self-compassion
The Value Of Anger In Manifesting Your Desires
A client recently talked about her struggles with anger and that no matter what she did, she could not get rid of her ‘anger issues’. She was concerned that her anger would inevitably attract and manifest more negativity in her life.
Spirit’s response was that there is value and wisdom in anger. The reality is that sometimes we get smoking hot, furious, explosively angry! It is a human response to events that go against our wishes and desires. If it were not a natural reaction, the experience of anger would not be part of our physical life journey.
The truth is that all negative emotions are actually a dear friend who is there to tell us something. It indicates that we are out of alignment with our Higher Self, Spirit and the Divine. When we experience fear, anxiety or anger it indicates that we are out of alignment and no longer in the flow.
A common “pain-causing” tendency is the stories we tell ourselves about the future. One of the most common narratives I find when working with clients is the one that begins: “I will be happy when…”
We create a story about the fulfilment of certain desires and then focus more on the result or outcome rather than the process and the present moment. When our happiness depends on the future fulfilment of a story, we are no longer in resonance with the present reality and out of alignment with the universal flow. We are no longer living fully, we are merely playing an impatient waiting game.
Navigating Relationship Conflict With Astrology Humor
Navigating a lover’s quarrel can range from simple and fleeting disagreements to complex and time-consuming arguments and feuds.
In the midst of such challenges, a sense of humor can sometimes be a good thing, providing a quick relief valve and a broader perspective on the situation. A little humor can even prevent us from saying or doing things we later regret!
A great source of humor is our zodiac sign. Understanding how our partner’s sign and our own might handle relationship conflict differently can actually help one see the funny, lighter side of even a serious disagreement.
Throughout my years as a psychic reader, I’ve certainly noticed the humor in how different clients handle arguments with their partners based on their signs.
Different zodiac signs have different communication styles. Knowing your partner’s style and your own can help you appreciate the differences and find humor in miscommunication. Each sign also has its flaws, and recognizing them can help you approach conflict with a greater sense of humor. Instead of seeing flaws as insurmountable problems, see them as opportunities for growth and laughter.
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
Many people I know, including myself and several of my clients, have experienced the loss of a child or grandchild.
Losing a grandparent or parent is heartbreaking, but losing a child is absolutely devastating! It is difficult to understand why someone so young is taken before they had a chance to live a full life.
A few years ago, I found some solace for my continuing grief from a very unexpected source.
I am an avid Nascar fan. If you don’t know what Nascar is, it is the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing. Stock car racing is one of the largest spectator sports in America.
A few years ago I watched an interview with one of the masters of this sport, Richard Petty, also known as “The King.” His words struck a deep chord with me.
Richard Petty’s grandson, Adam Petty, was also a racer like his grandfather. He was only 19 when he died in an accident on May 12, 2000 while practicing the sport he loved so much. His car hit the outside wall of the track, killing him instantly.
In the interview I watched, his grandfather spoke of his depression, guilt, grief, and not wanting to get out of bed because he felt he was somehow to blame for encouraging his grandson to pursue this sport that cost him his young life.
The Compassion Of Tough Love
We have an amazing tool within us: our heart. Not only does it keep us alive, but it also allows us to feel deep emotions, such as love and resentment, joy and sadness, achievement and loss, compassion and apathy.
Many people fail to see the power of the heart and what we as humans can do with that power for ourselves and others. The heart is in fact key to our personal and spiritual learning and our soul expansion in this lifetime.
However, many of us who strive to contribute to a better world with the power of our loving hearts have also seen that giving material things, like money, and trying to help those who refuse to help themselves, does not cure the suffering in the world. It usually only puts a band aid on the underlying problems and in time it just returns as additional problems.
We all have our own karmic lessons, and if not learned it becomes a recurring issue until we finally learn to fix it, learn from it, and move forward. Then it is no more a lesson, but a wisdom.
It is also true that we can get in the way of others learning their lessons. Sometimes we jump in too quickly or end up taking on their burden, only to find it happening again and again. Then all our efforts and sacrifice were in vain.
Transform Your Life With Sustainable Resolutions
Every new year, I hear my clients complain about what they hope to change about themselves, what they want to change about themselves, or what they should be changing about themselves.
I then ask them why they are not claiming their power to change right now?
You do not have to wait until the New Year or some other major life event to make a change in your life. Once you’ve decided on a new path or course of action, the key is to stick with it for the long haul, taking small steps every day.
The Japanese call this kaizen, a philosophical concept that emphasizes continuous improvement, often in small increments. The idea is that by making consistent progress, even if it is just a little bit each day, you can eventually achieve significant results.
Sustainability should be the ultimate goal of whatever you decide to change in your life. While New Year’s resolutions are all noble and lofty, you have to acknowledge the inherent resistances and blockages you carry within and agree to be patient with yourself in order to ultimately get there.
I’m still working on some New Year’s resolutions I made in 2016. Do I look back in horror and say, “Why is it taking so long?” or “I really should be doing better!” Sometimes, yes! Do I use that as an excuse to backslide, fall off the wagon, or throw in the towel? Not at all, mostly because I’ve come to realize that if I hadn’t decided years ago to make those resolutions to make powerful changes in my life, I’d still be where I was, or worse. I’d be living a life of regret, not progress.
Maybe It’s Time To Let Go Of The Baggage
Most people who make New Year’s resolutions don’t keep them. Every year we tell ourselves it’s time to move on, to change, to leave negative people and influences in the past, and yet we rarely follow through. We wonder if it is even possible to let go of the things that hold us back?
Yes, it certainly is!
The first step is to simply make the decision that it’s time to let go of all the old baggage in your life. To do this we must be completely honest about what’s really holding us back and why it’s so difficult to let go. This is sometimes best done with the help of a coach or mentor, such as a therapist, spiritual advisor or trusted friend, who will listen and guide you objectively.
Until we have a true understanding of all our baggage and our own part in it, it will never go away. We must also be gentle and accepting as we travel this path. The past can never be undone, but it can be learned from and it can help us move into a better future.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results each time.” It’s within our power to change negative thinking patterns and habits. Good habits take at least a month to wire into our brains. Start with affirmations, practice better self-care, and stop obsessing about things you can’t change or control. Over time, you’ll find yourself making better decisions that aren’t tainted by the past.
How To Beat The Holiday Blues This Year!
The holidays can be a very difficult and depressing time for some people. It can trigger unresolved emotions from childhood, unhealed trauma from past relationships, or unfinished grief from lost loved ones.
It can also make you feel more lonely, disconnected, and isolated than usual.
Especially for people struggling with existing mental health conditions such as anxiety or depression, their symptoms may worsen during the holidays due to increased stress, social demands, and cultural triggers.
But there are ways to beat the holiday blues and overcome sadness, depression, or low spirits during “the season to be jolly.” There are ways you can take back your power and improve your mood and overall well-being.
First, it is necessary to determine what is causing you to not feel the holiday cheer that everyone else seems to be experiencing.
Several factors can contribute to negative, gloomy thoughts and feelings during this time of year. A common trigger for many of us is that mainstream holiday traditions tend to emphasize spending time with loved ones and family, which can exacerbate feelings of loneliness for those who are socially isolated or have lost loved ones. This isolation can be particularly acute for those of us who live far from family or have strained relationships with them.