Love & Relationships
Embracing The Shadow
When I first began to intentionally and consciously walk a spiritual path, I remember doing so because it just felt so right. Every step I took toward ‘enlightenment’ in this lifetime seemed to bring more brightness into my life, and so many more blessings.
In those early days I was really rolling! I was expecting this to be an easy ride – all joy and light and love. It was wonderful.
What I hadn’t expected was the inevitable emergence of my shadow through as a result of all my spiritual work. And it was not something I was going to be comfortable with – admitting I had places of darkness within me, unloved aspects of myself, disowned pieces of my soul which had been abandoned and in such pain.
Through a series of, what seemed like, unfortunate events, I was given opportunities to face my shadow side. Challenges in relationships with friends and loved ones arose. I couldn’t understand it at first, and felt very alone and misunderstood. I was shifting the blame for this onto the people around me, instead of going inward.
Going inward, into the light, was totally okay, but going inward into the darkness was terrifying. My ego-self raised every defense to keep me from going there. Eventually, I could avoid it no longer.
My life at this point had endured tremendous change in the course of only a few years- so much so, that the entire landscape of my existence and the people in it were now different. While many of the changes were positive, the magnitude of the differences between my ‘old life’ and my ‘new life’ forced me into robust self-reflection.
Where did I want to go with my life? What did I want to do? And who was I going to be? I must admit, these were heavy questions, and I absolutely felt the weight of them. In addition, I was healing from a personal loss, and that was taking more time than I wanted it to.
My ‘aha moment’ came when I was lamenting one day about my relationship with my partner. I had identified that I wanted a deeper level of connection, but felt that he was unwilling to meet me there.
Embracing The Mirages Of Life
Imagine yourself walking through a hot desert, whipped by the relentless winds, and scorched by what feels like an unforgiving sun. Suddenly, a crystal-clear spring emerges in the distance. But the closer you come to this beautiful fountain, the more you realize that its calm waters are evaporating into thin air.
Taken aback, you face the reality that what you envisioned was never real or true. It was nothing more than a mere mirage. This optical illusion created by warm air near the ground refracting the light from the sky has deceived weary travelers for thousands of years. Ancient poets even wrote verses that spoke of the delights and dangers of the mirage. Sacred texts reveal the mirage that gave hungry and thirsty pilgrims hope during long migrations or exodus.
As a spiritualist, I often receive calls from clients who have also been misled by mirages, only these mirages are not of the biblical deserts that prophets of old journeyed across. These are instead the ‘mirages of life.’ I often hear clients lament how everything appeared to line up so perfectly, but the outcome was an unexpected disappointment. My answer is always the same. There are times in life when on the surface everything seems to be falling into place, yet the desired outcome does not complete the story we had hoped to write.
I some cases, the seemingly ‘perfect partner’ stuck around for years without any proposal for marriage. In other instances, there was an awesome interview for the dream job that ultimately was offered to someone else. I could share countless examples of how expected outcomes are sometimes derailed in our world.
We have all encountered mirages in our life, as well as the disappointment and heartbreak that follow. But if you really take a step back and reflect on your past disappointments, you will soon note that Spirit always had a much better plan with your name on it. The love you thought you lost is often replaced with a better love you never imagined possible. The position you wanted more than anything was more appropriately aligned with someone else, and instead of misplacing your gifts and talents, the new job you ultimately found was much more fulfilling than you ever thought possible.
Manifesting A Better Life Starts With You
Anyone can manifest what they want and need in life. It all comes down to energy because we are spirit energy in human form. The energy we put out; is the energy we receive back. It pretty much is that simple. But we also need to believe this, for it helps a great deal in bringing it closer to us.
So, how does this energy swapping process work? Well, it begins with focusing on something that you really want or need. Then think more on it, request it, wish it, desire it. This is called the process of manifesting or deliberate creating or cosmic ordering. You are putting your wish or desire out into to the Universe, and Universe, Spirit, God, the Divine receives this information and ultimately brings it back to you in manifested form as a gift or blessing.
