life experience
How To Overcome Negative Thought Patterns
There are times when one may be feeling very serene, and completely at peace with ourselves and the world. One may even be feeling highly satisfied with the spiritual growth and personal healing you have accomplished thus far. Then, quite unexpectedly, you lose your sense of alignment. You suddenly feel ‘disconnected’ from the source of our being.
This feeling is especially triggered when one feels overwhelmed by life’s responsibilities, or the constant demands of others. And once we slip into this negative state of mind, many deeply buried, unpleasant memories tend to emerge in our consciousness in the form of haunting ‘flashbacks.’
I recently heard a friend referring to this experience as cognitive distortion. We can so easily begin to catastrophize, and expect the ‘other shoe to drop,’ once our anxiety level becomes this amplified. The mind is powerful and under these circumstances we tend to indulge in a lot of ‘what if’ thinking. The mind races, imagining all the worst case scenarios as potential outcomes.
This kind of catastrophic thinking typically takes our mind into two directions. Firstly, it puts a truly negative spin on the current situation. And secondly, it causes us to anticipate all the many, many things that could possibly go wrong in the future.
Polarized thinking is another problem for some of us. This thought pattern is when we only see things in terms of right or wrong, and this can lead to setting unachievable standards for ourselves and others, as well as send our stress levels through the roof! Polarized thinking crops up when we find ourselves basing our hopes and expectations on, for example, getting that dream job, impressing other people, finding our soulmate, becoming famous, and so on.
Our Loved Ones In The Realm Next Door
Someone very close to me recently had an unusual near-death experience. It was a profound event she says she will never forget, and it reminded me of the fact that our loved ones are always around us, whether we believe it, or not.
My dear friend had to go into the hospital for an iron infusion. She was severely deficient and the iron supplements she had been taking, weren’t doing the trick. Not looking forward to the procedure, and having been told that she could have an adverse reaction to the infusion, she was not at all excited to go to the emergency room.
Soon after they started the infusion, she passed out! But this was more than just her fainting. While she was in this altered state of consciousness, she had repeated encounters with both her deceased parents. She felt their warm embrace comforting her and telling her all was going to be okay, and not to worry.
“We are both with you, we love you and we are here protecting you,” they told her. “It is not your time, you still have things you have to do and people around you who love you, and care a lot about you, and need you.”
The experience was quite traumatic for my friend. She came to twice, and then passed out again. Three times in total. Being that she is over 70, and considered very weak for her age, the medical staff were concerned for her safety. Thankfully, all went well in the end. Today she feels much stronger and has more energy, as her blood was build back up thanks to the iron infusion. But she says she doesn’t think she will be getting such an infusion again anytime soon!
My Catalyst Moment
Over thirty years ago, I faced a major crossroads in my life, and it became a monumental turning point. It was the catalyst moment that ultimately led me into full-time service as a psychic oracle and healer. I did not choose this path – it chose me. And today, I am beyond grateful for this calling.
In those days I had just about everything you can imagine to make me ‘happy.’ I was a highly successful, special risk broker for a prominent insurance company in London. I was one of only two women at the time to hold that distinction. I also attracted and owned all of the opulent trappings of success that came with such a distinguished position – the material things and luxuries our culture teaches us is supposed to make us happy and fulfilled.
I was proud of my work and had plenty of interesting things to do every day, both socially and professionally. But there remained persistent doubts and questions. Is there something more? Why wasn’t I satisfied? Why did I feel so restless and discontent?
You see, I knew, deep in my heart, I was not living the life that was calling me. And, boy, was it calling! It woke me up in the middle of the night. It created a lot of agitation and self-doubt. Why was I feeling this way? Is there something wrong with me? I even started questioning my sanity. I had everything I thought would make me happy. So, what was lacking? Why did I keep feeling that there was something missing? And, where would I find it?
Take Negative Emotions All The Way Home
When life gets tough or something happens to upset me, whether it be big or small, I make it a point to become very quiet and mindful. I do this to get clear, so that I can see all sides of a situation, as well as stay open to learning any possible spiritual lessons that are being offered.
Typically, there’s a strong emotion linked to what has occurred. If I can allow it to be there in a calm way, I can start to see the situation from a clearer perspective.
If the situation involves being hurt, for example, I take some time out – long enough to not hastily defend myself or problem-solve. Doing this creates an opening where the Divine can step in and take over.
