attitude
Change your Habits, Change Your Life!
As 2022 comes to an end and the New Year is upon is, many of us are considering how we can improve our lives and become a better version of ourselves.
Today we might be sitting with our shiny new diary or journal, or a beautiful 2022 calendar full of inspiring affirmations, in the hope it will inspire us to lead healthier, happier, more fulfilling and successful life. But the single biggest thing that we can do to change our lives for the better and really smash our goals is to change our habits.
What we habitually do is who we will ultimately become. Our daily physical habits are our metaphysical destiny. In fact, research would suggest that approximately 95% of the things people do daily are purely habitual.
From the spiritual perspective, I always look to archetype of The Archer in the Wildwood Tarot deck as the positive symbology to help me break bad habits and create new, better ones. The Archer is a genuinely motivating card that symbolizes strength, direction, aim and focus. When it comes to habits, it reminds us to focus on the positive ones and that by doing so, we will achieve our goals by hitting our target. Gaze upon his symbology, and it should help give you the strength to do so.
For example, I am a chocoholic, the results of which is clearly evident around my middle-aged waistline! How do I personally break the habit of a lifetime and develop a healthier relationship with chocolate? Well, the guidelines are the same for any other goal we may have:
Remove The Temptation
As the saying goes: ‘out of sight, out of mind.’ My household will therefore be seeing far less sugar in the kitchen cupboards in 2022. This may seem somewhat an extreme measure, but it may help to change my family’s nutritional habits for the better. It is not so easy to maintain a sweet tooth when there is nothing to reaching out for to serve as a reward or an emotional crutch.
Will A Time Machine Change Our Perspectives Forever?
A well-known television news show recently featured an astrophysicist talking about a project she was working on to turn back time and venture into the past. I was fascinated, but somewhat skeptical as to the potential success of such a mission.
She went on to explain that although we are currently experiencing the present moment, we are continuing to also look back into the past, while being in the present.
How does this work in our everyday reality? Imagine looking up at the sun. It takes as much as eight minutes for the sunlight to reach us, which means we are actually looking into the past.
The same applies when we are gazing up at the stars at night. Depending on a star’s location it can take starlight anything from four years to as much as fifteen billion years to reach Earth! So, once again we are in fact looking into the past.
I must admit it took me some time to wrap my head around this. However, once the concept made sense, I was able to grasp onto the meaning of all this.
She has been working diligently as part of a team for a number of years on a ‘time travel machine,’ for lack of a better term, that might have the capability of traveling so far back into the past, their hope is it could reach the exact time when the planet came into being! The time machine is set to stay in space for at least five years and hopefully reach a ten year time span.
Not only would its success afford humanity the privilege to see as far back as the beginning of time, but the machine also has the capability to go to other planets and determine whether there is for example, water, air, and any life forms existing on those planets.
Sometimes It’s Okay To Keep Your Distance!
Many of us have that one relative we do get along with. In every family there is a ‘Cousin John’ or an ‘Aunt Lydia’ who we simply cannot stand. Try as we might, we just cannot find it in our hearts to love them unconditionally.
In my case it is an uncle who’s views and opinions I just cannot tolerate. I despise all forms of racism, misogyny, and bigotry, and I am also an avid supporter of the LGBTQ community. I have no patience with people who criticize or belittle others for who they were born to be. It is unacceptable and despicable.
For many years now I have been consciously practicing healthy boundaries with relatives and people in general. I preach it! Healthy boundaries are vital for one’s mental health, personal growth and emotional well-being.
My Grandmother and I got along so well when she was in this life. We were like two peas in a pod. When she eventually came to live with us later in her life, there was however one issue that caused tension between us – her son.
My uncle was so out of line, in so many ways that I just could not tolerate having him anywhere near me. He is an extremely hateful man who has no qualms about freely spewing his vitriolic prejudice, verbal abuse and bigoted views in front of anyone who cares to listen, including the children in the family.
My grandmother stubbornly remained loyal to her son through it all, and she could now understand why I could not accept him. She said that it was such a shame that we could not all get along, while I felt it as a shame that he is so hateful. She would make excuses for him, saying for example that he was bullied in school. But I felt he should work on himself, instead of hating on other folks for no reason. She could not see my perspective from her way of thinking. Continue reading
Today’s Journey, Not Tomorrow’s Destination
I often hear my clients say, “If only I can meet my soulmate, then I will be happy.” Then when they meet that special person, they say they will finally be happy once they propose. Once they are married, then they cannot be completely happy until they have children.
Then, if they only one child, then can only be happy if they have a second. Or if they have two boys, they will only find lasting happiness once they also have a girl. Or they can only be happy once they have built or bought the dream house, or lost the weight, or launched their new business, and on, and on.
The worst scenario is people waiting for their retirement to finally be happy.
If you ask other people you will discover that nobody has everything they want. Most people have never had ‘everything.’ The few that might seem to have it all, usually do not. There is always something still lacking or missing. Nobody’s life is perfect.
Many of us spend our fleeting time on this planet wanting more, being insatiable, and never feeling fulfilled, content, or happy. It’s wonderful to have goals. Not having goals can be extremely depressing. But enjoying the process and journey toward achieving those goals will make them have even more valued and fulfilling.
