twin flame
Healing The Pain Of Losing Your Beloved
Understanding the true nature of our soul journey, how does one cope with the pain of physical separation when our loved ones leave the physical form? There is no easy way to cope with the grief of separation from a beloved. It opens the water ways of deep emotion that rise and fall like the waves on the sea.
Even in the super-excellent times of Radha and Krishna, the supreme divine feminine and masculine described in the ancient spiritual texts of Srimad-Bhagavatam, waves of love in separation were displayed and described to the ultimate pure degree. These transcendental writings identifies the eternal realm of divine love as the original clear source of all that we experience here in a dimly reflected form, including the pain of being parted from the physical presence of a dear soulmate.
So, what can we learn from this source that we can mirror in undergoing this heart aching distress in our own lives?
The first lesson we can take away from the transcendental example is that pain in separation is a gift of love. It arises in direct proportion to the depth of the soul-to-soul connection shared between two people. Thus, every pang, however painful, is like an ornament decorating the heart with the truth of that blessed union. It embodies a reminder not only of the person, but of the great treasure we were fortunate to hold in our arms…and still in our hearts. It invites us to feel grateful for the rare opportunity we had received to experience such deep love in this world. Continue reading
The Inevitable Misery Of Clinging To Your Partner
If you wonder how a life of destruction, misery and unhappiness is most easily produced, then the answer is: through clinging. Whatever we won’t let go of, or ease up on, will eventually choke us to death, or vice versa.
Immediately note here how something in us resists these words. Some anxious, unresolved, threatened feeling rears its ugly head in defiance, declaring we will not release or ‘let go’ of anything or anyone we don’t want to. Ah! But we will, because nothing lasts forever – least of all those relationships we so dearly depend upon, or identify with, for our happiness and survival.
The reason we are often so defensive about letting go of a failed relationship, is because the seeds of doubt have usually begun to sprout, bringing with them a host of trees which bear fruit of uncertainty. We were originally driven by the thrill of a newfound excitement, but that thrill has slowly begun to change into a dreaded familiarity.
With familiarity the edges of contempt soon show themselves in minuscule ways in our discontent. We try to smile more broadly, laugh a little harder, with added sincerity, but the prickly thorns have begun the wear and tear the fabric of our make-believe, bliss-soaked relationship.
Desire always precedes the anxiety of being able to maintain a relationship’s relevant importance. Uncontrolled, unconscious desire changes frequently, without our approval or consent. We can easily recognize it when we have the inclination to change things in other people. Misery soon follows, as we allow expectation to enter the frame of reference, with our subtle demands. No good.
Soulmate Love Requires Patience, Hope and Perseverance
Should I wait for him? This is a question I have been asked many times in my work. Especially when there is a deep, strong soul-to-soul love, with a sense of eternity and meaning to it, this question naturally arises when such partners are parted.
The answer, I find, is within. It is not a matter of should or shouldn’t, good or bad, right or wrong, nor even a matter of the outcome. It is a matter of heart. And it is a very individual choice.
An intuitive reading can support, but not substitute the process of discovering such a personal choice. As an empathic intuitive, for example, I can offer you a description of the energy I feel around your relationship situation, to provide you with information that may help you discern. I can also support you in trusting your own heart, and then in moving forward accordingly.
But the ultimate answer always lays within your own love and desires. From my experience of love in separation, I have learned that the path of patience, if chosen, will call for a profound degree of it, along with several stepping stones of spiritual qualities and concepts to uphold it.
Love between souls is a spiritual exchange. It steps back and views the beloved through the lens of eternity. It sees the individual spirit soul – the birthless, deathless being within – who is on an evolutionary journey, passing through human experience in this world.
The Truth About Long-Lasting Relationships
The fact that we struggle to navigate our romantic relationships remains a topic of never-ending debate. Many of us are involved, entangled, enmeshed in some type of complicated, and sometimes confusing, relationship. Whether these relationships are satisfying or not, our mental, physical, emotional state is usually somewhat determined, or at least influenced by the nature and health of these precarious unions.
