Life Design
Sometimes It’s Okay To Keep Your Distance!
Many of us have that one relative we do get along with. In every family there is a ‘Cousin John’ or an ‘Aunt Lydia’ who we simply cannot stand. Try as we might, we just cannot find it in our hearts to love them unconditionally.
In my case it is an uncle who’s views and opinions I just cannot tolerate. I despise all forms of racism, misogyny, and bigotry, and I am also an avid supporter of the LGBTQ community. I have no patience with people who criticize or belittle others for who they were born to be. It is unacceptable and despicable.
For many years now I have been consciously practicing healthy boundaries with relatives and people in general. I preach it! Healthy boundaries are vital for one’s mental health, personal growth and emotional well-being.
My Grandmother and I got along so well when she was in this life. We were like two peas in a pod. When she eventually came to live with us later in her life, there was however one issue that caused tension between us – her son.
My uncle was so out of line, in so many ways that I just could not tolerate having him anywhere near me. He is an extremely hateful man who has no qualms about freely spewing his vitriolic prejudice, verbal abuse and bigoted views in front of anyone who cares to listen, including the children in the family.
My grandmother stubbornly remained loyal to her son through it all, and she could now understand why I could not accept him. She said that it was such a shame that we could not all get along, while I felt it as a shame that he is so hateful. She would make excuses for him, saying for example that he was bullied in school. But I felt he should work on himself, instead of hating on other folks for no reason. She could not see my perspective from her way of thinking. Continue reading
Today’s Journey, Not Tomorrow’s Destination
I often hear my clients say, “If only I can meet my soulmate, then I will be happy.” Then when they meet that special person, they say they will finally be happy once they propose. Once they are married, then they cannot be completely happy until they have children.
Then, if they only one child, then can only be happy if they have a second. Or if they have two boys, they will only find lasting happiness once they also have a girl. Or they can only be happy once they have built or bought the dream house, or lost the weight, or launched their new business, and on, and on.
The worst scenario is people waiting for their retirement to finally be happy.
If you ask other people you will discover that nobody has everything they want. Most people have never had ‘everything.’ The few that might seem to have it all, usually do not. There is always something still lacking or missing. Nobody’s life is perfect.
Many of us spend our fleeting time on this planet wanting more, being insatiable, and never feeling fulfilled, content, or happy. It’s wonderful to have goals. Not having goals can be extremely depressing. But enjoying the process and journey toward achieving those goals will make them have even more valued and fulfilling.
More importantly, we are seldom grateful or appreciative for what we do already have. I have also found that not being grateful will bring us karmic lessons of appreciation, often by losing the good things in our life that we so easily disregard. I have seen that time and again with clients, friends and relatives.
We are an insatiable, greedy society. This who become millionaires, then want to be multi-millionaires., and then won’t be happy or fulfilled until they’re billionaires. When is enough, enough. We can only wear one outfit at a time, drive one car at a time and live in one house at a time.
I have so many friends who spent their children’s entire childhood chasing the career dreams and business goals, constantly being stressed, frazzled and not at all present when they do spend a little time with their kids. Then they wake up one day and realize their children are grown and gone, and they missed most of it.
Astrology Forecast December 13 – 19, 2021
It will be a free-for-all today as Mercury moves into Capricorn and Mars dances into Sagittarius! With both of these personal planets changing into different signs at the same time, we may feel a bit conflicted, as Mars in Sagittarius wants to play, while Mercury in Capricorn reminds us there’s lots of work to do! Finding a balance between the two can be tricky, so good luck with that!
The Aries Moon square Pluto in Capricorn will also not be helping the situation today, as this constellation can cause us to be passive, dreamy and distracted. Be careful not to lose yourself in wishful thinking or imprudent daydreams.
Fortunately, we can get a lot more done tomorrow and Wednesday with the Moon traveling through grounded and determined Taurus. Then we can relax and have fun as the Moon moves through Gemini Thursday through Saturday, culminating in a Gemini Full Moon, also called the Cold Moon. This Full Moon is great for releasing old ideas or seeking new ways to address old issues, whether they be health-related, how to make more money, or how to fix that annoying drip in the bathroom sink.
Also, beware the Gemini Full Moon’s potential for making us moody and irritable. Avoid conflict with loved ones this weekend, as peace and harmony may be hard to come by under this lunar influence.
Venus will turn retrograde on Sunday and travel backward through the end of January 2022, taking us on a journey down memory lane and asking us to reevaluate our priorities, what we love, as well as what we envision for our lives, and why.
The World Needs Highly Sensitive People
You’re being way too sensitive. Get over yourself. Don’t take everything so personally. Why are you being such a cry baby?
If you are a highly sensitive person (HSP) you have probably had others say such things to you at some point. But there is nothing wrong with you. According to renowned HSP researcher Dr. Elaine Aron, your sensitivity trait is perfectly normal. In fact, it is found in 15 to 20 percent of the population, which is way too many people for it to be a ‘disorder.’ However, it is still rare or exceptional enough to be misunderstood by most people around you, if they are part of the remaining 80 percent ‘non-sensitive’ population.
The highly sensitive person has increased sensitivity to physical, emotional, or social stimuli. It is also referred to by some experts as having sensory processing sensitivity. HSPs are more reactive, for example, to negativity, unpleasant emotion, or violence.
