life lessons
There Are No Clocks In The Spirit World
I attended a lecture at the Arthur Findlay College of Psychic Research in the United Kingdom many years ago, during which I recall the speaker saying, “There are no clocks and watches in the spirit world.”
He explained further that those of us who do psychic readings must bear in mind that as much as our spirit helpers do their best to give us some indication of time-frames, timing can actually be very tricky.
He also emphasized how we tend to get obsessed with time in our world. While we are constantly racing against the clock, our ‘inner states’ change over time. Sometimes, we may feel that we are beating the clock, and it feels empowering for a while, but there often comes moments when we wish we had more time to ‘just be’ and to feel connected to the very source of our being. To truly feel the state we are in.
When we are fully aware of the state we are in, for example the beginning of depression, we are able to process it and deal with it, instead of ‘chasing our tails’ until our mind and body eventually forces us to stop… and really feel the discomfort!
More importantly, when we return to the spirit world one day, our environment there will not be determined by time, but by the state we are in when we leave our current physical body.
The Importance Of Self-Trust
Of all the relationships in our life, none is more complicated or important than the one we have with ourselves. The cornerstone of this relationship is self-trust.
Unfortunately it is quite easy to damage the trust we place in ourselves. Why? Because during our lives all of us have, or will, make choices and decisions that don’t produce the desired outcome.
We all fail, and we all make mistakes. A relationship fails and we blame or question ourselves. A job opportunity eludes us, or a friendship fractures beyond repair.
We lose self-trust when we don’t achieve a goal, whatever that goal may be. Then we begin to question our abilities, our dreams and our worthiness to have them manifest in our life.
Every time we replay an event that we label a failure, the doubt in our judgment and our self-worth increases. Self-confidence stems from self-trust, so the cycle can become vicious and destructive.
So, how can we repair self-trust? First, decide to give yourself a break. You made what you believed to be the best decision or choice in the moment. If you are saying, “No, I didn’t! I knew I should have done it differently,” then stop the that negative thought pattern, and choose instead to forgive yourself for not trusting your instincts in that moment. Holding a grudge against yourself only assures that the pattern will repeat.
Next, decide to honor your emotions. If you have made choices and decisions that you perceive as a failure, then the tendency is to begin to substitute the opinions of others over our own intuition, desires and dreams. This pattern can lead to co-dependency, confusion and fear. Self-trust is harnessed when we follow our sacred wisdom, instead of looking outside ourselves to provide inner peace.
Embrace The Many Blessings Of Autumn
As we approach autumn and transition through yet another season of beauty and wonder, let us reflect on our place within this most magnificent Universe. This beautiful time of the year is sometimes overlooked for its lack of summer and winter adventure. As it is neither hot nor cold, autumn brings us balance and provides us with the perfect climate for ‘cooling off.’
Metaphysically, this a period for each of us to step back and become more introspective, acknowledging the blessings that have been placed at our feet. This is also a time to peel away the old, to make room for the new. It is a time of self-renewal at a deeper level, that will guide us through the winter of our lives and ultimately into the newness of spring.
Science teaches that the cycles of the seasons occur as a result of our planet tilting on its axis, as well as its orbit around the sun. As the axis faces the Sun, our respective hemisphere celebrates the warmth of summer, while the hemisphere tilting in the opposite direction, away from the Sun, welcomes winter. This seasonal change, in turn, makes our days shorter and our temperatures cooler.
We can further observe other changes within the natural world around us, as vegetation slows down, trees lose their leaves, and animals scurry to prepare their nests and dens for winter’s dearth. But autumn is also a season of vast abundance, with the harvesting of a plethora of crops, especially here in North America, where much of the world’s staples ripen and fall at our feet.
Love, Joy And Happiness After Years Of Hardship
I have a client who used to be extremely depressed. I recommend she speak to a therapist or counselor instead, because I felt that is exactly what she needed at the time. She had been harboring a lot of bitterness, grief, sadness, anger and other toxic negative emotions for a very long time. She needed professional help that I felt was beyond my scope of expertise.
So, she found a therapist and went for counseling, but months later she told me that the only thing she felt she accomplished was her spending thousands of dollars on help she never really received. She had still found no relief from her deep distress.
She had been bitter for a long time. While raising her children and attending church, her husband would cheat on her. She also worked the entire time the children were young, until they graduated. Meanwhile, he would leave on ‘business trips’ to go and gamble away their hard-earned livelihood, and spend time with other women. Then one day, he met someone he wanted to marry. So, they divorced and he moved far away to be with his new wife. He was a narcissist.
Her sadness and grief was also due to the loss of her mother, whom she had taken care of for 20 years after her father passed. She sacrificed a lot to dedicate herself to serving her mother’s needs. During this time she had no notion of self-care. She suffered on all levels: emotionally, physically, spiritually. She even gave up going to church. She was slowly dying inside and didn’t even know who she was anymore.
Extend Yourself The Grace Of Forgiveness
If you are an empath you may believe that forgiveness should be easy for you, or at least easier than it is for others. But I’ve spoken to many empaths and highly sensitive people over the years who all struggle with forgiveness.
One of the main issues with forgiveness for the empath is that we feel another’s emotions intensely, literally as our own. This muddies the waters considerably, because it tends to blur boundaries. Blurred boundaries can often lead to a closed mouth for an empath. Why? Because it is difficult for us, especially in childhood or in romantic relationships, to know where we end and another begins.
It is easy for others to manipulate appropriate boundaries with an empath, or to erase them altogether. All the empath knows is that there is pain, sadness, a sense of frustration, or anger. If you are an empath, then the question becomes are you angry with them, or yourself? Should you have been able to foresee the catastrophe happening, the relationship ending, job imploding, and so on. This leads to self-doubt and the rehashing of incidents that occurred years ago…with no resolution.
In the meantime, every time an empath thinks about the situation, past or present, we feel it…and the cycle continues.
Yes, you are empathic, intuitive, even psychic, but that does not make you immune to being human, neither does it make you all-knowing or all-seeing, especially when it comes to your own life, childhood or relationships.