More importantly, we are seldom grateful or appreciative for what we do already have. I have also found that not being grateful will bring us karmic lessons of appreciation, often by losing the good things in our life that we so easily disregard. I have seen that time and again with clients, friends and relatives.
We are an insatiable, greedy society. This who become millionaires, then want to be multi-millionaires., and then won’t be happy or fulfilled until they’re billionaires. When is enough, enough. We can only wear one outfit at a time, drive one car at a time and live in one house at a time.
I have so many friends who spent their children’s entire childhood chasing the career dreams and business goals, constantly being stressed, frazzled and not at all present when they do spend a little time with their kids. Then they wake up one day and realize their children are grown and gone, and they missed most of it.
Reversing The Reversals
You’re moving at a breakneck pace and everything is going like gangbusters. Good health, great job, satisfying relationship. You just moved in with the person of your dreams and you’re banking some major coin that gives you many options in life. Travel, designer clothes, flashy car with all the latest bells and whistles. You’re the belle of the ball, the center of attention, feeling like Ms Scarlett O’Hara in Gone With The Wind.
Any problems you might have, like those recurring nightmares in which you’re being chased and can’t get away, you simply disregard. You’ll rather think about it tomorrow. Every morning you simply turn a blind eye and start another glorious day. Today is good, forget about last night. No time to see the truth in the rear view mirror.
And then a global pandemic hits. Suddenly the entire world is reversed and upside down. Everywhere people are dropping out and tuning into misery. You’re stuck at home with your new live-in partner who no longer looks so shiny, neither does the new car, even with all those bells and whistles.
You’re feeling shell-shocked, overwhelmed, scared. You feel like a trapped lab rat, waiting for an insidious disease to strike. Meanwhile you are getting a crash course in relationship 101, learning about all your partner’s peccadilloes, those annoying little quirks and habits you used to find so cute. Then the awesome job goes away, and you and lab rat partner are left to fight all the time. One of you needs to leave. But neither of you can go anywhere.
All you can do is go within. Sleep becomes a refuge, until those nasty nightmares become more of a reality to you than your waking life. And now you feel like a zombie; the dead version of your former vibrant self.
This is what’s called a reversal in life. Dramatic? Yes. Depressing? Absolutely. We all encounter it from time to time, the reversals, the spiritual contrasts. Sometimes not quite so dramatic, other times even more so.
The World Is A Metaphor For Human Consciousness
The natural world around us reflects the internal evolutionary patterns of human consciousness. Seasons are a good reflection of how we as humans evolve and grow at the level of consciousness. The closer you get to the poles the climates are often cold and rigid. These climates do not support a large variety of life.
We see something similar taking place within the human mind. The more polarized and rigid someone becomes in their thinking patterns the less variety and the less diversity of life experiences take place. We can have very rigid patterns of thinking, which tend to leave us cold and static in our experiences.
As we move more toward the center of our globe, we see more diversity of life. We also begin to see seasonal changes taking place on a more regular basis. There are seasons where trees lose their leaves, animals hibernate, and activity slows down. In consciousness this could symbolize a person that is beginning to expand their consciousness. Someone willing to change and grow.
This level of consciousness that northern and southern regions represent easier it is for someone to accept the ebb and flow of life. An acceptance of both the light and the dark can emerge at this stage and people become more aware of their emotions.
The closer to the center someone gets within consciousness the more diversity and love they experience. They are not focused on polarity at all, but instead accept life as it comes. This often includes acceptance of the storms in life that are produced by the overall polarized climate.
Love, Joy And The Pursuit Of Happiness
According to the United States Declaration of Independence “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” are the inalienable birthrights of every human being given to us by our Creator, God, Source, the Divine.
Sadly, I find very few people to be successful in their pursuit of happiness. The same is true for finding love and joy. It seems many are merely stumbling through life trying to find it.
A teacher once told me life is like school. For some of us it’s like kindergarten – easy, uncomplicated, and lots of fun. For others it’s like graduate school with lots of difficulties and challenges to overcome.
Searching for joy, love and happiness does seem to be a ‘wild goose chase’ for many people. It truly is like chasing wild animals. The faster we run after it, the more it seems to flee. I don’t believe joy, love and happiness can be found. Well, at least not in the ways that many of us are hoping to find it.
Like happiness, the right to love is also the natural inheritance of every person. The well-known channeled text, A Course in Miracles, delves into the idea of love from a spiritual perspective. It states that it is impossible to teach love. Instead, the goal should be to remove the blockages or obstacles we have to allowing love’s presence in our lives.
I have seen repeated evidence of this in doing readings for many years now. Certain reading themes are repetitive and common themes are ‘finding love,’ or the ‘lack of love,’ or ‘loss of love.’ In all these readings one thing always becomes very clear: love itself is not an ‘out there’ thing. It is also not something that can be received from another person or thing.
In readings, Spirit will often say, “Love is not a feeling.” This one initially took me a while to understand myself, until I realized that love is in fact an intrinsic quality of being. It is already within each of us. We refer to it as the Higher Self, the Soul, or the Spirit. No one is ever separated from this innate love because it is an intrinsic aspect of our very being.