choices
Making A Meaningful Change
Most of us have been struggling with stress, anxiety and depression over the past two years. Whatever your personal struggles are, they are real and valid. The pandemic has been affecting everyone differently.
It is important to acknowledge your feelings and deal with it. Ignoring your struggles will only allow it to become bigger issues. Stress and trauma takes its toll on all of us, especially if left unattended. The best thing you can do for yourself and the people around you is to process it and work towards healing.
It is also vital to understand that your joy and happiness is not dependent on other people, material things, or external circumstances. It can only be found within yourself. And often the only way to access this happiness and joy within is to make some real, meaningful changes in your life.
Many people never find their joy and happiness, because they do not know what brings them joy and makes them truly happy. This is the big question. Look within and find makes you happiest. Then concentrate on that. Make a plan and start working towards it. It may sound simplistic, but it will soon begin to manifest in your life if you believe it.
For example, if you want to be in a happy, healthy relationship and you are tired of the bad relationship you are currently in, decide to make the change. Simply choose to be happy. You deserve to be happy and to be loved. Decide that you want to make it happen. It really is as simple as that.
Learning To Check In With Spirit
It is likely you have a friend, co-worker or relative that is in an unhealthy or even abusive relationship. We all know people who are kind, sweet, giving, and thoughtful, who become involved with emotionally absent, dysfunctional, abusive partners.
I know someone who is currently in such a situation. Her loving nature and generosity far exceeds anything I have ever experienced in another person, and I count myself exceptionally lucky to have her as my friend.
We have known each other for many years, but have only recently developed a much closer relationship, because we have both experienced a deep loss in recent years. Grief and bereavement becomes somewhat more tolerable if one has a close friendship in which you can safely express and share your sorrow.
Judging by my friend’s gentle, kind nature one might expect she would be with a life partner who has similar traits and appreciates her, but shockingly she is in one of the most toxic relationships I have ever encountered. She is not being physically assaulted, but she is subjected to unbearable verbal and emotional abuse.
It has been going on for a very long time. I continue to offer her my unconditional love and support but feel at a loss beyond that. I have asked her why she is still in that situation with so very little to indicate there will ever be any miraculous changes? But she has always evaded these questions.
Recently, she finally confessed her reason for staying with him: she is worried about what people might think and say if she leaves him! I asked her what people? She replied, her friends and family. They might find fault with her for breaking up the family.
Recycle Your Blessings This Winter Season
As we approach winter in the northern hemisphere, let us be inspired by the seasonal change. Look around and observe nature as it prepares itself for a period of dormancy that leads to renewal and rebirth in the spring.
Change is the catalyst for growth in our lives. Some choose to think of winter as an unpleasant, ‘lifeless’ time, but in truth it is a golden opportunity to connect with the deeper realms of our mind and soul.
Embrace the profound stillness that this season offers and use the longer nights as opportunity for conscious self-reflection. Sit with this stillness and claim your majestic place on the sacred throne that was created solely for you.
Take back your personal power from the turbulence of the outer world and allow the chatter to grow quiet. Trust that in the midst of your most pressing thoughts and that which nags your soul, there is the Divine right path to oneness, healing, balance, peace, reconciliation, spiritual recognition, and soul empowerment.
Along with the obvious holiday cheer, this is one of the many gifts of the winter season; connecting to the eternal flame of the universe that shines on each of us.
As I ponder the personal changes I wish to embark on, I am reminded that nothing new can happen without letting go of the old. Many years ago, a dear friend implemented an annual winter ritual of clearing her closet of personal items she no longer desired. This is always performed just before the New Year.
I recall asking whether she was maybe acting too hastily in letting go of some of her prized possessions, as some of the discarded items were relatively new. She responded that she was creating space for new gifts to enter her life, while passing the old on to others who might be blessed by receiving it. My friend essentially spoke of recycling her blessings, a concept that was new to me at the time. And in doing so, she created a special karma for herself that opened the path for new delights to enter her life.
To Hate Is A Self-Destructive Choice
When I was in middle school, around the age of 13 or so, I remember an older, more popular girl used to constantly bully me. I also remember coming home from school and telling my mother about it. I told my mother that I hated that girl, but she very sternly said, “Oh no, you don’t hate anyone!”
I defiantly replied, “Oh yes, I do!”
My mother then patiently replied, “Okay, well if you are going to insist on hating her, please go and do it somewhere else, young lady. I do not want to hear about it anymore!”
She never explained to me why she felt it was inappropriate for me to hate anyone. I didn’t figure this out until much later in my life.
My own daughter is now also a teenager and she sometimes comes home from school with similar complaints. A girl at school has been spreading false rumors about her. Just like I did all those years ago, my daughter also told me how she hated this girl. And I replied the same way my mother did, except I also explained that hate only breeds more hate.
