Love & Relationships
Do You Follow Your Head, Or Your Heart?
As a practicing astrologer, I often assist clients who are facing the head versus heart dilemma. Should they go with what their head is telling them, or should they follow their heart?
“My head tells me he’s so perfect for me. He is my dream guy on paper, ticks every box. He has a successful career, earns a solid income. He is someone my kids would love, the male role-model they so desperately need,” a client recently explained.
“But my heart feels so hesitant, like its beating for someone else I haven’t met yet. He is a great guy, but there no butterflies. It doesn’t make sense. I don’t understand why my heart is yearning for someone different?” she lamented.
“I can’t afford to be picky and my friends and family tell me I’m crazy to even question this incredible guy who seems to tick all the right boxes, but doesn’t put a flutter in my heart!”
The question is indeed, why would one trust an illogical feeling that can’t be quantified and measured using the neat little pros and cons list of the mind? In my Astrology practice, I have see this conundrum play out many times.
Interestingly, I find this vexing situation is often related to a Mercury Square Moon aspect in someone’s chart. Such a person will often take one side over the other, usually the head over the heart, and this habitual battle can result in a lifelong pattern of bad choices.
Culturally we’ve also been conditioned to always choose reason over feelings. And what others think often also factors too highly in a personal choice that’s best made selfishly. In my opinion, relationships are one of the few areas in life where we get to be selfish, because if we choose someone who will not make us happy, everyone will suffer in the end.
We are often told ‘trust our gut’ for good reason. Your intuition or inner guidance system knows far more than you do! But like a muscle, we must build it up, we must work it, flex it, to clearly register the signals it’s sending us.
The Divine Justice Of Karmic Lessons
We sometimes feel we have been wronged by others in some awful way, and then we wonder if the perpetrators will get their ‘come uppance’ or ‘just deserts.’ We wish to know if divine justice will be served upon them.
Sometimes we are so upset or angry that we would like to see this retribution happen immediately and right before our very eyes. In these emotional moments we are out for revenge and want to see the other person reap what they’ve sown. We believe it may bring us some peace that justice has finally been done.
As a youngster, I often heard my mother refer to it as “The Law of Return,” suggesting that whatever we put out there, both good and bad, will always come back to us. She would say that it always comes back to us tenfold!
There are also spiritual teachings and wisdom traditions that suggest if we don’t learn our lessons and correct our mistakes in this lifetime, it will become karmic in the next. It further suggests that we eventually will experience whatever harm or wrongdoing we have imposed upon others in our own life, sometimes for several lifetimes, until we’ve truly learned our lesson.
So, will others get what’s coming to them for the pain and suffering they have caused us? It’s my experience that this is rarely the case, but from evidential mediumship messages, I am convinced that a life review, when we reach the other side, is inevitable. The soul who has hurt someone else, will be held accountable and will feel what the other person felt very intensely.
I do know from spirit messages that have come through from certain relatives and family members on the other side, that they have relived what I had felt when they were harsh towards in this life. Spirit often comes through with messages of guilt, remorse and regret. The aim is usually to seek healing and forgiveness.
Astrology Forecast June 14 – 20, 2021
Things unfold pretty calmly as the Sun spends its last days in Gemini this week, encouraging us to integrate all the new ideas and information we’ve learned over the past three weeks.
A Leo Moon hangs in the heavens today and tomorrow, bringing out our generous and heart-based sides. But beware the Leo Moon opposing Saturn in Aquarius today that can cause us to feel disenchanted or even depressed, and may also lead to a sense of emotional distance or feeling abandoned and lonely in our relationships.
Stay calms and be patient, because tomorrow Gemini Sun sextile the Moon in Leo will improve communication and social harmony and briefly reduce the need for power struggles. Tomorrow may therefore be a great time to ask your friend or relatives for help, or your employer for that well-deserved raise or promotion.
Details and organization will be the themes on Wednesday and Thursday under a Virgo Moon, so save those sorts of tasks for mid-week. However, the Virgo Moon opposition to Jupiter in Pisces may cause relationship conflicts from earlier in the week to resurface, so avoid unnecessary disagreement and drama, and try to keep the peace at home until the weekend.
A loving Libra Moon will fortunately accompany us into the weekend on Friday and Saturday, highlighting relationships and a return to fairness and balance. The Gemini Sun trine the Libra Moon will further contribute happiness and harmony to our relationships and family life over the weekend.
On Sunday Jupiter will turn retrograde, but we may not even notice, as we’ll be drifting through the spiritual and intuitive tones of the Scorpio Moon. After a month of information overload and two eclipses, this weekend is best spent regrouping before we move into a new season and all the wonders that await us.
The annual summer solstice also occurs Sunday, marking the start of summer in the Northern Hemisphere (and winter in the Southern Hemisphere).
Seeing Yourself As You Truly Are
The art of ‘being seen’ begins within. It is not in the eyes, or heart, of an external beholder. It is the grace of being able to see oneself through the Divine Eyes of our Creator.
Every soul is unique. No two are the same. Each soul emanates from the Supreme Loving Source to offer its unique beauty and pleasure to God in an incomparable, individual way. When we look at ourselves through this lens, the true beauty, light, and power of the spiritual spark of our being shines upon our inner vision.
Relationships offer mirrors too. But what they show vary according to the quality of the reflecting surface. And what we see in them depends upon how well we know, see, and stand in the truth of our own higher self.