Many of us involved in some form of romantic relationship, often feel the constant tug and pull of its nebulous contradictions and challenges. Though the words are not always verbally expressed, the ensuing tension often results from a lack of intimacy that can only be created through authenticity and open communication.
Most people, however, interpret sexual closeness as the culminating epitome of true intimacy. But unless one is also able to openly communicate and authentically connect on other levels, even the most dazzling sex life will fizzle out eventually – and often sooner than later.
Sex alone never sustains a meaningful, long-lasting relationship! No matter how exciting or mutually satisfying it may be. Using sex as a clear, reinforcing sign that a relationship is going to endure, is never a reliable barometer.
Finding Love With Online Dating
I believe in the power of romance and love. I believe in soulmates, synchronicity, and love at first sight. I could not practice my job properly if I did not believe in such things. And is this not what many of us are dreaming about? The knight in the shiny armor on a white steed, coming to save the damsel from her misery?
So, let’s talk about online dating.
We all know the dangers and the threats of dating online. Many of us know someone who was deceived, or even got scammed. It can also be a very frustrating or disappointing process. But it is not impossible to meet your soulmate online. I personally have witnessed many success stories. But I also know of some incidents of ‘love makes you blind,’ as well as lonely, bankrupt and insecure.
I often get asked to do a reading about a person someone met online. It is important to be cautious and careful. For example, if you only connected with somebody online, you have not actually met anyone yet. The best way to be sure is to actually meet them in person, or at least have a video call with them. It is best to meet the person in a public place first. Inform your friends or family where and when you are to meet, and who the person is.
The Truth About ‘Twin Flames’
If you are confused about the spiritual concept of ‘twin flames’ and ‘soulmates,’ you’re not alone. Perhaps, I can shed some light on this very misunderstood subject.
I could never have understood or imagined it myself either, until I found myself going through the ‘madness’ myself, over 20 years ago. If you have never gone through a so-called twin flame experience, you won’t understand it. It’s a romantic connection like no other! But the biggest lesson I learned for it is that it is also no reason to stay in a toxic relationship.
My twin flame relationship was highly important to me, regardless of it being a one-way street. I meant so much to me that I ended up travelling to Mumbai, India, to obtain advice and assistance from a highly skilled gurugi (spiritual teacher). I was convinced that she could fix things for me, since my relationship was surely ‘meant to be.’
The feelings were so intense, for me, anyway. And, I was convinced that my beloved’s feelings for me were of the same exquisite level. In fact, I had no idea or any way of gauging otherwise. The ultimate fantasy, right!
Further, I thought that it was up to me to heal this person that had captured my heart. It seemed to me the more painful the relationship was, the more healing I had to do for him. As a result, I carried the entire relationship energetically, and emotionally.
For example, although I had always been a passionate ‘foodie,’ I began to look anorexic, as I continued on this healing mission for him. I was eating plenty of good food all the time, but I realize now that I was so drained, as a result of giving him so much of my energy, that it wouldn’t have mattered what, or how much I ate.
Is Your ‘Soulmate’ A Narcissistic Predator?
He must be your soulmate, or twin flame, because he knows you so well. He has taught you so many things about yourself. Surely, this means he is ‘the one.’ I don’t think so. You might want to say something like this regarding your therapist, teacher or healer, but even then I would still be careful.
If you are constantly looking for someone to ‘get’ you, or yearning to be understood on a ‘deeper level,’ you might as well have a target on your back that says: prey. If you are so wounded and empty that you need to be constantly affirmed by another, then you need some serious healing, prolonged growth work on your Self, your inner child and your relationship with your Higher Self and Source.
Even when working with a spiritual teacher or healer, if they are doing most of the work for you, telling you all about your Self, then they are merely telling you a narrative, a story. Stories don’t solve problems, or heal. Information or data does not heal. It can point you in the right direction, but ultimately information does not heal, action does.
So if your healer, teacher, therapist or counselor is telling you all about your Self and that is all they are doing, you might want to reconsider. Reevaluate how much help you are actually getting. It is only a mental boost to receive this kind of information. In other words, your brain feels temporarily happy with the excitement of words. But it is ‘drug’ that will wear off quickly. Soon, you will then trotting off in search of another high.