self-delusion
Cultivating The Sacred, Or Breeding Contempt?
Let’s imagine you own an exotic, stunning Bengal cat. Gorgeous markings, intelligent maybe, even psychic. It often acts more like a dog than a tiger and… it also poops. The whole package is the cat. Do you focus on the smell and inconvenience of the poop when sharing stories and talking about the cat? Do you always bring up in conversation what you know about the cat poop, and perhaps other unsavory behaviors? No, of course not! Usually you brag about your cat.
Yet, when it comes to humans, people will brag about how much they know the unsavory (in their opinion) underside of someone, especially if it is a movie star, or a well-known spiritual teacher or healer. It is as if you know some ‘gory details’ about someone of note, this is proof you are ‘in with the it-crowd’ because you know these private things.
If it is a spouse, and you do this, it can often be an underhanded way of control or expressing anger that you do not have the courage or maturity to express directly with the intent of healing and becoming closer with your partner. People who have learned to behave as victims often make this passive-aggressive choice.
All people have a ‘poop side’ to them. Why would anyone choose to focus on that? Are they too scared to stay on their own path, in their own lane? Do they feel the need to be better than others? Why do some people feel obligated to let others know they are one of the ‘special ones’ that has seen the ‘poop side’ of someone, especially if they bring it up in public in an inappropriate fashion? How does that feed their ego, or their wounded self-esteem? Why does that make them feel safer in their world? Do they use it as a way to avoid a direct problem-solving conversation with the person? Continue reading
Inventory And Choices
People often ask me how to make more progress on their spiritual path. Unfortunately the answer is always the same: time, practice, dedication and money. Money? Yes, even in the days of tribalism, the Shaman was always paid. Communities supported the shaman, to enable her to serve the tribe while keeping her own spiritual practice current and vital. So, yes, the currency of support these days is not food or shelter, but it is money.
As a professor at an art college, I used to observe that the students who were true artists often practiced their art in every spare moment. The students that only wanted a career in art did all they could do just to get by with their classes and training, so they could launch their ‘career’ and get what they wanted and desired, such as money, fame, status or lifestyle.
One is not better than the other, by the way. But this is about looking at what choices you truly make, not what you imagine. Take an inventory of where you spend your time, energy and money, and then look at it carefully, and learn. Own your choices so you don’t convince yourself or others that you are a victim.
By owning your choices, you will have the benefit of not manipulating others (consciously or unconsciously) by presenting as a victim that must be taken care of, and therefore cannot be held accountable. Not presenting as a victim means you will learn to ask for help and support in an honest and mature fashion, rather than singing a sob story to get help and support. Continue reading
Let Spirit Put Ego In Its Place
I recently had a conversation with a lovely, learned lady who was quite beside herself, because her husband of ten years simply got up and walked out on her… with no explanation whatsoever! She was understandably beside herself with shock and grief. I asked her what kind of relationship she felt they had and she assured me it was a very loving one. I find it almost impossible to believe that a loving, caring partner would all of a sudden just turn his back with all they had shared together and walk out the door, in what appeared to be a cold and callous man.
I then asked her why she felt they had such a good situation between them and she said it was because she loved him so much. She did all she could to keep him happy and satisfied. Well, now we were obviously getting somewhere. On further probing I found this man had been emotionally detached, and certainly oblivious to her needs. How can this, by any definition, be a warm and loving relationship?
Her ego most assuredly suffered a blow, but I do wonder where spirit was in all of this. It would make no sense to me if spirit accepted such a one-sided relationship that was completely devoid of any care or kindness.
My suspicion is that she had convinced herself that this ‘relationship’ had to maintain itself, or she would not be an ‘acceptable’ woman if she did not have a prominent male in her life, even under these trying conditions. There we go, when ego runs the show a myriad of pains can certainly appear on the horizon! Continue reading
The Wounded Inner Child
A wounded inner child will wreak havoc in your life, control your emotional reactions, and flavor all of your life situations and choices. In the extreme, every abuser, pedophile, sadist, emotional abuser has also been abused, but more importantly, remain unhealed. The damages from their own past remain unexamined and is usually still alive in the unconsciousness, and therefore unhealed.
The magical, spiritual, loving, hopeful, optimistic, healed or never wounded inner child does the same: runs your life, controls your heart chakra, and therefore your emotional reactions, and makes healthy choices that support you as an adult.
Simply knowing about the state of your inner child, or making blithe comments about your inner child, does not imply a healing. Simply saying that you have learned some information is a bit like ‘monkey see, monkey do.’ It is a start, but information is not knowledge. Information applied, worked with, integrated into your learning styles, and into your life experiences, becomes knowledge.
Knowing you love someone is different than loving them. People who regularly abuse their spouse psychically, will fall on their knees proclaiming their love, even as their victim lays there waiting for the ambulance. And in their great sorrow, they actually mean what they say. And yet they will do it again, and again, and again. The information is in their head. They did a bad thing, they love their spouse, however because there is no knowledge, there is no healing. Their behavior will continue, until perhaps imprisonment, or some other extreme circumstance occurs. Continue reading
Tale-Bearers Seldom Smile
It is interesting how information comes to those of us who are seers. I am sure it is different for everyone, but I can be walking down the aisle in a grocery store and suddenly perceive a loud voice coming to me, saying something to alert me or to impart some message that is meant for a person in the vicinity.
A very good reason to try and ‘turn off’ this kind of incoming information, whenever we can, is that we sometimes have to share information that is not welcomed, or appreciated. That is why sharing psychic and mediumship information in a professional work setting is usually much more appropriate, as I have learned the hard way from a personal experiences.
We all have intuitive flashes when we feel something to be right and true. It tends to come to fruition if we pay attention, because we are usually right in our intuition, feeling or prediction. A good example is that moment when we feel someone cannot be trusted with information, or that feeling that someone is a gossip. Continue reading
Grieving Through Loss
Most of us have had to deal with loss of some sort in our lives. It could be a death: the loss of a pet, a friend, a sibling, a parent, a lover, or even a child. Intense feelings of sadness, anger or uncertainty may occur when we divorce, lose friendships or even leave jobs. You might even find yourself distressed over missed opportunities in your life.
Pretty much any time our idea of security and normalcy in our lives gets shaken up, we might find ourselves in a state of grief. For many, grief is often seen as a bad thing. A time of sorrow, sadness, anger, resentment, helplessness, weakness and frustration.
Some will face loss with utter avoidance – trying to push the grief aside, while boldly and courageously moving forward, trying to be strong. However, I’ve come to realize grief is not only normal, it’s necessary. If we ignore our grief, it often causes many problems in our lives and more importantly, in our relationships. Without acknowledging our loss, and allowing ourselves to grieve, we can never begin to heal. Continue reading
Into Me See, Or Great Avoidance Game?
Lying About, well, everything. The Culture of Shame and Manipulation. So much thought, time, concentration and energy goes into creating and maintaining our ‘presentation’ as either a victim or being ‘positive.’ If there were PhD’s in these areas the majority of us would qualify.
Is it just this era, or has it always been this way? That is hard to tell, and on some level, irrelevant. It is here now. People come for help. Then they ‘present.’
I have enormous money problems. You get them a job, but they have no time to work because they are “busy” with hobbies and “other things,” which they have decided are “more important” so they only show up one day of the week. Then they never come in for help again, because they have been ‘outed.’ Continue reading