Because much of western culture is dominated by extroverted types, the more reflective, introspective HSP sometimes feel lost in the shuffle. They are the ones who need extra time to process things, who may sit by ourselves, or in like-minded pairs, at a large gathering.
HSPs seek to form deeper bonds and keep the peace instead of fighting. A noisy, chaotic, and rude world is often very overwhelming for them. It can be especially difficult for HSP men in a misogynist society, since many of the HSP traits are not celebrated as traditionally ‘masculine.’
The truth is that the world needs HSPs and their unique gifts. The HSP’s abilities to console, nurture, heal, and build relationships are invaluable for humanity. We all want a world where universal qualities like justice, empathy, and honesty are celebrated and practiced.
At work, they are the types who notice everything and attend to the smallest details, though they may often be overlooked for promotion. In family life, they are the ones who settle disagreements and find common ground. In the political world, they are diplomats and peace-keepers.
Dealing With ‘Unawakened’ Friends And Family
Spiritual awakening is a profound shift in our perception that forever alters the way we experience life. But after we have made the shift it can be difficult to relate to less spiritually aware friends and relatives and leave one feeling lonely and deeply isolated.
The following strategies can be helpful in cultivating more harmony between yourself and ‘unconscious’ people without compromising your own energy vibration.
COMPASSION AND EMPATHY
At one time you were also not awakened. Think back to what that was like. What kind of thoughts dominated your mind? How did you feel about your life? How did you feel in general? The truth is, although you’ve gone through a spiritual awakening, you can still relate to those who have not. You have a point of reference for this.
Someone who is unconscious typically doesn’t have a pleasant inner world, because they aren’t intentionally governing it. Think back to what your life and most importantly – your relationship with yourself and your mind – looked like before your awakening. What did your own resistance look like? At some point your perspective shifted. But prior to that point – how receptive were you to changing your views and ideas? Especially when a family member came to you and said, “Hey, you’re doing it wrong.”
Put yourself in their shoes. Now that you’ve awakened you have the pleasure to start putting it to use in a way that serves the highest and best good of all. Remember that every soul is a spiritual being, and just because you have awakened to this fact, does not make you ‘better than’ anyone else. This is a trap that the ego likes to throw up early, and often along the spiritual path.
The ego is something we must constantly be mindful of. You are not more spiritual because you are vegan, or because you meditate, or because you do Yoga. If you are living in judgment of others through these practices, you are trapped in ego. Be mindful of yourself and come back to a state of compassion and empathy. Allow people to awaken in their own time.
Raise Your Vibration With Love And Light
Everything is energy, vibration, and frequency. Everything! Changing your vibration changes your frequency. This can lift the veil between dimensions. You will see things differently. Your intuition will evolve.
If you think limitation, you are limitation. If you think abundance, your are abundance. If you send the universe messages that you deserve something, positive or negative, the universe will send that to you in return. Positive or negative.
I often have clients ask why they keep attracting a certain kind of romantic partner. In my experience the issue is not in the attracting of that person, but rather understanding why they stay with that person.
There are many dysfunctional people in the world. So, attracting dysfunctional people is not unusual. But keeping them in your life, putting up with them, being intimate with them, and marrying them is not about them and their dysfunction. It’s about you. Your vibration is sending out a signal that you believe you deserve that kind of person. If you believe you deserve dysfunction, you will attract dysfunction.
We all meet at least one mentally healthy, well-adjusted person in our lifetime that we were not attracted to. Why? Our vibration was low or not in resonance with that person’s energy.
How do we raise our vibration? By engaging with input energies with high vibration frequencies. If you watch television, watch ‘higher vibration’ television. Bad reality TV, violence, horror movies and crime shows lower your vibration and attract darker energies on all dimensions. Too much radiation from phones, computers and television sets also lowers our vibration.
Lifestyle choices also determine our energetic frequency. Drugs and alcohol lower our vibration. Same goes for processed food with chemicals, additives and pesticides lower our vibration. Conversations that are petty, gossipy, and negative not only degrades others, but also lowers our vibration. Fear, anxiety and anger also lower our vibration.
Astrology Forecast December 6 – 12, 2021
A peaceful week awaits as we move forward with renewed confidence and faith in the future.
We’ll do our best work today under the Capricorn Moon, so we’ll need to arrange our agenda for the week so that the most pressing obligations on our list are taken care of today. Fortunately, an early Capricorn Moon trine Uranus in Taurus inspires us with heightened focus, ambition, and persuasive charm this morning, while the Mars in Scorpio sextile Pluto in Capricorn will boost our confidence, assertiveness, and determination over the next three days.
Tomorrow and Wednesday unfold under an Aquarius Moon, bringing our humanitarian interests to the forefront. Friendships need to be attended to, as some things may have fallen by the wayside, and if there are any connections we feel ready to leave behind for whatever reason, now is the time to consider walking away. The Aquarius Moon conjunction Jupiter in Aquarius on Thursday may bring some financial gains and social success.
The Moon will travel through Pisces on Thursday through Saturday, evoking our spiritual and artistic interests. This is an ideal time to get busy if you’re planning on making holiday gifts for loved ones, as creative energy will prevail. It’s also an ideal time for some personal introspection to evaluate, eliminate and reconfigure what we value and what we are ready to release.
Sunday’s Aries Moon will encourage us to cast heavy energy aside and have some fun!