I like to think of it as having a weight on me and imagining a group of cherub angels coming along to lift the heavy burden emotions I’m experiencing. They then take it from me and fly away. Though this is just a visualization, there is great relief at times in turning situations over to a higher power.
I have noticed, as I get older, that certain things that used to bother me so much, and would take weeks or months to get over, I now release in just a day, or even a couple of hours. This is because I no longer allow myself to be overwhelmed by the emotion in the moment.
I believe what helps to accomplish this is going beyond the difficult emotion, into a realm or a land less frequented. I refer to is as “taking it all the way home.” What I mean by this is to examine what it is I am most afraid of.
Guidelines For Spiritual Growth
Spirituality is a wide-ranging concept with many diverse perspectives. In essence it is the process through which our inner being seeks to relate to something bigger than ourselves. It is the search for the meaning and purpose of our human existence. Spirituality is about our soul or spirit, and the unseen realms, as opposed to material things and physical life. It is also the life-long pursuit of inner peace, unconditional love, and existential wisdom and understanding.
Many people believe that the secret to spiritual growth and development can only be found in a book, a lecture, dogmatic belief system, or some other product or service that will magically unlock the doors to spiritual insight, happiness, joy and fulfillment. However, spirituality is a unique, personal path that each of us can explore on our own, from within. The following guidelines may be helpful on your journey towards spiritual fulfillment.
Reflection
The first step in personal spiritual growth is reflecting on your life journey. To be spiritual is to be questioning and inquisitive. Spiritual growth is a process of constantly learning and improving. One must be willing to open yourself to personal and spiritual growth, and by doing this your world opens up and things become less scary.
Holding on to past events keeps us from experiencing new adventures, and the emotional baggage will only weigh you down. Accept your past mistakes and learn from them. Reflect on what changes need to happen for you to move forward.
We are all teachers. We are either teaching someone, or they are teaching us – both good and bad. Learn from your experiences and move on with life.
The Linear Time Trap Of The Past
It is said we do not know what time is. We also do not know where it comes from, and we definitely do not know where it goes! And according to Albert Einstein, the famous physicist, the distinction between past, present and future is only an illusion, because space and time are fluid. Yes, such are the mysteries of the fourth dimension.
Linear time may be an illusion in scientific terms, but in our daily life it is still the time that we cannot stop or control. That clock keeps on ticking, and the cycles of night and day will forever come and go. Every morning, the sun shall continue to rise, and the Earth will progress on its annual journey around the Sun.
However, our experience of time goes beyond the everyday linear. Did you know that there is also such a thing as spiritual time?
Surely you have observed that whenever you are doing something really unpleasant or boring, time can certainly drag on. For example, I recently had to wait for some medical tests that would determine whether or not I was developing breast cancer. Thankfully, the tests came back negative, but I remember thinking of those awful four weeks of hospital visits and biopsies as being the ‘longest month of my life!’
On the other hand, time can also pass so quickly whenever we are having a good time and enjoying ourselves. Why would this be? Well, when you are really delighted with something, your soul, your spirit, your higher self becomes fully engaged in the pleasant experience you are having. In simple terms, when this happens, you literally lose track of linear, reality time itself and your personal, spiritual time shifts to the front. This is the time of your true spiritual self.
Dragging A ‘Knapsack Of Irrelevance’
Reading for a client recently revealed her toxic work environment, and how one co-worker in particular was making things very unpleasant for her at the office. It reminded me of a short-lived, but very unpleasant working situation I found myself in years ago.
I was scheduled to work with a woman for a couple of weeks who had an extremely negative attitude and was having a profound effect on me. I shared this unpleasant situation with my boyfriend at the time, and his view was that I was just carrying around a ‘knapsack of irrelevance.’
I was so upset! How could he even think that? However, he did give me some food for thought when he then also said, “Just consider how you will think about this situation in a few years from now. How much will it matter then?”
Well, that did help to put things into perspective. And guess what? Just as he predicted, I forgot all about it until this recent reading with my client! Yes, he was correct. After all the years, remembering that brief work situation made me realize that it never had any major relevance or importance to my life. Stressing and worrying about it was indeed just a waste of time and energy.
I met this particular ex-boyfriend in the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). He was very well-versed in the twelve steps and other tools helpful in achieving and maintaining sobriety. He also gave me an Alcoholics Anonymous pamphlet, which I have to this day, which reads: