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Birth Order And The Empath
Most of us are familiar with the notion that the personality traits of the firstborn are typically different from the middle sibling, or the youngest child in the family, and so on. But many empaths do not realize how they may be impacted by their birth order in the family.
In The Birth Order Book, author Kevin Lemar gives a detailed outline of these so-called ‘birth order’ characteristics and qualities.
Firstborns, as well as only children, for example, are often associated with leadership attributes and stronger personalities, along with being more protective, fearless, and reliable than their siblings. However, the firstborn may also exhibit some less desirable traits, such as being controlling, bossy and impatient.
The middle-born tend to be social butterflies and peacekeepers, who are focused on fairness and keeping everyone happy. The youngest-born tend to be fun-loving, outgoing, creative, free spirited and can be adept at manipulating others to do things for them.
Only children tend to be mature for their age, perfectionistic and conscientious, but may feel the burden of high parental expectations.
The Firstborn Empath
My experience with empaths has been that the firstborn and only child empaths are indeed more protective, fearless, independent, reliable, but in the empath these protective instincts are magnified tenfold.
They also tend to feel it is their responsibility to solve every human problem and protect everyone around them, regardless. I often see a very enhanced sense of responsibility.
Children Are Messengers Of Light
We have all been witness to a child’s laughter. There is just nothing else like it. Such complete innocence, joy and bliss! It must be the most wonderful thing one can hear.
A child’s laughter evokes a feeling of pure and complete connection with the Light. Why is that? I believe it is because children are so connected to God. It even says so in the Bible. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
Children are so free of ego and they can have authentic conversations, while so many adults have to struggle with being true to themselves. We struggle with letting our own light shine, but children are full of truth, kindness and mean no harm. The children of our world are messengers of love and light.
Sadly, we as adults sometimes get short with kids, because we feel what we are doing is so much more important than their simple pursuits. Instead we should maybe let go of the mouse, get off the computer and play with our kids. Try it and see how their love light shine so brightly, because of the attention and time you devote to them.
When I do readings for people and they are struggling in relationships and with self-esteem. I often ask them whether their mother and father talked to them. Did they read to them? Play with them? Many times our adult struggles go back to not being given that soothing touch at a young age or being ignored as a child.
So parents, let’s change the world one child at a time and give back for all the love, joy and hope that they bring us. It’s so simple. Just spend time with your child.
I used to baby sit for a child whose parents were so busy working all the time. Sadly, he would go from daycare to babysitter on rotation. I could see in his eyes the lack of love, but he would always greet me with a smile and a picture that I could tell he had worked diligently on. I would drop to my knees and hug him, and I could just feel him soaking it in like a plant that hadn’t been watered in a long, long time.
Honoring Our Fathers And Forefathers
In our youth we easily forget to honor those fathers and father-figures who love and guide us. As we grow older, and hopefully wiser, some of us begin to realize that our fathers are the unsung heroes we never appreciated much. If we are one of the lucky ones, they were our champions growing up.
Always stalwart and steady, no matter what was going on around them or preying on their minds. How often must they have ended their day wondering whether they were doing enough for their families and what the future might hold?
After the fact, sometimes they openly share the worries, fears and insecurities that became all too real in times of crisis, but these challenges were carefully hidden from us, so as not to frighten us.
For those of us who have fathers who fought in wars for our freedom, we owe a great debt of gratitude. These courageous men who may have been terrified in the face of grave danger, fought bravely for their beliefs and the safety of their families. Many were lost or injured. Most returned home, greatly changed. And yet, we rarely heard about the realities of war, or their sacrifices.
Striking a balance between strength and vulnerability is a never-ending work in progress. Blessed is the man who finds his equilibrium with a calm, cool demeanor in the midst of the chaos that surrounds them. Blessed also are the children who call him “Dad.”
To the men who have acted as leaders and mentors to many protégés, perhaps without even knowing it, a great deal is owed. Whether it has been through leadership in business, teaching in schools, or volunteering in communities, many have no idea how deeply they have affected those whose lives they have touched, even peripherally.
The Eternal Love Of A Mother
The nurturing energy of a mother is usually the emotional glue that keeps many families together. Whether it is their kindness, generosity, unconditional love or simply their joy and laughter, the mother-figures in our lives are often fundamental in helping us grow, expand, love and learn.
Many mothers must transcend what is possible to achieve the near impossible on an ongoing basis. Regardless of their circumstances, the impact of our mothers is deep and everlasting.
Perhaps it was your mother’s triumph over adversity that instilled a deep-rooted sense of perseverance in you. Perhaps it was by observing your grandmother’s social interactions that you learned how to function well in your community. There are many examples of how the mother-figures in our lives have nurtured and inspired us.
