patterns
How To Boost Your Confidence
Sometimes I wish that confidence was for sale! Feeling confident can make all the difference, for example, when you are anxious about accepting a social invitation, without the need for spending hours of internal dialogue trying to convince yourself it will be okay for you to attend. Confidence also means being able to easily decide what to wear for the big night out, and so on.
Indeed, I have marveled at other people’s ability to do such things with ease. However, these very same people are no different than you or me. It is just that they have mastered their mindset with regards being confident, and so can you! Here’s how:
Maintain Healthy Boundaries
Have you noticed certain people in your life encroaching on your space and time? If so, it may be time to implement some polite, yet firm boundaries. By doing so, you should find that this really builds your confidence in both professional and personal relationships, and you no longer feel drained or undermined by specific individuals you have to share some of your time and space with.
Practice Self-Awareness
We hear a lot these days about being more self-aware, but just what is meant by this? Well, it simply means having the ability to recognize when you are falling into a pattern of self-sabotage. Let’s say, for example, you are due to meet a person who continually makes significant demands on you, but you find great difficulty in saying no to them. By learning the art of becoming more self-aware, you can plan, in advance, how to remain strong and firm with this particular individual, so that your relationship with them becomes far healthier.
Through The Looking Glass
We tend to not see ourselves accurately. We too often choose to focus on our shortcomings and weaknesses, such as we perceive them to be. And I believe we are all guilty of this. I have not in all my years met anyone who was truly satisfied with themselves – until it was sometimes too late.
I was just as guilty of this as anyone else. My childhood was one that I wouldn’t have wished on my worst enemy. I was abandoned by both parents when I was very young. I was raised by an aunt and uncle, who took pleasure in reminding me that my parents did not love me. My aunt also took every opportunity to beat the daylights out of me, while my uncle did nothing.
When I hit puberty, several older males in my ‘family’ began to stalk and harass me. I’d go into the kitchen and soon find myself backed up against a wall. Nobody believed me. Nobody did anything to stop it – not even when I was raped at 16 by a family friend’s son, who was deemed to be a “good boy” and “would never do anything like that.”
I could go on and on about all the horrible things that happened to me, but once I turned that momentous age of 16, and having had the experiences that I have had, I left my aunt and uncle’s home. I went to live with my boyfriend, his sister and their mom. When I left, my uncle dumped all my clothes on the front lawn.
Getting To The Core Of The Matter
One of the many benefits of a good psychic reading is the clarity it can bring. Relationships and situations can take many confusing twists and turns and it’s easy to get lost in the behavior or chaos of the moment. Getting to the heart of the matter involves the psychic advisor looking at your core energy.
Your core energy is the root of you. It is the true you, complete with your innate gifts, skills and talents. Layered on top of that are your experiences, challenges, fears, childhood wounds and past relationships gone wrong. The more scars there are on this layer, the thicker it is and the more it impacts your choices, decisions and behavior.
A psychic advisor will use her skill set to discern what is really going on underneath for all parties involved. A gifted reader will get ‘inside’ and find out what is limiting the success of the relationship, or situation. This is why an advisor may often bring forward information about you, or the subject, that you did not necessarily ask for, but is relevant to increasing your understanding and finding resolution to your situation.
When Your Man Is Not Ready To Commit
I often hear how wonderful the guy is that she is dating… if only he would commit to taking their relationship to the next level! If a woman is not satisfied with the way things are going and what she is getting from the relationship, should she continue to wait for him?
By patiently waiting for him against your better judgment, he only learns that he can get away with his lack of commitment, especially if he feels comfortable with what he is getting from the relationship. This way a pattern is formed.
So, how do you avoid wasting some of the best years of your life waiting on a guy that is never going to commit? well, right from the start you tell him what your looking for and what your expectations are. But handle it carefully, after all you don’t want to scare him away before things even get off the ground!
But do let him know how you feel about dating, long-term relationships, commitment, marriage, children, and whatever else may be important to you. This will inform him, so that you have a better shot at being on the same page. If he starts to make excuses, or says that he is not interested in a long-term commitment, at least not right now, then accept his words as the truth.
The Power Of Observation
In this busy world we rarely take the time to observe things around us. Most people see and feel things only through their own personal lens. Of course, it is only normal to identify with your own feelings and the things you have seen, heard or experienced. But sometimes so much of what we believe as reality is the only way we will accept it. It is necessary in some situations to take a step back and observe a situation, look at all sides of it and try to remain neutral.
I have worked with some clients in my hypnosis practice who just can’t seem to look at a situation from a different perspective. It is much easier for people to observe someone that looks much like them on a television screen playing out a scenario. They may see, feel even hear things that could not be recalled at the time of the event. Another way is to view the scene in a different way in order to rewrite the script to achieve a different outcome by observing. The incident with a different outcome may show the possibility of different realities.
For example, when there is a car accident and four or five people witness and observe it. When questioned, the people usually all have a very different account of what happened. Through their own personal lenses they believe it as gospel. But is it really?
What You Might Not Know About Reincarnation
Reincarnation, or the rebirth of our spiritual form into different bodies over time, is a broadly accepted concept across many spiritual traditions and cultures. It is a natural extension of the Law of Karma, which tells us that there is no cause without effect, nor effect without a cause. But beyond the basic concept, many of us don’t know very much about this eternal cycle.
Nature is full of these ongoing cycles: the planets in their orbits, the seasons here on Earth. We, in both our physical and spiritual states, are no different. At the moment of conception, our cells begin to multiply at exponential, and highly patterned rates, until the time comes for our physical birth. It is widely believed that each soul, or reincarnated spirit, enters the body when we first draw breath.
It is the agents of karma, among them the angels, who decide, for specific reasons, which souls will occupy each new body. Perhaps there are lessons to be learned or obstacles to overcome. The point is, it is believed that we ourselves do not choose.
In many spiritual traditions, such as Buddhism, the purpose of reincarnation is such that each soul may learn the requisite number of lessons in physical form to ultimately achieve enlightenment, or nirvana. One truth not commonly known is that many more souls exist in the Universe than there are physical people on Earth. A soul may not be reborn immediately following one death; it may wait for hundreds or thousands of years.
An Attitude Of Gratitude
I find that people who don’t appreciate what they have, often have their gifts and blessings challenged, or even lose it. And obsessing about what we don’t have can lead to depression and anxiety. It certainly does not help you to attract more into your life.
So, consider shifting from thinking about what you don’t have, and what you want and goals, and instead try an ‘attitude of gratitude.’ This is a dramatic shift. Changing from thinking about what we don’t have to instead feeling grateful for what we do have, what we have been given, and what we have already achieved, changes what we attract.
This shift in thinking does not mean you can’t have goals, it just means you don’t feel an emptiness associated with those goals. Nothing is missing. There is just more to be gained. You already have the sundae… it doesn’t need that cherry on top. A cherry would just be a nice bonus!
I’ve seen people become so obsessed with a timeline for getting married, for example, that they soon did get married… but to the wrong person! The universe knows your true destiny. It knows what you need and when. Try to be patient and trust the flow.
Putting 90% of your focus on feeling grateful for what you do have and 10% on what you would still like to obtain, will completely change your outlook on life, as well as your physical and emotional health.
Continue reading