Some people are more in-tune with the Universe than others, or more aligned with Spirit, and therefore able to manifest more easily and quickly. But while some of us believe wholeheartedly and have absolutely no doubt, others may be more hesitant or uncertain about what to believe, or not. Fortunately, no matter where you fall on the belief spectrum, you can still use manifesting to assist you in life, but your results will vary based on your faith.
One can manifest with positive thinking, prayer, affirmations or meditation, but I find that focused visualizations, creating a vision board, and writing down your wishes, seem to make it even more powerful! It’s as if the Universe says, “Wow, she is really serious about this, and asking so sincerely, let me reward her efforts!”
Sometimes manifesting can grind to a complete halt for us. We all have to grow, and learn, and evolve spiritually. If we do not do this, the Universe is not too happy when we repeat the same old patterns, make the same old mistakes, and show little effort to become a better person, or a more evolved soul. We cannot expect to receive spiritual rewards or gifts until we make the necessary changes. Successful manifesting goes hand in hand with personal growth and spiritual expansion. Continue reading
The Power Of The Human Spirit
My maternal grandparents were very significant people in my life. We called them Mama and Papa, and we were extremely attached to them, and loved them dearly. They taught me important life lessons about love, loyalty, courage, and the resilient power of the human spirit.
They were married very young, which was not uncommon in those days, and went on to produce large family of 15 children. My grandfather worked on the docks in the small town where we grew up, and made very good money doing it.
Their lifestyle should have been more comfortable than it was, since his income was quite substantial for that time. But it was not, and this was not due to them having so many children either. The real reason was that he was an alcoholic and a gambler, so there were many times when the family did not fare so well financially, for obvious reasons.
This was not something we realized as children, and if we were told we would probably not have given it any credibility. We simply worshiped our grandparents too much to believe such a thing!
My own parents were quite poor, so when Papa gave us a nickle or a dime, and sometimes even a quarter, he certainly seemed a hero to us. It was not just the money. Papa gave us the most profound love and attention that poor, neglected children crave and we reciprocated in kind. We absolutely adored him.
Although Papa was in truth not always conscious of the daily needs of his family, it was still abundantly clear he cared for all of us with a strength that is not always understood, especially when it came to our grandmother. One could not only see, but also feel his intense love for her.
They had mostly lived in very humble homes during the many years they were married, and while we are now certain Mama must have found it trying at the best of times, she was never heard to utter a complaining word. Such was her loyal devotion to her life partner.
Paranormal Activity, Or Energy Residue?
Clients sometimes ask me to do an energy clearing in their homes or businesses. In have even been asked to do a cleansing in stables, where the horses had been inexplicably out of sorts and acting out of character. The energy clearing methods I use vary from the more typical Western techniques to traditional African methods that I learned while living there.
One of the most memorable clearings I ever did was for a long-standing client who struggled with a deep sense of guilt over the suicide of her late husband. She had asked me to do an energy clearing ritual in her home, to see what I could pick up.
Her husband had ended his life sitting in a large, plush wingback chair in their home, where they were bringing up their two young children. Apparently, they had argued a lot in the weeks leading up to his death, particularly after he’d discovered her affair with another man.
Guilt overwhelmed her, and her late husband’s family made their judgment of her very clear. They felt his passing was her fault.
In a mediumship reading I did for her, her late husband had come through with messages that proved he had crossed over to the Other Side, that he was at peace, and that she was never to blame for him choosing to depart from this life. Instead, he spoke of his own life-long battle with depression, and his personal failures in their broken marriage.
The mediumship validations were however not enough to ease my client’s haunting feelings of guilt. She was convinced that her husband’s troubled spirit was haunting their home, and she insisted on me doing an energy cleansing. She was, however, not keen on some of the more typical Western clearing methods, nor the shamanic African approaches I offered, so I suggested we simply use some sage incense and prayer, and she was satisfied for me to do so.
She also consented to me having free access to every nook and cranny of the house, because it is often surprising where energy disturbances can reside. She believed there was a heavy, dark cloud of negative energy around that wingback chair, but to my surprise, there was nothing! In fact, the whole room was clear of any negative vibrations. Continue reading