A mother’s unconditional love for her children is the most beautiful bond of love we may ever know. For this most of us should be eternally grateful. We are indeed privileged to have felt such loving care and protection.
For those of us who have lost our mothers, it is comforting to know that they continue to guide, guard and protect us in spirit, as we make our way through this life on Earth. Regardless of the turmoil we might endure, most of our mothers always come through with an amazing amount of love and care, both in this life and the next.
Our mothers can often also do more for us from the spirit realm, than they might have been able to do for us while they were here in this life. It is comforting to know that our mothers and grandmothers, including the mother-figures and nurturers in our extended family, are with us always, combining their earthly experience and newfound wisdom in spirit to impart to us even more than we could imagine while they were on the earth plane. Continue reading
Put Down The Phone And Start Living
I used to walk around the lake in the small town where I used to live. It was a picturesque hike that took you all the way around a large body of water that fed into the lake.
It was also a popular camping ground. Many city folks came to our little rural town to camp. Day after day, I saw them walking their dogs around the campsite, or relaxing on the park benches overlooking the water.
But nobody seemed to be appreciating much of the beauty of the natural surroundings. No, they were all too busy looking down at their phones!
In the good old days, people used to love breathing the fresh air, watching the children playing, looking for baby lizards on the sunbaked rocks, admiring a newlywed bride dancing on the beach, or marveling at the curious formations of the clouds above. These many beautiful nuances and subtleties in the world around us, are what make life joyful and precious.
Sadly, even seeing people walk their dogs saddens me these days. Everyone appears to be obsessed with their phones only. The dog owners hardly notice their own dogs, never mind anything else around them. They miss out on their dogs’ cute moments of joy and excitement.
Someday, when their dog is no longer around, they might regret missing these precious moments. So many lost opportunities and forfeited memories. Or maybe they will still just be staring at their phone.
Once, I saw a couple at the lake. They were also campers. They were lounging by the water, with their chairs far apart. Of course, this was of no concern to them, because they were both far too busy on their phones to even notice.
I’m sure they were posting pictures they took in front of the lake on social media. By the time they leave, they would have only those photos, but no real experiences or memories of ever being there. They were not at the lake, they were in cyberspace – the cell phone rabbit hole.
The Soul Future Of Past Relationships
To outward appearances, endings are a structural matter – now there is a relationship, now there is no relationship. From the soul point of view, ending is a different experience of the relationship.
Ending is not literal at all, but rather a radical shift in imagination. For example, a woman’s father passes on. In her soul the relationship may now intensify and may become the dominant myth shaping her other relationships, her career, and every other aspect of her life.
Memories of her father may now become more vivid than ever, and new feelings may surface. He may be more influential in her life now than when he was alive.
Another example might be a man who divorces his wife, thinking that now his thoughts will turn toward a new life. With the struggle of decision and separation now passed, feelings formerly nudged out of awareness now come to the forefront.
Completely unexpectedly, he now has dreams of her seducing him, suggesting that in some way ‘she’ now has renewed desired for him. Years later, he says what many people say: “I didn’t have to go through that divorce. If only I had known then what I know now…”
Apparently there is something in every relationship that is eternal, that goes on forever, and that wants to be exempted from the life-decision to cut ties. If you are experiencing this, it is not your imagination. You are simply being quite human.
Obviously, our relationships are not as simple or as limited in scope as we sometimes like to think them to be. There are only so many people we come to know in a lifetime, and an even smaller number with whom we live intimately. Continue reading
The Mysterious Man In The Back Yard
I remember coming out the back door, with a Kellogg’s Pop-Tart in one hand and a seven ounces bottle of 7Up in the other. It was July 13th. It was dad’s birthday and I had to be about nine years old at the time.
The family spent the day at my grandparents’ house to celebrate. More and more guests were showing up, until all the aunts, uncles and cousins were crowding together in the very small back yard.
I then noticed this mysterious man who I had never seen before. He was wearing a trench coat and he had a long beard. I remember thinking that he looked funny to me. I asked my mother who the man was, but when she turned around he was gone.
Later that night, I saw the same apparition again. It happened twice, and every time I saw him he was looking at me in a strange way. My grandparents became curious and asked me about this man I kept seeing. I described him and they seemed shocked.
My grandmother went to get a photo album and showed me an old picture. She asked me if that was the man I had seen and I immediately recognized him. My grandfather then told me that it was his uncle and that he died by falling off a cliff. Foul play was suspected, but nobody knew who might have pushed him or caused his accident.
Later that week, we took our bikes to cycle around a nearby hill. My older brother Mike was riding his bicycle down the hill and he suddenly hit a loose rock really hard. It blew out his front tire and was going very fast, but he was not seriously injured.