self-delusion
The Healing Power Of Positive Self-Talk
Most people indulge more in negative self-talk, than positive. But self-talk is not supposed to be negative and overly critical. We are supposed to use it to encourage, empower and motivate ourselves to achieve success and follow our dreams.
Our brain has the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and what is known in hypnosis as the critical factor of mind. This critical factor is that part of our consciousness that checks and filters every through and idea that enters our mind. It is like the gatekeeper or the guardian between the conscious mind and the subconscious. That is how hypnosis works – it is a way to bypass the critical factor so that we can access the subconscious and reprogram it with new information and insights for healing and self-empowerment.
The role of the critical factor is to protect our mind, but this is not always a good thing. Because of the job the critical mind is tasked to do, it tends to be critical of everything. It is unfortunately also that part of our brain that says we are not worthy or deserving, that we cannot do things, or achieve things.
I cannot get the job I really want.
I’m not worthy of a happy, healthy relationship.
I am not smart and pretty enough.
People just don’t like me.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
The one big problem with the critical factor is that it does not always see or hear things the way they really are. It can convince of things that are not true at all. For example, it may you that others are trying to get you fired from a job, when in fact the boss is trying to help you keep your job.
The Truth Be Told
Have you ever been told you are just too honest? Well, I have, and this very statement has given me a lot of food for thought. I have been wondering why being honest does not typically win any popularity contests?
It took a lot of meditation and mulling it over in my mind for several days, for me to finally decide how I felt about people being ‘too honest.’
Truth be told, I would much rather be honest and deal with other ‘overly honest’ people, than the opposite. I prefer not to have people smile to my face, and then later stab me in the back.
A client who has been reading with me for over a decade, came for a session recently. She was very depressed and teary-eyed. Before we even started, I saw in my mind’s eye my symbol for a broken heart. I also saw that she would find healing, but not soon.
It soon unfolded that her boyfriend of two years had in fact broken up with her and moved out. Spirit then showed me that she had been too honest with him. “He doesn’t always appreciate it when you tell him the truth,” I said. “Even when he asked you for your honest opinion, he would be offended when you gave it to him.
“Yes,” she replied, “the reason he moved on was that I was too honest and direct for his liking.” Just unbelievable, I thought to myself.
Apparently, many people feel it’s okay to tell a little white lie. This is usually the case when they feel being very honest will possibly hurt the other person’s feelings. In my mind, when you ask for an honest opinion, then you are open to the truth. If not, then don’t ask. When I ask my best friend if a pair of blue jeans makes my butt look big, then I really want to know – the truth!
This is what I love about doing readings. Spirit only gives truthful and honest answers. The recipient of this guidance then knows how their choices will influence the direction or the outcome of a situation.
Getting More From Your Psychic Reading
So, there you are, about to spend some well-earned money on a psychic reading. You have decided to get a reading about your life at this time, which is always a good idea.
But before you go ahead make sure you know how to get the best from your reading and how to wrap your mind around what you are going to hear and see. You may be a first timer, or a seasoned veteran of all things occult. It doesn’t matter.
The important thing, the first thing, is to be very sure why you are getting a reading. This must always be your starting point. It enables you to help yourself. It allows your mind to be open and ready to receive. The next thing you must do is to release your attachment to the outcome of the reading. Release all your expectations of what you would like to hear. Easier said than done? Hardly. That is merely an excuse. It only serves to paralyze you, and stems the very flow that you crave.
People often have many questions about what they should do when it comes to getting a reading. Should I carry a crystal? How will I know whom to choose to read for me? Do I just go with a random reader?
The answer to these questions is… do what you feel works best for you. You can carry a crystal if you want to. They have earth-driven qualities and they do help to remind us of beauty, which is always important. Choosing a reader online can be as easy or as complicated as you choose to make it. Choosing a reader in any situation means going with your heart, your instinct and, most of all, an open mind.
Keeping an open mind in a psychic reading is essential. By releasing attachment to the outcome, you allow Spirit to speak through the medium or the psychic, giving you the message that is meant for you alone. That is why you get a reading after all, isn’t it? I would hope so!
Still Hanging On To The Wrong Person?
Are you still hanging on to the wrong person? I know you adore him. I know you love her. I understand that you believe you are soulmates and ‘meant to be.’
But be aware that your beloved has free will. If they are not exactly alignment with you, no matter how you strongly feel about them, nothing will come of your ‘situationship.’ They are on their own journey and you cannot will someone to be your lover or life partner. It is nothing more than the beginning of a colossal heartbreak.
I have witnessed many love-struck people hang on for years to someone that has either left them for good, or kept stringing them along. Some of them have even married and had children with someone else, and yet, they still hang on. They often fervently believe their love interest will someday return to them and then they will live happily ever after. Well, the truth of the matter is that they will not. The other person has made their choice and walked away for a reason.
This new year, with all that has been going on in the world, it may be time to take a few deep breaths and have a self-reflective moment. Take a good, hard look at your life choices and your relationships.
If you are making unwise, self-sabotaging choices, consider what it may be that is not feeding your soul? What is it that is really missing in your life? Maybe it is time to release what no longer serves you. Simply let it go. Find your inner peace, and just be happy and content with yourself and who you truly are.
