest my body, mind and spirit.
It is a time to go within, to meditate, to read, write, paint, to do things that feed the soul. It is good time to connect deeply with our inner being, the subconscious mind, the higher self. It is a time to retreat, allowing the mind to regroup, and to replenish your body, mind, and spirit. When we take the time to get acquainted with ourselves again, we find truth, wisdom, mental and even physical healing.
If you are going through a snowed-up winter right now where you live, use this time to review your bucket list. Reflect on all that is good about your life. Think about things that are not working for you anymore and the best course of action to move forward. Give yourself time to process it all.
The past year has also been a time of getting to know who we really are and what matters to us most. The global pandemic had some major shocks and surprises in store for those of us who had lost touch with ourselves and the people around us. I have been helping many clients working through these challenges.
For many the pandemic has notably been a time of intense solitude. A time of learning to be comfortable in your own company. In the beginning, the hope was that life would go back to normal in just a few months. But as time has gone on, we have had adjust to the so-called ‘new normal.’