mindful living
The Empowered Empath’s Guide To Spiritual Self-Care
Empaths, sensitives and intuitives tend to be givers. Loyal, sometimes to a fault, and fiercely protective of those they care about… moving at lightning speed whenever called upon.
So, when I say to an empath that it may be time to put themselves first, the response is often mixed.
But, if putting yourself first seems too selfish or too difficult, try something simpler: at least put yourself on an equal footing with those you love and care for.
For many sensitive and highly intuitive people, self-care must be an acquired behavior… and it’s a big one. Empaths intend to be selfless, to help, heal and facilitate those they care about. Wonderful!
But remember, if this is your goal, then begin with yourself. The stronger, healthier and happier you are then the more effective, nurturing and supportive you can be to those around you.
Putting yourself first doesn’t mean that you are doing only what you want to do all the time, and it doesn’t mean that you are suddenly going to ignore those you care about.
What it does mean is making it a priority to take care of your own physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. This can be a tall order and quite the task for some empaths. Don’t wait until you are in a meltdown… frustrated and snapping at everything and everyone around you, with little or no provocation.
Hold Your Tongue To Protect Your Peace
Some people deal with unresolved pain in their lives, and that pain often shows up in their words. You can usually feel it right away. Their words can feel heavy, sharp, or draining, like they disrupt the energetic balance of a space.
In spiritual work, one of the first lessons one learns is that words carry vibration.
If you’re the kind of person who’s intuitive, empathic or highly sensitive, this kind of exposure can feel especially overwhelming, leaving you emotionally upset or energetically drained. This reaction isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s just your inner guidance that tells you when something’s off.
It’s important to be discerning on a spiritual path. You don’t have to respond to every person or comment. Not every interaction needs a response.
When someone’s speaking from a place of anger, fear, or unresolved issues, you’re totally allowed to take a step back and choose not to engage with it. Silence isn’t avoidance. It’s all about being mindful of your energy use and being spiritually mature.
Take a breath before you react. Bring your awareness into your body and ground yourself in the present moment. Try to respond with clarity instead of emotion. Meditation, prayer, or just taking some time for yourself can help you get in sync with your higher self instead of getting caught up in reactive patterns.
Making Space For New Blessings To Arrive
At the beginning of a new year many people feel pressured to set big new goals, make major decisions, and “get it right” immediately.
But for the spiritually aware person, the real work of new beginnings starts somewhere simpler and quieter. It starts with clearing. It means releasing what no longer serve you, so there’s room for what’s next.
Over time, we all accumulate energy that is no longer ours to keep: old emotions, outdated beliefs, and stale patterns that once were protective but now just feel heavy.
If these things are not acknowledged and addressed, they tend to follow us into the every next chapter. That’s why the start of a new year can be a powerful time to pause and intentionally create space.
One simple place to begin is your physical environment. Just opening the windows can already shift the energy in a noticeable way.
Fresh air helps move stagnant mindset and stale energy out and brings in a sense of renewal. As you do this, take a moment to set an intention to release what feels old and invite in clarity, ease, and support.
Some people also choose to cleanse their space with sage or palo santo. This doesn’t need to be elaborate or ritualized. Slowly move through your space, paying attention to areas that feel heavy or overused, such as corners, entryways, and especially places where you often sit with your thoughts. As the smoke moves, silently name what you’re ready to let go of and the kind of energy you want to keep.
You Are A Human Being, Not A Human Doing!
We are living in a fast-paced world where we feel we must do many things every day, hardly having much time to just be. To just stop. To think. To just be.
Instead of embracing the fact that we are a human beings, we are in this day and age more focused on being humans doing.
We get caught in up in the web of life, with its chaos and drama. And we get frustrated and feel so rushed. There is no time to truly do the things we want to do; to spend time doing the things that matter the most.
Today, take a moment to just sit for a few minutes and simply do nothing.
Meditate. Just think about nothing and if thoughts come in, ask yourself: is this thought helping me to get in alignment with my true self? Am I in touch with the higher self that allows happiness to be a part of my space and life?
If the thoughts that are coming in are not happy or healthy, or not helping you to be spiritually aware and give you that feeling of being fulfilled, then you just allow them to go in and out. Just let it be.
No need to over think, or evaluate, or spend energy on it. Just let it go. If a thought comes in and it’s a stressor for you, note it and remember to maybe get rid of that thought or person from your life.
Take Out The Toxic Trash With A Self-Love Meditation
I’ve been teaching meditation for over 30 years now, and it is something that has been widely misunderstood. It has also been hijacked by people with nefarious, materialistic agendas.
Meditation is not about emptying the mind or having no thoughts. Rather, it is about removing and replacing negative thoughts, repetitive patterns, abusive programming from childhood, and conditioning imposed by sadistic or wounded individuals.
Meditation is about inviting God, Spirit, Source, the Divine back into the heart, soul, and mind.
When we are children, everything begins with love. Children are eternal optimists, even when they have been traumatized.
But almost every child encounters at least one parent, relative, teacher, classmate, or authority figure who is abusive. These individuals attempt to rid themselves of their own overflowing toxicity by dumping it onto others: verbally, emotionally, or physically. Their words become programming, much like a computer virus.
Meditation is designed to replace that negative programming. Instead of hearing “you are worthless” looping in your mind, meditation allows you to consciously replace that tape with “I am loved.”
Think about the hurtful words that were spoken or screamed at you as a child. Then, during meditation, repeat the opposite.
The True Meaning Of Spiritual Surrender
When life becomes too challenging, and things begin to fall apart for us, we usually seek spiritual guidance and comfort.
In these circumstances we often tend to hear terms like surrender, release and acceptance. We are told to just let it go and simply be in the moment.
But what does it really mean to surrender? It’s a term often used in spiritual and metaphysical circles. Is there even such a thing? And if so, what does it entail?
According to the dictionary, surrender means to stop fighting and admit defeat. It also conjures up the vision of waving a white flag. But is spiritual surrender truly nothing more than throwing in the towel, and graciously accepting our defeat?
I prefer to explore the meaning of spiritual ‘surrender’ through the metaphor of a painting I made, which is my way of meditating and reflecting on life.
The painting is of an angel and I even named it Surrender. I chose this name, because it is the energy this angel emanates. His pose and posture also symbolizes the act of surrender.
At the time of working with the energy of this piece, I was in the process of leaving the security of a mainstream finance career, to establish myself as a full-time artist, energy healer and spiritual reader. Meanwhile, I was also very busy navigating a family separation and divorce. There were so many major changes in my life, and so much about my future and my life path that remained uncertain and unknown.
Staying Calm Is Often The Key To Inner Peace
Sometimes the emotional charge of something as simple as a misunderstood comment, or a statement taken out of context, can throw even the most level-headed person into a tailspin.
Developing a general demeanor of good humor can assist you in dealing with some of these most difficult, embarrassing or awkward situations encountered in life.
Everyone handles things differently, doing the best they can with the information they have at the time.
Although, generally, the goal is to come to a better understanding and reach common ground, sometimes this takes much more time, effort and compromise than expected.
Although it is important to resolve an issue and clear the air, if possible, it is equally important to put each issue into context. Years from the date of the affront, will the issue be remembered at all and, if so, will it have anywhere near the importance that it did at the time?
Certain issues will never be forgotten, however, they can often be forgiven for the sake of all parties involved.
Long after the dust has settled, though, some people are inclined to continue to ruminate and replay negative scenarios over and over again.
This only serves to feed the flames of injustice and keeps the anger front of mind, long after the offending party has moved on physically and/or emotionally. As a result, rehashing the past can seem to perpetuate an aura of general negativity in your life.