habits
Multi-Tasking Does Not Cultivate A Quality Life
I’m sure there has been a time in your life when you may have been too active on a hot summer, day without adequately hydrating, or juggling far too many tasks at once without taking a break. While you may have crossed the finish line, or pleased your boss by checking off all the tasks you completed, your sense of well-being was probably rock bottom, and your nerves frazzled. You possibly also questioned whether or not the best version of yourself showed up for life the next day.
Although many of us have found ways to multi-task our hectic lives, research is increasingly showing that effective multi-tasking is in fact a myth. Working on multiple projects at once doesn’t necessarily make us high achievers, or a successful super humans. Multitasking for most individuals merely replaces quality with quantity, and often leaves us feeling overwhelmed and disconnected from our deeper purpose.
As a spiritualist, I make it a practice not to judge how others achieve their everyday objectives and goals. But I do counsel many people who seem to have traded quantity for quality in their lives, and are missing out on the gift of savoring the sweet taste of personal achievement that is purposely focused and uninterrupted.
While old habits are tough to break, each of us has the innate capacity to build new processes within our mind. Psychological tools, such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) for example, can be used to re-program the mind to think differently.
Metaphysics and New Thought spirituality also teaches that through positive thinking we can manifest healthier outcomes in all areas of our lives. Many indigenous peoples also have a long tradition of spiritual practices, such as vision quests, dream interpretation, divination, and rituals and ceremonies, to help seekers find their best path.
Meditation Is For Everyone
Meditation can easily be a part of your daily life. It is a simple spiritual practice. What is difficult is to change one’s habits.
There are many variants of meditation, some of which you probably know and may have tried. If so, you may have discovered that the difficulties many of us face, when attempting to adopt meditation as a spiritual practice, are usually not related to the meditation itself. More often we are ‘fighting’ with our own minds. We are competing within, for the control, or the freedom of our mind.
Our enemies in this context are short-term rewards: leisure activities, such as watching TV, browsing social media, snacking, or anything that helps our neurons remain lazy. In these activities, attention is scattered and unfocused.
The mind thus learns to be ‘random.’ One could compare this state of mind to the behavior of a wild monkey. This restlessness has no practical purpose – it is just ‘noise.’ And it is happening all the time. We may feel we are actually doing something, but we are just passing the time.
Meditation puts a stop to this unnecessary mental activity. Although in meditation, one does not actively seek to stop thinking, one tries to generate the conditions in which thought is reduced, and the mind now merely observes whatever is happening: an idea, a feeling, a sensation. It is all just observed.
No More Procrastination
Do you also procrastinate? Procrastination is the avoidance of doing a task that needs to be accomplished by a certain deadline. Or do you sometimes intentionally delay the completion of a task, despite knowing it might have negative consequences? Ninety five percent of people procrastinate at some point in life.
To break the habit of procrastination we must find some self-compassion when a task at hand causes us stress just thinking about tackling it. Some tasks just seem too big or overwhelming, and we can’t seem to motivate ourselves to get it done.
Procrastination makes most people feel guilt and shame. For some extreme procrastinators, negative feelings may trigger another reason not to complete a task. Only to become a vicious cycle of self-defeat. Most procrastinators tend to put off endings, as well as beginnings and commitments.
I have a close friend that has all kinds of ideas for a book she is writing. While collecting material, she put of starting the actual writing for three years. She felt she needed several points of view about the subject matter. She always needed one more.
Now, 13 years later, she can’t seem to stop writing the same book. The idea of being an author just feels so good to her now. The added benefit of this is that whenever she is asked what she has been up to, she loves to say, “I’m writing a book.”.
Listen To Your Guides And Angels
When life frustrates you, when people anger you, or the world puts you in a state of fear, stress or worry, take a few minutes to sit quiet and ask your guides and angels to take the weight off your shoulders. Ask them to bring you calm and to just simply let you know that it will be okay.
Your angels and guides are with you each and every day. They speak to you in the pit of your stomach, your gut feelings, your ‘intuition spot.’ Feel their presence around you and inside of you. Feel them tell you that they are surrounding you with white light and love.
Your spirit guides and angels aim to help, never to hinder. They are there to love you and keep your soul filled with loving energy. Feel them tell you that they are filling you with their overwhelming love and peace. And then simply allow them to relieve the negativity that is keeping you stuck.