For example, if I look at myself in a broken mirror, do I see a crack in my face? I might…if I am not sure of who I am. However, if I know myself to be whole, I can readily recognize that the crack is in the mirror, and not in my face.
Similarly, there are relationships in life that reflect broken images back to us. That does not mean that we are broken, nor that the other person or people involved are broken either. We all have wounds and scars and other gaping holes yet to be healed, or not.
Whatever the case may be, it is the relationship itself that offers up the reflective element. It is the dynamic of exchange that shows itself as either clean, clear, balanced, cracked, smeared, skewed, and so on.
Knowing oneself in truth and wholeness is thus extremely valuable. If we do not possess such certainty of self, we may accept a broken or distorted impression projected by an ill-functioning relationship to be a reflection upon ourselves.
Tune Into The Guidance Of Your Emotions
I believe our emotions are an additional ‘sense’ we use as a means of interpreting our life experiences, in the same way the normal five senses enable us to perceive and understand the world around us. Our ‘emotional sense’ help us make decisions about our preferences all the time.
For example, I love chocolate. My sense of taste tells me that chocolate is for me! It’s a very clear and obvious signal from my taste buds to my brain. We receive and process stimuli all the time and our senses help us to ‘make sense’ of that input.
Your emotions are also giving you information about your preferences and if we listen and pay attention, we can gain a lot of guidance from it. Our emotions don’t just come from nowhere. They arise in direct response to stimuli or input, just like our senses do.
I have also heard emotions described as an internal guidance system, or our inner compass, which helps us decide what we want to create more of, and less of, in our life. We sometimes get confused though, because just like the other senses, we have different preferences.
For example, some people love coconut desserts, but I detest then. Not thanks, keep your coconut out of my chocolate! The thing is, I’m not confused about the fact that I don’t like coconut. I also don’t feel I have to change my preference because other people love coconut. And I also don’t force myself to eat it, just to make other people happy.
When one of our five physical senses tells us something we tend to listen, because it’s visceral. We feel it undeniably in the body. Emotions are no different!
When you are heartbroken, do you not feel it in your chest as a physical pain? When you are embarrassed, do your cheeks or ears not become flushed? Or how about when someone you love hugs you so warm and deliciously, all your muscles just ‘melt’ into that person? These are all physical responses the accompany our emotions.
The Truth Be Told
Have you ever been told you are just too honest? Well, I have, and this very statement has given me a lot of food for thought. I have been wondering why being honest does not typically win any popularity contests?
It took a lot of meditation and mulling it over in my mind for several days, for me to finally decide how I felt about people being ‘too honest.’
Truth be told, I would much rather be honest and deal with other ‘overly honest’ people, than the opposite. I prefer not to have people smile to my face, and then later stab me in the back.
A client who has been reading with me for over a decade, came for a session recently. She was very depressed and teary-eyed. Before we even started, I saw in my mind’s eye my symbol for a broken heart. I also saw that she would find healing, but not soon.
It soon unfolded that her boyfriend of two years had in fact broken up with her and moved out. Spirit then showed me that she had been too honest with him. “He doesn’t always appreciate it when you tell him the truth,” I said. “Even when he asked you for your honest opinion, he would be offended when you gave it to him.
“Yes,” she replied, “the reason he moved on was that I was too honest and direct for his liking.” Just unbelievable, I thought to myself.
Apparently, many people feel it’s okay to tell a little white lie. This is usually the case when they feel being very honest will possibly hurt the other person’s feelings. In my mind, when you ask for an honest opinion, then you are open to the truth. If not, then don’t ask. When I ask my best friend if a pair of blue jeans makes my butt look big, then I really want to know – the truth!
This is what I love about doing readings. Spirit only gives truthful and honest answers. The recipient of this guidance then knows how their choices will influence the direction or the outcome of a situation.
The Social Challenges Of Being Psychic
I am often asked what it is like is to be psychic. It is a blessing when I can use my gift to be of service to others. However, it can sometimes also be a burden to know things you are not supposed to know, especially if you can do very little about it. Sitting silently on the sidelines and watching patiently is a big part of being psychic.
The other day, for example, a customer came into my store. He was on speaker phone with his wife, telling her how he was buying her and their kids some surprise gifts from my store. But she sounded disinterested, hostile, even angry. She certainly did not seem grateful for what he was doing for the family.
My employees commented afterwards on how sorry they felt for the poor guy, and how awful his wife sounded. But I advised them to not judge so easily – we never know what is truly going on in other people’s lives.
The truth is, I intuitively knew more about the couple than my staff did. I sensed he had cheated on her and that he was not the perfect husband. He believes doing things like surprise shopping for the family would somehow make up for all the pain and disappointment he had caused her.
One time, I had a friend who introduced me to another friend and her fiancé. After the couple left, I told her I was concerned that her friend’s fiancé may be gay. I also told her that he was going to break off the engagement a month before the wedding. I suggested she talk to her friend, to soften the blow and prepare her.
My friend knows I am psychic, but she is always a little skeptical. She became very angry at me and insisted that I had it entirely wrong. The fiancé, she said, was clearly very masculine and did not act gay at all! She went on to say some deeply hurtful things to me, implying, among other things, that I probably only thought he was gay because he did not make a pass at me.