Are We There Yet?

Are we there yet? It’s okay to ask. The answer, however, should always be no. If we become preoccupied with destination, we lose sight of the joy and purpose of the journey in the first place. When we honor the journey, we are able to keep on the path of forward motion.

Life itself is the journey. We learn the hard lessons, and finally understand that it’s a never-ending process. Often things occur in the guise of mistakes, failures, misunderstandings, hurts. But in truth, not learning from these events is the only failure. And if you don’t learn it the first time, it is highly likely the lesson will repeat itself, over and over again, until you actually do learn it.

When our behavior and actions change, we convert what we have learned into wisdom. For some people the process is a lifelong quest, while others utilize what they have learned and it moves them along quickly. Some people need to go deeper within themselves to make progress.

It is always good to ask if we are there yet. Especially at the beginning of every journey, or when the learned lessons tell us there is more work to be done – inner work to get to the very core of our being. For some people inner work can be very frightening, as many of us deeply suppress the things that we don’t want to deal with. But to complete the journey we must peel away the layers, like peeling an onion.

When we remove the mask and illusions lurking in our body, mind, and spirit, we start to realize that all of our actions and behaviors have a consequence or reaction, good and bad. A lot of people are simply fooling themselves when they think that what they do has no impact on their life, or the life of others. Once you start the inner work, you will no longer accept the illusion.

This is as true in everyday life as it is in battle: we are given one life and the decision is ours whether to wait for circumstances to make up our mind, or whether to act, and in acting, to live ~ Omar Bradley

Most of us are aware of the things that are harmful to us. Unhealthy, processed foods, too much screen time, cigarette smoking, toxic relationships. Yet, many of us continue to engage in such things, and we are really good at fooling ourselves into thinking it is not really detrimental to our body, mind and spirit. We are really good at convincing ourselves that it won’t happen to me. I’m not as bad as the next guy. It is just too hard for us to look critically at our behavior and admit what we are doing to ourselves. We are not always strong enough to resist.

The reason it is hard to admit it to ourselves, is because it is impossible to acknowledge what is going on, and then not take some sort of action to fix it. Most of the time it’s just easier to go with the status quo. We pretend to be ignorant, so the behavior continues to perpetuate the illusion.

The first step to change our behavior is to admit the truth to ourselves. We may think that we are fooling ourselves, and everyone around us, but it always comes back to the fact. In the end we must live with our choices and the face in the mirror. Often the change comes with health challenges that force us to change the way we live once and for all, when it is no longer a matter of choice. In these instances if we do not change how we live the alternative is dreadful health, or death.

I had an uncle who was told he only had six months to live if he continued to abuse alcohol at the rate he did every day. Initially he stopped drinking for eight months, but then returned to his old habits. Six months to the day he passed away. Our life on Earth only lasts as long as our mind and body continues to function.

So, how does one create change, before it is too late? Begin by taking responsibility for your actions and your choices. You may find it very hard at times to face your own demons. The more you practice, the easier it is to go within and meet your inner self. Each person has a different experience – that is what makes your life unique. Embrace who you are and the person you will become.

The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward ~ Amelia Earhart

Observe yourself and others for healthy life choices to use as a model. Meditate or pray, and seek council before taking action. Meditation and conscious breathing are great ways to go within and calm the mind. The more you become aware of your breathing the deeper the breath becomes. It’s all about practice. Set very clear boundaries for yourself and others. Limit your time around negative energy. Practice the golden rule, especially for yourself: treat yourself like you would like others to treat you, and vice versa.

By living a more conscious, mindful life, you will no longer feel the need to ask, “Are we there yet?” You will know you have come full circle, that you have indeed arrived.