I’m sure they shake their heads once in a while, and go ‘what the heck!’ But they do not judge you. Your guides and angels never chastise you. Only you tend to judge yourself, so allow that part of you to go as well. You are only to love yourself unconditionally, just as your guides and angels do. You are perfectly perfect as you are. This is a phrase I use often when talking to my clients. Your angels see you as perfect, so why can’t you?
You are always in a state of transition and growth. It is what makes us human and different from other species. A bird simply knows how to build a nest, lay eggs, hatch them. And when their offspring eventually leave the nest, they instinctively go and repeat the process all over again. They do not worry for anything. If they are hungry, they grab a worm out of the ground or a seed from a plant. If it is raining, they simply hunker down in a bush or tree. It is an inborn response.
Spirit Says You Can’t Please Everyone
I have learned that people-pleasing is something that one simply cannot do. People must learn to do it for themselves. We cannot please everyone all of the time, and some people will never be satisfied anyway, no matter how much time, energy and love we offer them. They are simply not ever going to be happy, no matter what. Period.
I can think of various situations where one might feel the need to coddle and people-please those we love and care for, but in the end it will only bring us self dis-ease and stress.
For example, the child who tries to please and be there and do everything for the parent. Why is this a bad idea? Well, the parent may give up if their child tries to do everything for them. Especially if they are older and trying to find themselves and re-establish their own life, after taking care of everyone else their whole life.
Sometimes we can smother an ageing parent with kindness, by trying to do too much for them. When we do this, it makes them second guess their ability to do things for themselves. It may even cause them to worry, have anxiety, or become fearful of living.
It is good to be there for one’s elderly parents, however there is a line that can be crossed if we try and do too much and make them feel like they cannot do certain things anymore. Sure, if their driver’s license has been taken from them, for example, and they cannot see well anymore, then obviously driving them places makes sense. But, if they are still able to function normally, then let them!
Are We There Yet?
Are we there yet? It’s okay to ask. The answer, however, should always be no. If we become preoccupied with destination, we lose sight of the joy and purpose of the journey in the first place. When we honor the journey, we are able to keep on the path of forward motion.
Life itself is the journey. We learn the hard lessons, and finally understand that it’s a never-ending process. Often things occur in the guise of mistakes, failures, misunderstandings, hurts. But in truth, not learning from these events is the only failure. And if you don’t learn it the first time, it is highly likely the lesson will repeat itself, over and over again, until you actually do learn it.
When our behavior and actions change, we convert what we have learned into wisdom. For some people the process is a lifelong quest, while others utilize what they have learned and it moves them along quickly. Some people need to go deeper within themselves to make progress.
It is always good to ask if we are there yet. Especially at the beginning of every journey, or when the learned lessons tell us there is more work to be done – inner work to get to the very core of our being. For some people inner work can be very frightening, as many of us deeply suppress the things that we don’t want to deal with. But to complete the journey we must peel away the layers, like peeling an onion.
The Spiritual Symbolism Of The Pelican
When a bird flies directly onto your path, or you see images or photos of the same bird repeatedly, within a relatively short space of time, this is often a spiritual sign that the energy of this bird is calling or guiding you.
I live on the coast and I am lucky to be able to watch various seabirds, and encounter other birds drawn to the local water ways. The pelican is one bird that has specifically caught my attention. The day I was inspired to paint this amazing bird, he literally strutted down the hallway of my home!
Even to this day, pelican continues to literally soar into my experience whenever I need to draw on his wisdom. Even though they seem large and clumsy, there is something gentle and caring about their nature. If pelican has waddled or soared onto your path, let his wisdom and symbolism guide your way.
I started building my connection with the pelican’s energy by observing and sketching the local birds. Through the process I found a sense of awe for the pelican’s beauty, which was a shift in my perception, as I had never before considered them to be very attractive birds.
I also noticed they followed a set routine, and similar flight paths, depending on the weather. It inspired me to become more aware of my own patterns and habits. At this time my work schedule had become somewhat unbalanced and dysfunctional, without me being aware of the impact. Pelican taught me that it is vital for my self-care to ensure that I work within a routine and structure that better supports my creative outlets and energy levels.