Intuition
Spirit Says You Can’t Please Everyone
I have learned that people-pleasing is something that one simply cannot do. People must learn to do it for themselves. We cannot please everyone all of the time, and some people will never be satisfied anyway, no matter how much time, energy and love we offer them. They are simply not ever going to be happy, no matter what. Period.
I can think of various situations where one might feel the need to coddle and people-please those we love and care for, but in the end it will only bring us self dis-ease and stress.
For example, the child who tries to please and be there and do everything for the parent. Why is this a bad idea? Well, the parent may give up if their child tries to do everything for them. Especially if they are older and trying to find themselves and re-establish their own life, after taking care of everyone else their whole life.
Sometimes we can smother an ageing parent with kindness, by trying to do too much for them. When we do this, it makes them second guess their ability to do things for themselves. It may even cause them to worry, have anxiety, or become fearful of living.
It is good to be there for one’s elderly parents, however there is a line that can be crossed if we try and do too much and make them feel like they cannot do certain things anymore. Sure, if their driver’s license has been taken from them, for example, and they cannot see well anymore, then obviously driving them places makes sense. But, if they are still able to function normally, then let them!
Protect Your Energy From Toxic People
It is vital to protect ourselves energetically from toxic, negative people. It is essential to our health and well-being. To one degree or another we’ve all have experienced negative, toxic people. These people are sometimes easy to detect, but not always.
The most typical scenario I have encountered is the unkind or rude family member, or distant relative. These are also the most difficult to dealt with, because we often time have no choice but to spend time with them at family events and gatherings. Usually we feel we have no choice in the matter, bit this is actually not true. We do have a choice.
We don’t have to attend every family event. If you know the toxic person is going to be there, you simply don’t have to rise to the occasion. Stop feeling guilty for not attending. Of course, there are usually other family members who make you feel like you have to be there. “It just won’t be Christmas without you,” they might say. But what it really comes down to is your personal well-being. Sure, you may only have to absorb their negative energy once or twice a year, but just like once you have heard something disturbing you can’t ‘unhear’ it, once you have had the experience it is now a part of your memories.
I prefer to be proactive when it comes to managing my energy. And we do have the right to decide who we choose to spend time with, or not. I prefer spending time with those relatives and friends who are compassionate and kind, instead of those who lack tact, are rude, cruel and inconsiderate. I prefer to avoid those who think their opinions are fact, and who are constantly dropping poison upon others with their negative comments. Not okay. Not ever.
Love Yourself, And Don’t Stop Believing
Recently, I had time to reflect on different aspects of my own life and where it was, or wasn’t going. I was starting to feel self-pity creeping up on me, and had to act to shift my energy out of that negative space, as it would trickle off into other areas of my life.
I was supposed to attend a celebration with family on a Wednesday, as well as a gathering with another group of relatives on the following Saturday. But I wasn’t prioritizing my own needs and well-being, and the Universe decided to put an end to my plans.
To cut a long story short, on the Wednesday, instead of going to the party, I landed in the local hospital emergency room, as my knee gave out and I could not walk. The Universe was telling me to rest – to sit down and get my priorities back in order.
My priorities have always been my children and grandchildren, and that hasn’t changed. However, my views on the recurring family drama, with regards who can go see who, and when, and where, and how, has significantly changed. I have decided to let go of always trying to keep the peace, and please everyone. I no longer wish to expose myself to the unnecessary stress and commotion of it all.
I let it go by simply asking my angels to deal on my behalf with all the stuff that I could no longer hold inside and carry, and take it off my shoulders. And yes, it took me a couple days to realize what was needed, but as soon as I did this, the need for walking with a cane started to disappear and the pain and swelling in my knee has been minimal the last couple of days.
When We Fear The Turning Of The Tide
At this time in our world each person must examine their own thoughts and feelings on important issues. You might ask, “What does it matter what I think or feel? I am only one person nobody cares about my opinion!” Well, if everyone felt their voice did not matter, we would never create any change in our world.
It can be very difficult to find your own voice sometimes. To find your voice is to go within and discover your own truth. Each of us have a unique view of the world we live in.
It can be very challenging to speak your mind, especially is a group situation where others think differently. We often remain silent, because we fear rejection if we should stand alone in our beliefs and opinions.
The opinions of others can make us question our own judgment and shake our confidence. We become self-critical. Feelings of fear arise in us. We doubt our ability to express ourselves in a way that others will respect and understand.
The opposite is true also. When things are going along just fine in our personal world, it is often hard to realize and understand that not all people think and feel they way we do. People tend to associate for the most part with others that think and feel the same way.
It is easy to get comfortable in our own world, and avoid what is going on around us. But some point we will have no choice but to pull our head out of the sand. Even if we don’t realize it, the energy of a changing tide does affect all of us.