decisions
To Hate Is A Self-Destructive Choice
When I was in middle school, around the age of 13 or so, I remember an older, more popular girl used to constantly bully me. I also remember coming home from school and telling my mother about it. I told my mother that I hated that girl, but she very sternly said, “Oh no, you don’t hate anyone!”
I defiantly replied, “Oh yes, I do!”
My mother then patiently replied, “Okay, well if you are going to insist on hating her, please go and do it somewhere else, young lady. I do not want to hear about it anymore!”
She never explained to me why she felt it was inappropriate for me to hate anyone. I didn’t figure this out until much later in my life.
My own daughter is now also a teenager and she sometimes comes home from school with similar complaints. A girl at school has been spreading false rumors about her. Just like I did all those years ago, my daughter also told me how she hated this girl. And I replied the same way my mother did, except I also explained that hate only breeds more hate.
To hate someone or something only hurts you, no one else. My daughter hating this person she feels has wronged her, will only cause her to hurt herself more with negative emotion, every time she thinks about this person. Every time she tells a friend or family member about this girl, she will be refueling her own negative fire. Thus, she will only end up hurting herself more.
The other girl does not feel every occasion my daughter is upset, or reliving the hurtful situation that occurred. In reality, my daughter is punishing herself every time she thinks about how this person wronged her. This is what we all tend to do, when we find ourselves in similar or hurtful situations.
Surrendering Your Free Will To Divine Intervention
To have free will means to have choices, to act at your own discretion. Choices in what? Well, in everything. From eating ice cream for breakfast, to establishing a humanitarian mission to support the homeless.
The ice cream is a simple choice, while the non-profit requires significant planning, a vision, a passion and purpose, as well as personal sacrifices, effort and action.
But both will have consequences. Eating deserts for breakfast may lead to weight gain and even long-term health problems. Helping the homeless will make the world a better, safer and happier place.
Between these two extreme examples, there are a myriad of life paths, choices, decisions, options, and potential experiences. It is what we call life and relationships. In all these possibilities the power of free will always exists.
You also have the free will choice in life of taking things too personally, being too controlling or demanding, being lazy or discontented, playing the victim…or living your life with courage, joy and gratitude.
One of the most prevalent challenges many people is their unwillingness to accept the principles of co-creation. To live a happier, more peaceful life we have to accept that just because we have free will in our own life choices, the world we live in is a co-creation. We do not only choose for ourselves, but we also choose everyday along with others. Every day is an act of co-creation. And not everyone always chooses the same things. We must learn to accept this.
Go with the flow? Never, you might say, I need to be always in control. I call the shots! The paradigm shift of realizing that I am spirit in a physical body is what changed it for me. Consider what your life might look like today had you more often simply trusted the Divine, Universe, God, Creator, Spirit, Source to let things unfold for the greater good, at the right time and in the right way? Well, it’s never too late to try. The results just might surprise you.
Do You Follow Your Head, Or Your Heart?
As a practicing astrologer, I often assist clients who are facing the head versus heart dilemma. Should they go with what their head is telling them, or should they follow their heart?
“My head tells me he’s so perfect for me. He is my dream guy on paper, ticks every box. He has a successful career, earns a solid income. He is someone my kids would love, the male role-model they so desperately need,” a client recently explained.
“But my heart feels so hesitant, like its beating for someone else I haven’t met yet. He is a great guy, but there no butterflies. It doesn’t make sense. I don’t understand why my heart is yearning for someone different?” she lamented.
“I can’t afford to be picky and my friends and family tell me I’m crazy to even question this incredible guy who seems to tick all the right boxes, but doesn’t put a flutter in my heart!”
The question is indeed, why would one trust an illogical feeling that can’t be quantified and measured using the neat little pros and cons list of the mind? In my Astrology practice, I have see this conundrum play out many times.
Interestingly, I find this vexing situation is often related to a Mercury Square Moon aspect in someone’s chart. Such a person will often take one side over the other, usually the head over the heart, and this habitual battle can result in a lifelong pattern of bad choices.
Culturally we’ve also been conditioned to always choose reason over feelings. And what others think often also factors too highly in a personal choice that’s best made selfishly. In my opinion, relationships are one of the few areas in life where we get to be selfish, because if we choose someone who will not make us happy, everyone will suffer in the end.
We are often told ‘trust our gut’ for good reason. Your intuition or inner guidance system knows far more than you do! But like a muscle, we must build it up, we must work it, flex it, to clearly register the signals it’s sending us.
Making The Most Of This Life, In This World!
I remember watching with fascination Sliding Doors starring Gwyneth Paltrow. In this film she finds herself in two parallel worlds with two very different realities that result from her choices and decisions.
Seeing this film prompted me to explore the fascinating subject of parallel worlds. According to physics, the existence of parallel worlds or a multiverse is a genuine possibility.