To hate someone or something only hurts you, no one else. My daughter hating this person she feels has wronged her, will only cause her to hurt herself more with negative emotion, every time she thinks about this person. Every time she tells a friend or family member about this girl, she will be refueling her own negative fire. Thus, she will only end up hurting herself more.
The other girl does not feel every occasion my daughter is upset, or reliving the hurtful situation that occurred. In reality, my daughter is punishing herself every time she thinks about how this person wronged her. This is what we all tend to do, when we find ourselves in similar or hurtful situations.
Your Beliefs Shape Your Reality
In metaphysics and alternative spirituality the idea that our belief or faith shapes our reality is a well-known concept. This notion is found again and again in sacred texts, ancient religions, and wisdom traditions.
In The Bible, for example, Jesus says, “With a mustard seed of faith you can move a mountain,” and the Buddha says, “The mind is everything, what we think we become.” These are just two examples among many others.
What is a belief? It is simply a thought that we choose to think again and again. Faith is when a belief becomes established as a pattern.
The mind, our consciousness, is where belief occurs. Whatever we choose to believe about ourselves, and about life, becomes true for us. The thoughts we hold in our mind shapes our reality.
‘Old school’ belief and faith is however a little different and maybe less trendy than the modern idea of the Law of Attraction and our ability to ‘manifest,’ that has become so popular in recent years in spiritual circles and the metaphysical community. Yet, it it is still an important spiritual principle.
Our beliefs and biases work as a filter within the brain to organize our experiences to confirm a belief or bias. For example, if someone has a belief that their partner is aloof, or not present in the relationship, their brain will filter out those experiences where their partner is actually active and present in the relationship.
In this way the brain confirms its own biases. Even if their partner is present, caring, kind and open to communication, their chosen belief will overshadow their reality. Continue reading
Surrendering Your Free Will To Divine Intervention
To have free will means to have choices, to act at your own discretion. Choices in what? Well, in everything. From eating ice cream for breakfast, to establishing a humanitarian mission to support the homeless.
The ice cream is a simple choice, while the non-profit requires significant planning, a vision, a passion and purpose, as well as personal sacrifices, effort and action.
But both will have consequences. Eating deserts for breakfast may lead to weight gain and even long-term health problems. Helping the homeless will make the world a better, safer and happier place.
Between these two extreme examples, there are a myriad of life paths, choices, decisions, options, and potential experiences. It is what we call life and relationships. In all these possibilities the power of free will always exists.
You also have the free will choice in life of taking things too personally, being too controlling or demanding, being lazy or discontented, playing the victim…or living your life with courage, joy and gratitude.
One of the most prevalent challenges many people is their unwillingness to accept the principles of co-creation. To live a happier, more peaceful life we have to accept that just because we have free will in our own life choices, the world we live in is a co-creation. We do not only choose for ourselves, but we also choose everyday along with others. Every day is an act of co-creation. And not everyone always chooses the same things. We must learn to accept this.
Go with the flow? Never, you might say, I need to be always in control. I call the shots! The paradigm shift of realizing that I am spirit in a physical body is what changed it for me. Consider what your life might look like today had you more often simply trusted the Divine, Universe, God, Creator, Spirit, Source to let things unfold for the greater good, at the right time and in the right way? Well, it’s never too late to try. The results just might surprise you.
The Wisdom Of Intuitive Eating
I remember reading an article many years ago about a research study conducted with children suffering from various nutritional deficiencies and food allergies. The scientists invited about 20 of these kids into a room with a table on which there was a variety of foods on display. They allowed each child to help themselves to any of the food they preferred. The outcome was astounding!
Each child chose a selection of food that their body naturally would tolerate the best. In other words, they instinctively chose foods that would not a bad for them or cause an allergic reaction. Furthermore, the children also chose more foods containing the nutrients their little bodies were lacking.
This confirmed for me the fact that our intuition or inner guidance system is not merely something we rely on when we are facing major life challenges, or when we are engaging in some form of spiritual practice. Intuition guides us every day in everything we do.
Intuitive eating is very much about honoring the temple which houses our soul. I believe we could potentially become nutritionally much healthier if we learn to trust our intuition more when we make dietary choices, instead of following fad diets and food trends.
Intuitive eating is about challenging modern society’s ‘food police,’ as well as the negative self-talk about eating and food choices many of us tend to engage in.
Intuitive eaters soon find that they eat just the right amount of various foods to nourish and satisfy their body, as they learn to truly recognize their body’s signals. Once you can do this, you are on your way to building a healthy relationship with food.
Be gentle with yourself. Avoid those magazines and influencer images on social media that prompts you to put pressure on yourself to look a certain way. Don’t give energy to such things. Instead, listen to your own body. You are uniquely you, and so is your body. When you express self-love within, you will also express it outwardly. Self-love ‘turns head’s like no designer outfit can!