law of detachment
How To Deal With Negativity And Toxic Drama
Many people today feel overwhelmed, angry, frustrated, fearful. This is especially evident online in the social media landscape. Unfortunately, too often this leads to attacks on others, including innocent people and companies.
It can be challenging to know how best to deal with all this toxic negativity. I believe it’s best to approach this issue spiritually, from a metaphysical or energetic standpoint.
Energy, whether positive or negative, grows when we feed it. Consider a plant: in order to thrive, it needs water, sunlight, and nutrients from the earth. If neglected, it will wither. The same principle applies to our interactions with the world around us: by paying attention to something, we feed it with our energy.
This is crucial to remember when dealing with any kind of negativity, both online and in person. To thrive energetically, we must be selective about who and what we pay attention to.
Huna, an ancient Hawaiian spiritual tradition, teaches that energy flows where attention goes. Every time we choose where to direct our energy, we’re making an active choice about what we want to grow in our lives. When we respond to negativity – whether with anger, defensiveness, or frustration – we end up reinforcing the very things we want to avoid. To maintain peace and harmony, huna advises focusing on positive intentions and constructive energy.
By giving toxic energy thieves our attention, we allow their negaivity to take root in our hearts and minds. Feeding negativity or drama only strengthens it, which ultimately affects our own well-being. When we consciously choose to withdraw our energy from negative influences and redirect it to uplifting and positive areas, we create an environment where peace and growth can flourish.
The Spiritual Wisdom Of Letting Go
I sometimes do readings for clients who feel they have to control absolutely everything in their lives. They are rarely calm, rarely happy, always frazzled. There’s a constant tension around them, a palpable anxiety, as if they’re always one step away from a meltdown, or even a complete breakdown.
Many of us have experienced this feeling or seen it in others – the compulsion to control every outcome, every detail, believing that by sheer force of will we can make life bend to our wishes.
But here’s the thing: life has a way of moving on its own, whether we like it or not. And often, the more we try to grasp and hold on, the more things slip out of our control.
A song that often comes to mind when I think about this is the song Let It Be by the Beatles. Let it be, let it be. There will be an answer, let it be. This timeless classic is a simple yet powerful reminder of the peace that can come from stopping to resist and simply allowing things to unfold as they are meant to.
Letting go is not about giving up; it’s about trusting that life has a rhythm, a universal flow, and when we align ourselves with it, life becomes infinitely more peaceful and enjoyable.
In my work as a psychic consultant, I’ve found that those who feel the need to control every aspect of their lives often carry a heavy burden of stress. They struggle to find joy because they are too preoccupied with micromanaging every little detail. Life becomes a series of hurdles and challenges, and instead of going with the flow, they are constantly swimming against the current. It’s exhausting and soul-destroying.
Release Your Attachment To Attract ‘Zen Love’
I have talked to so many people over the years who desperately want someone special to come into their lives, but it never seems to happen for them. They wonder why they can’t connect with anyone, why they never seem to find true and lasting love.
When I do readings for them, Spirit often reveals that the root of the problem is that they either want it too much, or they turn themselves and the other person they are trying to attract into “polar magnets,” pushing each other away instead of being attracted to each other.
In order to attract what you want into your life, you have to let go of any attachment to the outcome, stay clear of any negative emotions, self-sabotage, and limiting beliefs, and essentially allow it to come to you without any obsession or force. I call this attracting “Zen love.
Zen love is finding someone when you are not really looking. It’s when you want it, but you don’t want it so desperately that it just doesn’t happen. I equate it to thinking about someone and then letting go of the thought. It is usually when you let go that they suddenly call you on the phone.
You put out the intention to meet someone special and then you let it go. That is being “in Zen. Not forcing it. Going on with your life and staying positive and just having that inner knowing that everything is going to be okay. That inner knowing without any added force allows good things to come to you.
Meanwhile, if you really want someone special to come into your life, instead of constantly dwelling on it or stressing about it, be proactive and put that wasted energy to better use. Get out more, live wholeheartedly, go places and do things.
Spiritual Maturity Is A Lifelong Journey
What does spiritual maturity mean to you? Every time I ask someone this question, I get all kinds of different answers.
