toxic relationship
True Love Has No Time Limit Or Deadline
We live in a busy world where most of us have gotten used to a very hurried life. Everything is on a strict schedule and time limit, because we now judge everything this way. We have become a restless society demanding instant solutions and immediate gratification in all things.
If the line is too long at the supermarket or fast food restaurant, some of us get upset. If we have to wait for our doctor when we have an appointment, we become annoyed. Some cut in front of others, or even cross streets while the light is still red, because they hate to wait.
Similarly, if we do not get an immediate reaction from our latest love interest, some of us do not become just a little restless or anxious. No, they get really upset!
If this kind of hurried, rushed way of life plagues you, then you may definitely need an major attitude adjustment. Because your naturally loving heart and your capacity for love and romance may be in serious trouble.
Maybe your heart never got the memo that there was no need to constantly hurry up and adhere to time limits and deadlines. What happened to dating? Romantic chats? Patiently anticipated expressions of affection? Dozens of love letters, and more recently emails and test messages? The joint holidays and weekends away? The looking forward to new adventures together?
What happened? What happened to living wholeheartedly in the moment? What happened to just enjoying the ride without constantly watching the calendar or the clock?
The one joy that we all desire and cherish is being loved and feeling special in someone’s eyes. To be affirmed, to be accepted and appreciated, to belong. It gives us an inner peace and happiness that cannot be found in any other way. Love and belonging is a fundamental necessity in everyone’s life. No matter how busy you are. Continue reading
Find The Eye Of The Storm
Your relationship is falling apart, you have lost your job, your finances are in a shambles, you suffer an unexpected loss due to a global pandemic. Chaos comes in many forms and at times it touches multiple areas of our lives at once.
The ripple effect starts in one area and then spreads insidiously, until every aspect of your life begins to look very bleak. Your emotional reserves are drained, confusion sets in and you feel stuck, powerless…reeling from the shock.
When things turn bad in your life this way it can have the force and power of a hurricane or tornado. It can be devastating.
Perhaps you sensed it coming. Your intuitive radar was ‘pinging’, sensing imminent danger, or maybe it caught you completely off-guard. Either way, the results are the same.
Now what? How do you get your bearings, recover your sense of direction, recharge your battery and get the inner strength to move forward?
All tropical storms have a center, or an eye. The stronger the storm the calmer the eye, which is characterized by lighter winds and a clearer sky. So, take a breath – a deep breath – and find your center. Find the eye of your storm.
Making decisions from fear or chaos always increases the strength and ferocity of the storm. Remember, all storms do pass. The beauty of life lies in the newness and change each moment offers us.
The Three Laws of Grace
There are three primary Laws of Grace that function under the overarching Law of Attraction. Grace is generally associated with divine support or spiritual help, but in this context it simply means that we are always free to choose again.
The Law of Love
The first Law of Grace is the Law of Love. The Law of Love does not refer to feelings, sentiments or emotions. Too often it is assumed that love is a feeling we get when we are with someone, but in metaphysics and spirituality love is not a feeling.
Instead, spiritual love is choosing to accept others as they are and to want what is best for them. What most of us know as ‘love’ today is actually ‘like,’ because to like someone or something is conditional. Real love, on the other hand, has no conditions. It is unconditional.
There is also a common belief about ‘love’ that can be very damaging to relationships. Sometimes we create emotional attachments to future events and declare that “this is love.” Yet, it is impossible to love a future other – either you love a person, or you do not.
When people conjure up extensive images and stories about a future version of another person and attach their mental and emotional attention to these things, they often create a strong sense of painful longing, which creates within them the desire to change the other person.
It is this painful yearning that is the key to understanding, because with the Law of Attraction like always attracts like. Painful longing can only ever attract more pain. It does not even matter how compatible two souls are in this life, if one of them is participating in such a painful longing, then pain will inevitably become the result of the relationship.
Love is unconditional acceptance and there is only one love. Therefore, Buddhists believe one cannot have friends and enemies. If you have enemies then eventually all of your friends will become enemies, and vice versa.
Work Through The Fear, Obligation And Guilt (FOG)
Reflecting on my life I have found how many of my early life experiences have subconsciously influenced me, mostly due to a lack of awareness that allowed fear, a sense of obligation and guilt to remain hidden.
