dating
Strategies For Manifesting A Successful Relationship
Over the years I have worked with many clients who either want to improve an existing relationship or manifest a new relationship. In these readings, spirit consistently suggests three simple spiritual practices that can radically change our relationships and romantic energy.
We tend to get stuck by over-analyzing and over-thinking our love lives, to the extent that we develop a lot of emotional charge and resistance in relationship matters. With the guidance of spirit, I have found these three simple strategies to be very helpful in moving our love energy in a more healthy and happy direction, in a very short time. Try these strategies in your daily spiritual practice. It could help you finally step into the love life of your dreams!
Dreamwork
Begin your relationship work in the dream state. Before going to bed each night, ask your angels, guides and higher self to invite your current love partner, new love interest or a future partner to join you for an ‘astral date.’ I like to think of it as ‘etheric couples counseling’ on the astral plane.
Meeting your lover in your dreams can ignite a significant energy shift in your relationship life, which will eventually translate into the emotional, mental and physical realms. In this altered state of consciousness the higher selves of you and your partner do the work with the support of spirit. The limitations, judgments and preconceptions of your ego or ‘lower self’ are all deactivated while you are asleep and in the dream state, and therefore unable to interrupt or interfere with the process.
Harmony In Your Relationship
How does one achieve true harmony in a relationship? This is probably the most elusive aspect in most relationships these days. Sadly, a happy and healthy relationship cannot be achieved without it also being a harmonious relationship!
To achieve harmony in any relationship, we need to address the following two aspects with honesty and courage.
Firstly, what do you require from the relationship? Are your needs being met, or is the relationship all about them? Too often people settle for a bad relationship instead seeking to fulfill their own wants and needs.
Remember, you matter. You must also be your priority, not just your partner. Your wants and needs are a priority. If you put your needs aside and put everyone before yourself, you will never find harmony or joy in your relationships.
Make a list of your top ten wants or needs. Then make a list of your top five deal-breakers. What will you not tolerate or settle for? Once you have clarity on what you need and expect, you can more easily figure out what to do about it.
A healthy relationship goes both ways, with comprise. Do your best to see that you stay true to your wants and needs. Too many people settle, because they either think they cannot find someone better, or they are scared to move forward on their own. But we must be brave to achieve what we desire in life.
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to find it. You deserve it! You are worth it! If you put all of that out to the Universe and believe it, it will happen for you when the time is right. Belief is key. If you believe it, you will achieve it.
The Soul Gold Of Dysfunctional Relationships
When I was younger, I actually searched for my birth certificate, just to see if I really was a member of my family! I’ve witnessed some close-knit and very loving families among my friends and acquaintances, which I admire and applaud. But not everyone is that fortunate. It seems some of us are thrown together in families we cannot help but wonder where we all fit in. For many of us our family and romantic relationships are complicated.
We typically grow up seeing perfect families on television and in the movies. We also observe them during summer vacations and winter holidays. But I have always preferred the exceptions to the rule, the alternative families, the dysfunctional, weird and wonderful family stories, because they portray real life with humor.
Growing up my family did the best they could with what they had and what they knew at the time. In our family there was much avoidance, secrets, Catholic school and the constant overhanging threat of being ‘sent to a nunnery.’ Role-models for how to build healthy, constructive I did not have. So, I had to figure it out on my own, making many mistakes along the way.
I have even attributed my sense of not belonging in my family to the planets: my Aquarius Sun sign and Sagittarius Rising sign. I assumed my tendency to be a bit of a star child, moving to the strange music in my own head, just needed its own space? Upon a closer look, as the years went by, my father and I had many similar traits, with some of my mother’s mixed in on the spectrum.
I was constantly searching for that next subject to study and different ways to escape through my imagination. I also closed down when people came too close and moved along as quickly as possible.
Tune Into The Guidance Of Your Emotions
I believe our emotions are an additional ‘sense’ we use as a means of interpreting our life experiences, in the same way the normal five senses enable us to perceive and understand the world around us. Our ‘emotional sense’ help us make decisions about our preferences all the time.
For example, I love chocolate. My sense of taste tells me that chocolate is for me! It’s a very clear and obvious signal from my taste buds to my brain. We receive and process stimuli all the time and our senses help us to ‘make sense’ of that input.
Your emotions are also giving you information about your preferences and if we listen and pay attention, we can gain a lot of guidance from it. Our emotions don’t just come from nowhere. They arise in direct response to stimuli or input, just like our senses do.
I have also heard emotions described as an internal guidance system, or our inner compass, which helps us decide what we want to create more of, and less of, in our life. We sometimes get confused though, because just like the other senses, we have different preferences.
For example, some people love coconut desserts, but I detest then. Not thanks, keep your coconut out of my chocolate! The thing is, I’m not confused about the fact that I don’t like coconut. I also don’t feel I have to change my preference because other people love coconut. And I also don’t force myself to eat it, just to make other people happy.