As a psychic advisor, I encounter the good, the bad and the ugly. I have seen much trauma and damage done, sometimes almost irreparable, to people in toxic relationships and love obsessions. Marriages of several years simply falling apart or ‘trusted’ partner walking out with zero notice. I have watched many go through failed relationship after failed relationship, always with the same results. The result is always the same: excruciating heartbreak.
When the victims of these bad relationship choices are encouraged to do some soul-searching, to see what it is inside of them that is compelling them to go back to the same type of person, time and time again, they are offended and become angry.
Getting More Out Of Life With Your Psychic Reading
Working as a psychic reader for so many years, I have learned a lot about the human condition. I have learned, for example, that all of us essentially want the same things in life. We all want to be loved and accepted, appreciated for our talents and gifts, and we all need a sense of belonging, and to feel secure, safe, and happy.
These are fundamental needs and a natural part of being human. How we satisfy these basic needs, and how we decide what brings us happiness, is where we differ as individuals. It matters not how our preferences differ, but instead that we can find ways to fulfill these needs, while maintaining our soul growth and purpose.
One person may be happy in the type of relationship that affords her the independence to travel with her girlfriends and to have time and space for herself, her hobbies and interests, and her spiritual practice. Another may prefer a partner to spend most of his free time with her, shares the same interests, and showers her with constant attention and gifts.
Over the years, I have witnessed how certain clients more easily achieve the type of relationship they want, while others struggle with one unhealthy relationship after the other. The same goes for career opportunities, business ventures, and finances too.
We all have areas in life where we need to open up, expand our awareness, and grow as a soul. I’ve found that my job as a psychic reader is not only to tell my client all I see around them, but to also help them grow spiritually. My job is to help my clients achieve their personal and spiritual goals in all aspects of their life.
This becomes challenging when someone tells me they do not care about their personal and spiritual growth, or how they can achieve more of what they want. Instead, they only want what they want right now, and are unwilling to look at the bigger picture of what can be done to increase the likelihood of reaching their goal. This is often the reason why some become stuck in dead-end, toxic relationships, for example.
Embracing The Mirages Of Life
Imagine yourself walking through a hot desert, whipped by the relentless winds, and scorched by what feels like an unforgiving sun. Suddenly, a crystal-clear spring emerges in the distance. But the closer you come to this beautiful fountain, the more you realize that its calm waters are evaporating into thin air.
Taken aback, you face the reality that what you envisioned was never real or true. It was nothing more than a mere mirage. This optical illusion created by warm air near the ground refracting the light from the sky has deceived weary travelers for thousands of years. Ancient poets even wrote verses that spoke of the delights and dangers of the mirage. Sacred texts reveal the mirage that gave hungry and thirsty pilgrims hope during long migrations or exodus.
As a spiritualist, I often receive calls from clients who have also been misled by mirages, only these mirages are not of the biblical deserts that prophets of old journeyed across. These are instead the ‘mirages of life.’ I often hear clients lament how everything appeared to line up so perfectly, but the outcome was an unexpected disappointment. My answer is always the same. There are times in life when on the surface everything seems to be falling into place, yet the desired outcome does not complete the story we had hoped to write.
I some cases, the seemingly ‘perfect partner’ stuck around for years without any proposal for marriage. In other instances, there was an awesome interview for the dream job that ultimately was offered to someone else. I could share countless examples of how expected outcomes are sometimes derailed in our world.
We have all encountered mirages in our life, as well as the disappointment and heartbreak that follow. But if you really take a step back and reflect on your past disappointments, you will soon note that Spirit always had a much better plan with your name on it. The love you thought you lost is often replaced with a better love you never imagined possible. The position you wanted more than anything was more appropriately aligned with someone else, and instead of misplacing your gifts and talents, the new job you ultimately found was much more fulfilling than you ever thought possible.
Authentic Feelings Are Not Always ‘Sunshine And Rainbows’
What a comfortable, easy life this would be if everyone could just feel like ‘sunshine and rainbows’ all the time. The truth is that the many of the most worthwhile things in life do not come from ‘easy’ and ‘comfortable.’ And when we suppress our true feelings, it is ultimately detrimental to our health body, mind, and spirit.
Revealing our true feelings does not come easily for many of us. I am not trying to make up an excuse, but I just was not brought up that way. My parents’ generation were masters of the art of concealing their true feelings, good or bad. When I am doing a mediumship reading, and a departed parent or grandparent shows up, they often say things like, “I wish I told you more often how much I love you.”
I could count on one hand the moments in my childhood that I can remember my parents showing affection for each other in front of us children. Those of us who had been brought up in such a stoic family environment, tend to struggle when are encouraged to express our deepest emotions. As an adult, I do however see the bigger picture today. And I do feel it is necessary to express one’s feelings in a considerate and healthy way.
In my family my parents also never argued in front of us kids. My dad just gave my mom the silent treatment. We grew up thinking he was just be the ‘strong silent type.’ Consequently, I felt that this was what communication in a marriage should be like.
Of course, reality hit me badly with my first marriage, when my ex-husband and I had our first serious argument! I thought it meant the marriage was now over, because I had no coping skills or frame of reference for this kind of authentic self-expression in a relationship. I also had no clue how to have a good, healthy argument.