life lessons
Unconditional Love Is Heaven On Earth
When I was a little girl, I remember going to my grandparents’ home during the summers. I couldn’t wait for the summer to arrive, to get to spend time with them. It was always magical. The months leading up to those wonderful stays were always filled with anticipation and excitement.
Always having something to look forward to adds to the enjoyment and contentment of life. Whether it’s an upcoming event or something we are looking forward to, such trying an adventurous activity, or reading that new book you’re excited to dive into. Books have always been for me a bit of a mental vacation, because you can relax, while going places to imaginative places in your mind.
I believe the magic and enjoyment of getting to spend time with my grandparents came from it being filled with love and attention. Thinking back now, they were the only adults, when I was younger, who gave me their full attention and truly unconditional love. They were never too busy to sit and talk with me, or share stories from their childhood, which I found very fascinating.
Not all Grandparents are alike though. Some can be all about gossip, judgment, neglect, even abuse, and not the best role models. I was lucky that on my mother’s side of the family this was not the case. My maternal grandparents had all the traits and attributes one would imagine a truly loving grandparent to have.
I have memories of being in tears when having to leave and go back home. There I just spent my days alone in my room, as my parents were often too busy with church and other social groups they were involved in. I suspect all that time I was forced to spend on my own, helped me to expand and open my mind, to tap into those deeper areas of the psyche that are often left dormant.
Learn To Listen To Your Angels
Who is helping me? I have angels and spirit guides? Are they really helping me? If they are helping me, why is my life falling apart? These are some of the questions that come up in our lives, when we have been told that our angels and guides are always with us.
Yes, your angels are always with you, to guide you through life, to enhance your intuition, and to fill the voids that come into your life. However, they cannot intervene in your life. That is all up to you.
Sit in silence and truly listen, before making a decision. Breathe and ask them for their help in making the right decision. I have several clients who do this, and then follow their first gut reaction.
However, I also have several that start to question it and ask the same questions over and over, and over again. They put their heart into it, they put their thoughts into it, but the answer changes on them…because they have created the change.
Know that the very first gut answer that you receive, after sitting in silence, is going to be the right one for you. But when you create the answer you want yourself, things do not always work out well.
A good example has to do with life partners. Someone will make up their mind that they have to be with a particular person, but it’s not up to us to make that choice. It’s a mutual choice. There are two people to consider here.
The Importance Of Self-Trust
Of all the relationships in our life, none is more complicated or important than the one we have with self. And the cornerstone of this relationship is self-trust. Unfortunately, it is easy to damage the trust we place in ourselves. Why? Because all of us have or will make choices and decisions that don’t produce the desired outcome.
A relationship fails and we blame or question ourselves; a job opportunity eludes us; or a friendship fractures beyond repair. We lose self-trust when we don’t achieve a goal, whatever that goal may be. Then we may begin to question our own abilities, our dreams, and our worthiness to have them manifest in our life.
Every time we replay an event we label a failure the doubt in our own judgment and our self-worth increases. Self-confidence stems from self-trust, so the cycle can be a vicious one.
So, how can we repair self-trust? First, decide to give yourself a break. You made what you believed to be the best decision or choice in the moment. If you are saying, “No, I didn’t, I know I should have done…,” then stop and choose to forgive yourself for not trusting your instincts in that moment. Holding a grudge against yourself only assures that the pattern will repeat.
Next, decide to honor your emotions. If you have made choices and decisions that you perceive as a failure, then the tendency is to begin to substitute the opinions of others over our own intuition, desires and dreams. This pattern can lead to co-dependency, confusion and fear. Self-trust is harnessed when we follow our sacred wisdom, instead of looking outside ourselves to provide inner peace.
The Haunting That Still Haunts
Have you ever experienced something that was so scary you just couldn’t forget about it? No matter how many years have passed you still can’t get it out of your mind? I have had several such terrifying experiences in my life. Try as I might, I just simply can’t forget about those occurrences.
I can’t forget for example, about the time I experienced severe sleep paralysis. It was frightening beyond measure. I also can’t forget the feeling I got one time that I had to leave the place where I was living, and that I had to leave now. Later that week I discovered that the person I was sharing living space with, had been murdered. So, if your intuition tells to get out of an environment, listen to it!