A Baby Boomer I asked said it meant going to church, donating to charities, studying the Bible, and following the Ten Commandments.
When I asked a Gen Z client, she said it meant minding your own business and not caring what others think of you because it is none of your business what they think. She also said she was a Wiccan and didn’t believe in wishing negative energy on others, because she knew it would only come back to her if she did.
I recently asked four people at a social gathering, and they had different opinions on the subject. They were in their 30s and 40s and had a young teenager with them. Interestingly, one thing they all agreed on was that it is spiritually mature to create healthy boundaries with family and friends for your own mental and spiritual well-being. One woman shared, for exxample, that if she hadn’t stopped hanging out with one of her friends, she would have hit rock bottom emotionally.
“I just could not put up with the way she treated me. I used to spend a lot of time stressing about the things she would say and do. I was always overthinking every toxic interaction with her, and our so-called friendship was not good for my mental state,” she explained. “So, for me, spiritual maturity is walking away from those who bring you down.”
Embracing The Magical Art Of Allowing
There is a magical force in the universe – a profound creative essence that flows through all realms, weaving its way through the fabric of existence. This magic essence is not bound by the limits of our understanding nor the constraints of our control. Rather, it emanates from the depths of surrender and trust. This magical power is the sacred art of allowing.
For much of my life, I found myself grappling with the notion of control. I sought to navigate the complexities of existence with a firm grip, believing that my willpower alone could shape the course of my journey. Yet, time and time again, I was met with the harsh reality of resistance — the relentless struggle against the ebb and flow of life’s currents.
It wasn’t until I stumbled upon the profound wisdom of allowing that I began to witness the transformative power of surrender. Allowing is not passive resignation; rather, it is an act of radical acceptance — an invitation to dance with the rhythm of the universe and surrender to the innate flow of existence.
One of the most profound lessons in allowing came to me during a time of immense uncertainty and upheaval in my life. I was at a crossroads, grappling with decisions that made me feel like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. In my desperation to find clarity, I clung to my preconceived notions of how things should unfold, trying to force the puzzle pieces of my life into some semblance of controlled order.
The Law Of Reverse Effect
I remember talking to a very distraught client a few years ago about a man with whom she had been having a secret affair for 24 years. It was a relationship she was very obsessed with and had stubbornly pursued for over two decades, despite many red flags and a great deal of frustration and disappointment along the way.
When this man finally got up the courage to divorce his wife, he left not only his wife, but also his mistress. Within three months, he was in a relationship with someone new and told my client that he never really felt that way about her anyway.
She wanted to know how this could be? She expected with 100% certainty that he would be with her and no one else after the divorce, but the exact opposite happened. After all, she had put a lot of time, effort, energy, love, and devotion into this secret relationship, not to mention all the stress, frustration and drama she had to endure for over two decades.
At the time, this tragic story made me think about some of the free will choices I have made in my own life. There have been times when I, too, have stubbornly expected things to turn out a certain way for me because I pursued it with vigor, only to be devastated when it did not. For example, many years ago, a guy I had a huge crush on and thought was really into me ended up hitting on my best friend while we were out on a date! I guess the moral of the story is to never pursue someone who is not really that into you.
The Spiritual Virtue Of Patience
Patience is considered an essential virtue in most spiritual and religious traditions for several reasons. It is consistent with the core values and teachings of various spiritual paths and belief systems.
Many spiritual practices emphasize the importance of maintaining a state of inner calm in the midst of life’s challenges. Patience is fundamental to achieving inner peace and serenity. Patience helps us maintain a sense of serenity even in the face of extreme adversity.
Patience also enables us to surrender to the universal flow and accept the divine timing of outcomes for our highest good. We are better equipped to accept the divine plan and trust in the unfolding of events and circumstances as they are meant to be. Patience signifies our belief in a higher power and the universal order of all things.
Through patient introspection and self-reflection, we learn to understand our own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, which leads to spiritual growth and self-improvement.
Impatience leads to negative emotions such as anger, frustration, and resentment. By practicing patience, we can better control and manage these emotions, which promotes emotional well-being and spiritual harmony.
Without patience, it is also difficult to develop understanding and empathy for others. Being patient with our own flaws and imperfections, as well as those of others, promotes the spiritual qualities of empathy and kindness.