dating
Slow And Steady Is The Best Path To Lasting Love
In today’s superficial world of online dating, hookup apps and sexual promiscuity, it’s has become a daunting challenge to find a suitable partner who is genuinely ready for long-term commitment and relationship monogamy.
Also, in the dating scene, people typically wear masks, especially during the initial introduction. Everyone wants to give a good first impression and rarely want to discuss their truth, or past traumas. Dates also like to exaggerate or omit information, to make themselves sound more important or successful than they really are.
A few weeks into a new relationship is usually when the cracks start to show and the truth begins to float to the surface. For example, he comes from a good family and appears to be successful on paper, but he is emotionally fragile, or verbally abusive and narcissistic in relationships. Or, he claims he is totally single when you first meet him, but there’s actually someone else in his life and they’re not breaking that up anytime soon, because they have money invested together or are married.
We too often get so caught up in the fuzzy feeling and fantasy of a person possibly being ‘the one,’ that we forget to question if they are in alignment with what we truly need to add value to our life. Always listen to what a date is telling you, without sugar-coating it for yourself.
How To Manifest A Loving Partner
He loves me, he loves me not. Do you find yourself daydreaming about love? Imagining your next partner, what they will look like and when they are going to arrive in your life? Maybe you’re wondering if the person that you are interested in is also into you? Or perhaps you’re simply contemplating your current relationship?
Whatever your current relationship status, I am sure that thoughts of romantic love creep into your mind from time to time. So, given that we manifest not only with our actions, but even more so with our thoughts, take heed! Manifesting real, meaningful love isn’t as hard as you may think.
I believe that a loving, fulfilling relationship should be available to everyone, and not just a few lucky people. So, if you’re struggling, let me try and help you get to the bottom of the problem.
Since the same rules of manifesting apply in all situations, no matter what the desired subject or outcome is, I’ll give you the four simple steps I’ve used hundreds of times to manifest things into my life. And let me ease your mind: they don’t work just for me. These easy, yet powerful steps have worked for many of my clients.
First, you need to decide, and I mean clearly decide, what type of relationship you want. You need to have an inner dialog with yourself, and ask: does this work? Is this who I want and need?
Never Give Up Finding Your Perfect Partner
I once had a client who wanted a marriage more than anything else in the world. She has been single for many years and not getting any younger. She wanted a loving partner, and she never gave up thinking about the qualities she needed in that partner. She even told me she could feel him when she thought about it.
I have never met anyone so determined. She would find men to date on the internet, and asked married friends to arrange some blind dates for her. Even her adult son would introduce her to some of his friends’ divorced fathers! Of course, some of her dating experiences were very disappointing and she would tell me a variety of weird and wonderful stories about some of the men she had met.
In time she decided to keep a list of what didn’t work for her from each dating experience. She would edit her list after every new date. Even I was amazed at her courage and conviction. She simply told herself Mr. Right will come at the right time and never gave up on her dream.
She also encouraged her friends in a similar predicament to stay positive and have faith. A group of these women would even go to dinner a couple of times per month and discuss their dating experiences. They would talk about their recent dates and make their own list at the dinner table. They made it fun; they finding relationships a positive experience.
Reclaiming Your Power When A Relationship Ends
One of the main reasons it is so painful to release someone when a relationship ends, is because we have usually invested so much of our time and energy in our connection with that person. In essence, what we are truly missing when we mourn a relationship are parts of our self that we have given away. What we are mourning is the loss of our hopes and dreams, not merely the presence of the person who is no longer in our life.
If this is something you are currently struggling with, I recommend the following ritual designed to help you reclaim your power after a relationship break-up, so that you can restore your inner wholeness and resume your search for true and enduring love.
Supplies
- 3 votive candles: 1 blue, 1 green, 1 yellow
- 1 aqua marine or clear quartz crystal
- rain or sage incense wand
- small mirror
- 3 copper pennies
- 2 tbsp of fresh or dried mint in a small bowl
- 2 tbsp sea salt
When Your Man Is Not Ready To Commit
I often hear how wonderful the guy is that she is dating… if only he would commit to taking their relationship to the next level! If a woman is not satisfied with the way things are going and what she is getting from the relationship, should she continue to wait for him?
By patiently waiting for him against your better judgment, he only learns that he can get away with his lack of commitment, especially if he feels comfortable with what he is getting from the relationship. This way a pattern is formed.
So, how do you avoid wasting some of the best years of your life waiting on a guy that is never going to commit? well, right from the start you tell him what your looking for and what your expectations are. But handle it carefully, after all you don’t want to scare him away before things even get off the ground!
But do let him know how you feel about dating, long-term relationships, commitment, marriage, children, and whatever else may be important to you. This will inform him, so that you have a better shot at being on the same page. If he starts to make excuses, or says that he is not interested in a long-term commitment, at least not right now, then accept his words as the truth.
Your Soulmate is Not Someone Else’s Partner
Many people go through life looking for their soulmate or twin flame, while they may have already found them. To me a soulmate is simply someone you have a past life connection to and your souls cross paths again in this lifetime. It does not mean they are meant to be with you forever. It does not mean that you are meant to be lovers, partners or any other connection other than, you have been together in some capacity in a past life.
Sometimes clients who consult me about their love life are enamored with another person’s spouse or partner, and are so sure that this person is meant to be with them, instead of the person they are with. But the truth is, the Universe, Source, God, will never send you someone else’s partner to be your life mate.
I hear so often, “But I love him!” Or “We are so good together and she does not love her husband.” But these are merely empty words, or wishful thinking. Chances are you are only being used by that other person. They will tell you exactly what you want to hear. “Oh yes, my spouse and I have drifted apart.” Or, ‘My spouse treats me very badly.” Or the best one, “I’m only staying there until the kids are out of school.” These are simply lines to justify the pursuit of an affair.
True Love Comes Full Circle
When you feel a love connection with someone, why don’t things just automatically fall into place? Shouldn’t falling in love be easy and simple? For most, it is not, and the reasons vary.
A child only instinctively knows to fear falling and loud noises. Everything else is taught to us by our parents, culture, education system, media, and authority figures in our community. They are the ones that put values upon us, teaching us what is important, and what is not. Whether you agree with them or not, you absorb it, and more often than not mimic it. I often hear people say “I am nothing like my mother and father!” And yet, they emulate traits of their parents, especially the ones they dislike the most.
Love should be easy, but when it is not, perhaps it is because you have some work to do yourself. We co-create our relationships. If it is toxic, we each have a role. Difficult relationships are challenging and we all go through them – some more than others. I myself walked into an extremely toxic relationship thinking it was going to be an epic romance!