A parallel world is believed to be another world that exists alongside this one, yet it is undetectable to and independent of this world. It has also been suggested that another version of you could exist in one of these alternate realities, while there may other parallel worlds where you do not exist at all.
Could it be that each choice or decision we make in this world creates a very different reality in another world? For example, in another world, instead of going to your high school prom back in 1980, where you fell in love with Frank and later married him; you didn’t go to the prom that night, Frank never existed, and you ended up never getting married.
There are various schools of thought that this Universe is not singular – but one of many. One theory is that the Universe in which we live is infinite. However, matter can only rearrange itself up to a finite point and then it has to start repeating itself, thus creating Universe after Universe.
Another viewpoint is that there are multiple universes that all contain a planet Earth and more doppelgänger replicas of you! Furthermore, in these other worlds, you have to make different decisions – just like Gwyneth Paltrow has to decide in Sliding Doors if she is going to get on the train, or not, leading to different outcomes in each parallel life.
Some physicists theorize that the Big Bang, which may have given rise to the birth of the Universe, was not a one-off event. It may have prompted other Big Bangs giving birth to other Universes.
Let Your Spiritual Gifts Flow Naturally
We are all metaphysical beings born with a variety of spiritual gifts. Some of us intuitively know how to use our special gifts early in our life, while others may have difficulty embracing them.
Expressing our natural spiritual gifts takes a certain mindset. The key is to not try too hard. That’s right! No blood, sweat or tears are necessary. Just relax, surround yourself with calm and positivity, and clear your mind. Our metaphysical gifts and psychic talents flow naturally when we don’t try to force it.
We experience intuitions, signs and synchronicities every day, but often we do not pay enough attention. You may have felt someone was coming to visit today, or a vision of that person flashed through your mind, and then you bump into them later.
Maybe you smelled a sweet scent that reminded you of someone, or you knew the phone was going to ring, and it just did. We may have a feeling not to drive a certain way home today, and later discover that we missed a major traffic jam. We all have an inner voice that talks to us when we have important choices or decisions to make.
Some people have won the lottery, after the numbers just ‘popped into their mind.’ We all have dreams that reveal important information to us about the past, present or future. Some of us feel sadness or despair when we walk by strangers. We feel soul connections with some people we meet for the first time.
So, you see, we are all gifted, but we just need practice learning how to not try so hard, and instead just get comfortable and attuned with our spiritual self.
Divine Timing And Psychic Predictions
During a psychic reading it is not unusual for the question to arise, “When will this happen?” The human mind is naturally geared towards anticipating, planning, strategizing and looking for patterns and solutions. Asking ‘when’ supports our goal to ensure progress in the hopes of achievement.
The desire to know or estimate when something will occur can be traced as far back as ancient times, when our ancestors relied upon the movement of the planets and changing seasons for planting seeds, harvesting crops, stockpiling food, and so on.
In the physical world we have schedules to adhere to these days, and our time is dictated every day by clocks, watches and time zones. However, in the spirit realm there is no such thing as ‘time’ as we know it.
What if all clocks were obliterated and we had no more calendars saying which day of the week it is? Some metaphysicians and spiritualists believe that humanity invented what we know as ‘time’ and ‘dates’ as a means to measure the progress of our species.
Psychics can see into the future of probable outcomes for their clients to help them make choices that will support a specific outcome. These predictions come from the spirit realm.
There is however one problem with that. Remember, in the world of Spirit there is no such thing as chronological time. So, when a psychic sees a particular future event during a reading, a number of factors may still determine or change the timing of when it might occur. This is also known as ‘divine timing.’
The main factor usually influencing the ‘when’ of an outcome is our own free will. The choices and decisions we make every day can either speed up, slow down or even prevents outcomes from manifesting. The second factor is what is known as ‘divine timing.’ Spirit may hold off on a certain outcome, for example, until the circumstances are ideal and we are ready for it to come to pass.
Find The Eye Of The Storm
Your relationship is falling apart, you have lost your job, your finances are in a shambles, you suffer an unexpected loss due to a global pandemic. Chaos comes in many forms and at times it touches multiple areas of our lives at once.
The ripple effect starts in one area and then spreads insidiously, until every aspect of your life begins to look very bleak. Your emotional reserves are drained, confusion sets in and you feel stuck, powerless…reeling from the shock.
When things turn bad in your life this way it can have the force and power of a hurricane or tornado. It can be devastating.
Perhaps you sensed it coming. Your intuitive radar was ‘pinging’, sensing imminent danger, or maybe it caught you completely off-guard. Either way, the results are the same.
Now what? How do you get your bearings, recover your sense of direction, recharge your battery and get the inner strength to move forward?
All tropical storms have a center, or an eye. The stronger the storm the calmer the eye, which is characterized by lighter winds and a clearer sky. So, take a breath – a deep breath – and find your center. Find the eye of your storm.
Making decisions from fear or chaos always increases the strength and ferocity of the storm. Remember, all storms do pass. The beauty of life lies in the newness and change each moment offers us.