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Shenpa Is Not About Getting ‘Called Out’

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comA true teacher offers you a path to extraordinary personal expansion, because she has no investment in praising you in your mediocrity or dysfunction, in order to help you falsely ‘feel good,’ so you will keep coming back for more. But many people find it hard, threatening, or embarrassing, to practice shenpa, even if it is coming from a teacher that loves them enough to be sometimes more committed to their advancement than they are themselves.

Shenpa is a form of mindfulness, applied to you, so you can basically call it ‘mindful self-awareness.’  It is originally a concept in Tibetan Buddhism, meaning ‘attachment’ or a place where we become ‘hooked’ or ‘stuck.’ Pema Chödrön describes shenpa as “the urge, the hook, that triggers our habitual tendency to close down. We get hooked in that moment of tightening when we reach for relief. To get unhooked, we begin by recognizing that moment of unease and learn to relax in that moment.”

In this age of ‘victim worship,’ most people have been taught and rewarded for being or praising victims, no matter what. This approach infers that the victim is a deformed, delicate, broken porcelain object that must be treated with soft gloves. The victim is considered to be so emotionally and mentally deranged that you must coddle them, because deep down inside you don’t believe they have the resources in their own Self to recover, to grow, to self-validate.

This ultimately is a putdown… not a vote of confidence. This gives the message to the victim that they are ruined for life and therefore you will tolerate any behavior from them. This gives the subliminal message that you feel sorry for them, do not expect much, if anything from them, and also do not ultimately believe they will ever recover. They are, in your mind, and how you treat them, damaged for life. But actually they are not. Getting a scar is not brain damage! Continue reading

Living Ecstatic Bliss By Remaining Open To Life!

77033129rNothing is for certain. We are not locked in. Everything is at our disposal. We are as free as the wind. Responsibility remains with ourselves, while duty and obligation have no place in our lives, when subjected onto us by someone else. It’s an inside job. The greatest disservice and most fierce act of unkindness we will ever do to another is when we negate, abate and sublimate our ‘natural and convenient’ innate desires.

Unless we are authentic and the real deal, we do not, have not, and will not show up for our lives, relationships and work. We are merely playing ridiculous games of pretense. Regrettably and stupidly, not the first one of them fulfills, sustains or registers. It’s simply a dreary monotonous merry-go-round.

The long and short of it is this: it matters what we do – but only to us! If we are doing anything for anyone at anytime, for any other reason than for the gut-driven, instinctive passion that drives us to express our deeply embedded sublime, sensual, sacred, sexual, artistic natures, we are nothing but disposable phonies. We are merely walking around, in a desperately empty, apathetically numbed, half-awake daze… haphazardly avoiding the next car that may plow right into us. The one and only problem with that unlived scenario: we won’t even know what hit us. Our short time here on Earth would have been null, void and without meaning.

What meaning, you may ask? You might not see any meaning, but you know you are here for some reason or purpose, you just don’t know what that is. Of course, you don’t, because you have not showed up for your life, yet. You walk around with either a chip (boulder) on your shoulder, because your life hasn’t’ worked out as you planned. Or maybe you are displaying an exalted sense of elevated importance, thinking you deserve more than you have.

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Spirit Says You Can’t Please Everyone

click for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comI have learned that people-pleasing is something that one simply cannot do. People must learn to do it for themselves. We cannot please everyone all of the time, and some people will never be satisfied anyway, no matter how much time, energy and love we offer them. They are simply not ever going to be happy, no matter what. Period.

I can think of various situations where one might feel the need to coddle and people-please those we love and care for, but in the end it will only bring us self dis-ease and stress.

For example, the child who tries to please and be there and do everything for the parent. Why is this a bad idea? Well, the parent may give up if their child tries to do everything for them. Especially if they are older and trying to find themselves and re-establish their own life, after taking care of everyone else their whole life.

Sometimes we can smother an ageing parent with kindness, by trying to do too much for them. When we do this, it makes them second guess their ability to do things for themselves. It may even cause them to worry, have anxiety, or become fearful of living.

It is good to be there for one’s elderly parents, however there is a line that can be crossed if we try and do too much and make them feel like they cannot do certain things anymore. Sure, if their driver’s license has been taken from them, for example, and they cannot see well anymore, then obviously driving them places makes sense. But, if they are still able to function normally, then let them!

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