When one of our five physical senses tells us something we tend to listen, because it’s visceral. We feel it undeniably in the body. Emotions are no different!
When you are heartbroken, do you not feel it in your chest as a physical pain? When you are embarrassed, do your cheeks or ears not become flushed? Or how about when someone you love hugs you so warm and deliciously, all your muscles just ‘melt’ into that person? These are all physical responses the accompany our emotions.
We Don’t Find Love, It Finds Us
I simply started to believe in myself a little more every day, love myself, trust my intuition, recognize my goodness and that I am enough. That is how love found me. This is how I found my life partner, friend, lover and husband.
Over the years, I have seen the same with family, friends and clients. I see how love finds them. We don’t find love, it finds us.
For me finding that special person seemed elusive and impossible for a long time. We all have our stories of failed past relationships, love wounds and broken hearts. My mother would say, “The third time is the charm.” She was the eternal optimist, I thought.
Yes, there were interested, available guys, but not one I felt I could truly be myself with. Someone who shared my interests and would accept and love me for who I was.
It wasn’t until I decided to spread my wings and start pursuing my interests and the things close to my heart, that my situation changed for the better. It introduced me to many like-minded people who were in alignment with the things I loved.
Increasingly, an event, gathering, lecture, seminar, weekend retreat, charity fundraiser or social opportunity would pop up and find me, and I would always say yes! This way I met many wonderful and diverse people who shared my values and interests.
Interestingly, the wonderful man I eventually met and fell in love was not at any of those social events. He turned out to be a colleague from my place of work. You see, I could have met him anywhere in many ways, but not until I started to love myself and worked through my own insecurities. I first had to claim my own space in life and create the lifestyle I wanted.
In the process of learning to love myself more, celebrating my uniqueness, pursuing my interests and following the intuitive breadcrumbs on my spiritual path, I was allowing the light inside of me to shine brighter in an authentic way.
The Burning Love Of Twin Flames
Many of us hope to find a ‘soulmate,’ a person who was meant for us, but the Universe may have something else in store for some of us. A twin flame is someone who plays a different role in our lives than a soulmate, but has a similar, deep spiritual connection.
However, you may have a hard time finding a twin flame until you have encountered a soulmate. A soulmate highlights our individual soul purpose, while a twin flame helps us express our deeper karmic purpose.
A twin flame may or may not be a romantic connection. Even if they are not, you will always feel like you’ve known the person forever. You can easily talk with them about anything, especially if you shared one or more past life together.
A twin flame is a mirror to your deeper self, the authentic part of you. This person will challenge you, inspire you to engage in serious soul-searching, and ask the difficult questions.
It’s even possible you might intensely dislike them at times, but you’ll also find yourself drawn back to their aura. Having an open mind and spirit is key to not only meeting your twin flame, but also to successfully walking your path together.
Why do twin flames come into our lives? It’s all about timing. If you are stuck in a rut, not sure what your next step should be, often you’ll encounter one of these special soul connections. And you are just as important to their spiritual growth and soul evolution as they are to yours.
A twin flame meeting may seem coincidental or random, but it is definitely not. You are meant to learn and grow together on a spiritual, psychic level, and accomplish something together for the greater good.
This is the main difference between a soulmate and a twin flame. If you do meet your soulmate, it will be a personal connection, while a twin flame provides a universal bond.
The ‘Big Chill’ Moment Of A Soulmate Reunion
I started my first full-time job at age 17 working in the Conservation Corps. I grew up in a rural community and the local Conservation Corps was engaged in environmental stewardship, such as clearing debris and fallen trees from streams to prevent floods and fire hazards. As a teenager, I had many small jobs babysitting, gardening, and so on, but this was my first serious employment after graduating high school.
On my first day of work, I sat on a fence waiting for the bus that would drive us into the woods, when another bus full of ‘city kids’ arrived. The first guy that emerged from the city bus looked directly into my eyes and I remember having a million thoughts all at once!
His eyes were green, like mine. I believe that was a memory trigger. A memory trigger is a soul recognition clue that we program into the psyche before we come into this life. Its purpose is to remind us subconsciously of a soul contract. Soul contracts are agreements between ourselves and others to work out karma in this lifetime.
Mr. Memory Trigger Eyes looked down almost immediately once he saw me, bashfully, with a blushing face. Looking into his eyes felt like a lightning bolt hit my body. I felt a ‘big chill’ at the same time. The hair on my arms stood up. It was electric and exciting! There was an instant familiarity between us.
Although I had never met him before, I somehow felt I knew him. His face seemed familiar, which I ascribe to the built-in memory triggers. The ‘big chill’ is spirit stirring your psychic memory. I instantly knew I recognize his energy signature from past lives and the spirit realm. I even heard my higher self whisper, “He’s the one.” And he did turn out to be my first love in this lifetime.
During the three months we worked together, he flirted shyly with me, stared at me from afar. I knew we would eventually be in a relationship. There was never any doubt in my mind. I just knew it. But what was taking him so long?