These hidden influences mostly come from my formative years and became obstacles I had to repeatedly struggle with in my adult life with regards relationships, career, finances, family and community.
Once I discovered these non-empowering beliefs, it was time for me to get out of the FOG (Fear, Obligation, Guilt). In hindsight, several things I was unaware of in my family’s dynamics, were actually ‘seeds’ hidden beneath the surface that in time sprouted into personal challenges and self-sabotage.
Fear
Fear and insecurity are frequent visitors for many of us in all areas of life. I was constantly focused on the negative and worst-case scenarios. This is because our brain is wired this way for the purpose of survival. Much of it also depends on our upbringing. So, we must recognize this and catch ourselves early on, in order to shift our thoughts and emotions in a positive direction.
We must be cognitive of our behaviors and explore where in our life we have learned these negative, fear-based responses. Fear is a natural part of life, but can easily become a ‘whack-a-mole’ of frustration, anxiety, uncertainty and indecision, always showing up at the most inconvenient times.
Still Hanging On To The Wrong Person?
Are you still hanging on to the wrong person? I know you adore him. I know you love her. I understand that you believe you are soulmates and ‘meant to be.’
But be aware that your beloved has free will. If they are not exactly alignment with you, no matter how you strongly feel about them, nothing will come of your ‘situationship.’ They are on their own journey and you cannot will someone to be your lover or life partner. It is nothing more than the beginning of a colossal heartbreak.
I have witnessed many love-struck people hang on for years to someone that has either left them for good, or kept stringing them along. Some of them have even married and had children with someone else, and yet, they still hang on. They often fervently believe their love interest will someday return to them and then they will live happily ever after. Well, the truth of the matter is that they will not. The other person has made their choice and walked away for a reason.
This new year, with all that has been going on in the world, it may be time to take a few deep breaths and have a self-reflective moment. Take a good, hard look at your life choices and your relationships.
If you are making unwise, self-sabotaging choices, consider what it may be that is not feeding your soul? What is it that is really missing in your life? Maybe it is time to release what no longer serves you. Simply let it go. Find your inner peace, and just be happy and content with yourself and who you truly are.
As a psychic advisor, I encounter the good, the bad and the ugly. I have seen much trauma and damage done, sometimes almost irreparable, to people in toxic relationships and love obsessions. Marriages of several years simply falling apart or ‘trusted’ partner walking out with zero notice. I have watched many go through failed relationship after failed relationship, always with the same results. The result is always the same: excruciating heartbreak.
When the victims of these bad relationship choices are encouraged to do some soul-searching, to see what it is inside of them that is compelling them to go back to the same type of person, time and time again, they are offended and become angry.
Manifesting A Better Life Starts With You
Anyone can manifest what they want and need in life. It all comes down to energy because we are spirit energy in human form. The energy we put out; is the energy we receive back. It pretty much is that simple. But we also need to believe this, for it helps a great deal in bringing it closer to us.
So, how does this energy swapping process work? Well, it begins with focusing on something that you really want or need. Then think more on it, request it, wish it, desire it. This is called the process of manifesting or deliberate creating or cosmic ordering. You are putting your wish or desire out into to the Universe, and Universe, Spirit, God, the Divine receives this information and ultimately brings it back to you in manifested form as a gift or blessing.
Some people are more in-tune with the Universe than others, or more aligned with Spirit, and therefore able to manifest more easily and quickly. But while some of us believe wholeheartedly and have absolutely no doubt, others may be more hesitant or uncertain about what to believe, or not. Fortunately, no matter where you fall on the belief spectrum, you can still use manifesting to assist you in life, but your results will vary based on your faith.
One can manifest with positive thinking, prayer, affirmations or meditation, but I find that focused visualizations, creating a vision board, and writing down your wishes, seem to make it even more powerful! It’s as if the Universe says, “Wow, she is really serious about this, and asking so sincerely, let me reward her efforts!”
Sometimes manifesting can grind to a complete halt for us. We all have to grow, and learn, and evolve spiritually. If we do not do this, the Universe is not too happy when we repeat the same old patterns, make the same old mistakes, and show little effort to become a better person, or a more evolved soul. We cannot expect to receive spiritual rewards or gifts until we make the necessary changes. Successful manifesting goes hand in hand with personal growth and spiritual expansion. Continue reading