self-trust
Let Your Authentic Self Shine
Most people at some point change something about ourselves in the hope of being better liked or accepted by others. Whether it’s a group of friends, a potential romantic partner, or the manager at work, there is constant pressure to conform and fit in. But in the long run, does this help? The truth is: it really doesn’t.
The notion of simply being your authentic self is challenging in an era where everyone seems to be seeking approval and attention. Therefore, the authentic self or the true version of our soul is something one hardly sees in the digital era of social media, influencers, likes, and followers.
However, we may think that a person we see online is someone others won’t like. Maybe our internal critic sees that person as ‘too much’ of something or ‘not enough’ of another. But we are often mistaken, as someone being true to themselves and keeping it real is what most people are spontaneously drawn to.
You might feel like you’re the only strange person at work, or the black sheep of your family, but you’re not the only one. There are thousands of ‘odd’ people out there right now with the same doubts as you!
The old saying ‘there’s a lid for every pot’ is always good to keep in mind. Your authentic self is just what someone else has been looking for. If you feel you don’t fit in with the crowd, take a step back and ask yourself whether you truly want to be part of it anyway? Knowing your true value and finding the things most important to you, will help determine who you want to surround yourself with.
It’s also important to set healthy boundaries. If you feel peer pressured into joining a group, or liking something simply to fit in, ask yourself if this is true to your core. Does it resonate with your authentic self?
Learning To Truly Be With Yourself
A fellow psychic encouraged me many years ago in a reading to be ‘with myself’ and not just ‘by myself.’ There was a difference she explained, as this was a process of getting to know our own true essence. But being yourself can be an uncomfortable pathway for introspection! It is a lot easier to distract yourself with work, entertainment, chores, socializing and all the other ways we tend to divert our attention away from looking within.
A wise client told me recently that it was during the recent pandemic lockdowns that her journey towards true self-love really began. My clients are often my most important teachers, as they prompt me at times to look deeper into a situation.
She had been going through intense periods of intense reminiscing, especially regarding relationships. Most of her flashbacks related to two significant past relationships which, after investing so much of herself, had not worked out.
One of her partners just didn’t want to commit and was wrapped up in a materialistic obsession of striving to achieve business success. The other, whom she loved very much, left her for another woman.
Ironically, after years of loneliness and looking for ways to fill that void, this ex she whom she used to love so much, recently got back in touch with her. Apparently, he wants to be a part of her life again, once he´s finally sorted out his disastrous relationship with the woman he left her for.
But she now feels she has healed, forgiven him, and truly fallen in love with her own company, and therefore she wouldn’t want him in her space too much, and that any future moments they do spend together will be on her terms.
She has nailed it when it comes to truly being ‘with yourself,’ instead of lonely ´by yourself.’
Learning To Check In With Spirit
It is likely you have a friend, co-worker or relative that is in an unhealthy or even abusive relationship. We all know people who are kind, sweet, giving, and thoughtful, who become involved with emotionally absent, dysfunctional, abusive partners.
I know someone who is currently in such a situation. Her loving nature and generosity far exceeds anything I have ever experienced in another person, and I count myself exceptionally lucky to have her as my friend.
We have known each other for many years, but have only recently developed a much closer relationship, because we have both experienced a deep loss in recent years. Grief and bereavement becomes somewhat more tolerable if one has a close friendship in which you can safely express and share your sorrow.
Judging by my friend’s gentle, kind nature one might expect she would be with a life partner who has similar traits and appreciates her, but shockingly she is in one of the most toxic relationships I have ever encountered. She is not being physically assaulted, but she is subjected to unbearable verbal and emotional abuse.
It has been going on for a very long time. I continue to offer her my unconditional love and support but feel at a loss beyond that. I have asked her why she is still in that situation with so very little to indicate there will ever be any miraculous changes? But she has always evaded these questions.
Recently, she finally confessed her reason for staying with him: she is worried about what people might think and say if she leaves him! I asked her what people? She replied, her friends and family. They might find fault with her for breaking up the family.
The Healing Power Of Positive Self-Talk
Most people indulge more in negative self-talk, than positive. But self-talk is not supposed to be negative and overly critical. We are supposed to use it to encourage, empower and motivate ourselves to achieve success and follow our dreams.
Our brain has the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and what is known in hypnosis as the critical factor of mind. This critical factor is that part of our consciousness that checks and filters every through and idea that enters our mind. It is like the gatekeeper or the guardian between the conscious mind and the subconscious. That is how hypnosis works – it is a way to bypass the critical factor so that we can access the subconscious and reprogram it with new information and insights for healing and self-empowerment.
The role of the critical factor is to protect our mind, but this is not always a good thing. Because of the job the critical mind is tasked to do, it tends to be critical of everything. It is unfortunately also that part of our brain that says we are not worthy or deserving, that we cannot do things, or achieve things.
I cannot get the job I really want.
I’m not worthy of a happy, healthy relationship.
I am not smart and pretty enough.
People just don’t like me.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
The one big problem with the critical factor is that it does not always see or hear things the way they really are. It can convince of things that are not true at all. For example, it may you that others are trying to get you fired from a job, when in fact the boss is trying to help you keep your job.
Technology Does Not Make Love Any Easier
I have personally found over many years of falling in love myself and having been in both good and bad relationships, as well as doing love and relationship readings for thousands of clients all over the world, that romantic love is more about personal soul growth, spiritual evolution and enlightenment than anything else. I find that only once we have learned certain life lessons and spiritual insights, especially with regards self-love, are we truly ready and able to love others unconditionally. Only then you can truly love someone one else, and have them love you equally in return. When this finally happens it is a lovely thing indeed, but in today’s world it is becoming be a rare thing.
Having a tight-knit, loving family or a lasting romantic relationship has become almost ‘abnormal’ in our modern world. In my view technology has been hindering us more than it is helping. The many social media platforms and dating apps we use these days has made love and romance even more complicated. These social networking sites have also created many new problems in long-term relationships and marriages, and I have witnessed it destroying many good relationships.
For example, too many of folks are curious about their ex-partners, because they now have more access to ‘stalking’ others. Some even want to reunite with their ex, who has married someone else in the meantime. Social media offers them an easy way to renew contact and often leads to trouble. Don’t get me wrong, technology is a great thing if used properly, but sometimes it can be also be too convenient and intrusive in other people’s lives.
A Different Approach To Calling On Archangel Michael
Many believers call upon Archangel Michael for spiritual guidance and protection. He is a wonderful protector, emanating a safe and soothing energy and presence.
Recently, he has shown me a technique to better work with him. I have taught it to several of my clients in need of emotional support and inner strength, and it has worked wonders! They have reported feeling lighter, stronger and clearer around issues that had felt blocked and stagnant for years.
The technique is essentially a simple shift in perspective and in our asking. When we are not seeing clearly what we truly need in our lives, it can help to simply ask the angels to help us see the issue differently, as well as how to ask for what we want in a more effective way.
Typically, when asking for clear guidance or protection, we would simply call upon Archangel Michael to ask him for whatever we need or desire. However, he recently revealed to me that we should rather ask to have those personal qualities activated within us that will empower us to manifest the things we need and desire for ourselves.
This approach leads to a personal transformation that increase our self-awareness and self-reliance, and hastens our spiritual growth. For example, instead of calling upon Archangel Michael every morning to be by your side and protect you throughout the day, you should rather ask him to activate the qualities of courage and inner strength within you.
This will create a ripple effect in your life, emanating from your core and altering the world around you. You will feel more empowered and daily life will be a little easier as you assert your newfound authority.