Another experience that I will never forget had to do with a Ouija board. It was several decades ago. My friends and I were dabbling with one. We asked for a spirit entity to come through and we did make contact with someone… or something. It made the people I was with very scared, so they all left. But I continued to play with the board on my own, and when I asked what the spirit’s name was, and it spelled out the name Ralph.
I asked Ralph what he did in life and he said that he had owned a farm, which was on the land where I was living at the time. He also revealed that many animals had died on that land, because there had been a terrible plague and a shortage of medicine that could save them. After he lost his cattle, he built a home which ended up burning down to the ground. So, there had been a lot of suffering occurring on that piece of land.
I later did some research and found out that there had in fact been a farm on that property long ago. I also did a ritual to help the spirits of the farmer and his animals find peace. I blessed the land and burned lots of sage.
The Life Lesson Of ‘Making Plans’
‘Making plans’ has been a life lesson for me. Whenever I make serious plans, they always tend to fall through. Something usually comes up, or it just doesn’t work out.
It has been at times almost comical. I even started telling people, whenever they invite me to attend an event, or go somewhere with them, or sign up for something important, that I plan on possibly doing this with them, but I am not going to say it is definite….because then it probably won’t work out.
In time I came to realize that the Universe was teaching me, over and over again, to not make any major plans. The lesson for me has been simply to never say yes to anything with absolute certainty. Why? Because nothing is ever guaranteed. Things change, things happen… and not only to us, but also to others. It is often a domino effect that can impact our plans in many ways. Today, tomorrow, nothing is ever guaranteed.
In the process I have also learned to curb my emotions. You may find this odd or strange, but it has been my truth for more than four decades. In my experience, whenever I get super excited about something, it either gets taken away from me, or something happens to changes it for the worse.
Active Listening – A Message From My Guides
Your ears are working all day long. They hear thousands and thousands of sounds. Most sounds are routine, so many are dismissed as the normal cacophony of a busy life.
Without particularly focusing, you can easily differentiate between outdoor construction work, the squeal of tires on pavement, and the subtle dripping of a faucet indoors. You can also be awakened by an unusual sound while you are sound asleep.
With all this hearing going on 24/7, how often do you really make time to truly listen? Not just to miscellaneous, irrelevant sounds, or humdrum activity, but to the voices of loved ones and your own inner voice?
The key here is time. Everyone is so busy these days, that we are often thinking of something in the past, or planning hours, days or weeks in advance. Meanwhile, golden opportunities to learn more about each other can easily slip by.
People often hide their fears behind words of bravado or arrogance. When strangled by ego, they can overcompensate by sounding obnoxious or condescending. When they are feeling small or insignificant, people can try too hard to impress. Each of these attitudes can be annoying to the listener.
Ignoring The Signs In Matters Of The Heart
Many years ago, while consoling my best friend after a major breakup, it came to me that she was doing everything possible to continue holding on to what Spirit was removing from her life.
Sitting next to her, as she held on to her laptop hoping to find her lover’s name amidst emails, was like witnessing a tragedy. It was a heartbreak that most of us will experience at some point in our lives, either directly or indirectly.
After a year-long courtship, the ‘man of her dreams’ suddenly began to distance himself without any explanation. The calls became less, the frequent text messages disappeared, and there were no longer any plans on the calendar for their usual weekend outings.
I offered my friend a shoulder to cry on, and searched my mind for the appropriate, most comforting words to speak, but I could feel her gradually pulling away. All that mattered to her at that moment was establishing a deeper connection with her missing-in-action lover.
My friend resisted my recommendation to slow down, to find her center, and most of all… to let go. Instead, she suddenly bolted from her chair, threw on her coat and scarf, and fled the scene.
Several hours later, I received a frantic call from her. While parked outside of her boyfriend’s apartment, she saw him leave with his arm around another woman. Apparently, it was very clear from their mutual displays of affection, that he was in love with someone else.
Months went by, with my friend still holding on to the false hope that her love would someday return. Meanwhile, several very nice men attempted to get her attention, but she turned down each and every one. She even received a lucrative job offer, that came with a coveted geographical relocation, but she refused it. She turned her back on this amazing opportunity for fear of moving too far away from her ex.