life design
Choose Kindness – A Message From My Guides
In these times of uncertainty, worry and fear, we urge you to step back and let kindness prevail. It is more important than ever to take a breath before reacting to what might normally seem to be an insensitive comment, or blatant oversight.
Even people who are usually even-tempered and relaxed can currently be on edge after months of sheltering in place, and it is impossible to understand what every individual may be going through right now, or how difficult their circumstances might be day-to-day. This does not condone their negative behavior, but it does give you an opportunity to rise above the fray, before responding in kind.
Keep in mind that, although everyone is currently in the same boat, each situation is entirely different. One person might have very limited finances, and truly worry about putting food on the table. Another might be a single parent, with children to home school, in spite of having to leave their home every day to also work as a first responder or an essential service worker. No two sets of circumstances are alike, and to each individual their personal challenges will be of paramount importance.
Listen before reacting. Pause. Try to empathize with the other person’s point-of-view, instead of the way it is being presented. Try to see past a short-tempered response, or erratic explanation. A smile and a patient ear will often diffuse a tense situation.
The good news is that the circumstances in your world are gradually improving, and there are many positive occurrences on the horizon. The Sun continues to rise every day, while thousands of scientists and medical experts are working around the world to bring about vaccines and treatments to fight this latest suffering. Millions more have ramped up their service in offering medical, emotional and financial support to those in need. Each day, there is another glimmer of hope in many different parts of the world.
Get Rid Of The ‘Moldy Blueberries’ In Your Life
Positive energy spreads, and is infectious. Think about the positive, optimistic people in your life and how, whenever they walk into a room with their laughter, smiles and humor, they just raise the vibration of the entire room. Of course, excluding the really negative people in the room, who choose to remain impervious.
Yes, positive energy is contagious, but so too is negative energy. Just like the mildew on one bad blueberry, kept in a container with other blueberries, it spreads mildew and rot to all the other blueberries around it.
I remember walking into my dance studio one day, many years ago, and finding most of the moms, who had kids in my class, in the waiting room. I took this opportunity to show them the children’s costumes for our upcoming dance recital. The moms were instantly in love with the outfits. Some even became sentimental and teary-eyed. They commented excitedly on all of the bright sequins, the colors and styles. They all talked enthusiastically about how much they loved it, and how truly beautiful these designs were.
Then one mom arrived late, while I was in the office. I could not be seen by the group of mothers, but I could hear them. The late-arriving mom noticed the costumes and immediately began to complain about every aspect of it. She was very critical and felt they were “cheap-looking.” She even claimed that the moms had all been “ripped off” and that I over charged them.
Simple Self-Care To Improve Your Well-Being
We are living in stressful times, but this can also be a time of reflection, and looking into the future, making plans. If you are currently feeling depressed, or in despair, there are many simple things you can do to ease your mind, or lift your spirits.
To begin, take some time to reflect on how you are feeling. Often we are unaware of how things are really affecting us. Consider how you may be choosing to perceive things, and whether you need to take some time to truly process some of your thoughts and feelings. Just recognizing that you are sad, afraid, frustrated, or depressed, is already a step in the right direction.
Remind yourself also that some of your thoughts and feelings may not be unusual in these unusual circumstances. Many people are going through the same thing at the moment. You are definitely not alone.
Each of us react differently to unpleasant life events. Try to stay positive and not be so down on yourself. Try to be more proactive and take time to reflect on what is most important in your life. Meditation, and other forms of spiritual practice, is a great way to relieve stress in your life.
Now Is The Time To Invest In Yourself
Throughout our childhood, we receive advice from family and teachers on how we should succeed in life. Study hard. Get good grades. Go to college for a quality career. Get married and have a family. Buy the dream home. Financial success and prosperity. Provide for your family. Send your kids to college. Become proud grandparents.
In reality, our real life experiences can throw us major curve balls, and impact what we envision as our dream future. In the same vein, life experiences create magnificent opportunities. Well-meaning guidance and suggestions from family and friends is beneficial. It is to be part of our consideration. It can give us goals, and affirm what we know about ourselves.
Careers can include being of service. A social worker, doctor, nurse, lawyer, first-responder, accountant, veterinarian, military, waitperson. A career in science. A researcher, chemist, biologist, architect, engineering. A career in entertainment. An artist, musician, dancer, playwright, author, actor, composer.
The career you choose is, however, to be one that nurture’s your heart as a priority. It should give you a feeling of passion and purpose, rather than financial security. Financial security is a goal one needs to have a degree of focus upon. We do need money to pay our bills, to support our family and lifestyle, to finance our dreams. Money being ‘the root of all evil’ is a fallacy. Money is a form of energy exchange. It has no judgment. It can influence or impede financial security. It is what you do with it that matters. But financial security is often temporary and based on your decisions and emotions.
Enter into your career choice with enthusiasm, passion, and a zest for knowledge. It may turn out that your career changes as you grow older. Jobs will definitely change through the years. You may be an individual who says, “Money does not matter or drive me.” This is a learned, mental paradigm picked up from your upbringing and childhood environment. Change it. Start thinking of how you can use financial security to benefit others.
The Rosary Reflections Of A Spiritualist
Some of us are merely going through the motions every day, doing what we think others expect of us, doing the ‘should’ we put on ourselves. Living life by rote. I equate this to saying prayer beads. It becomes almost an unconscious act. So, when something unexpected happens, like the coronavirus pandemic, and we are forced to slow down, or even come to a complete halt, we are suddenly confronted with our own truths.
For some of us, the only things that then come to mind are all the things that we perceive we have done ‘wrong’ in the past. We feel guilt over all the people we have disappointed or hurt. We mourn the relationships that did not go the distance. We obsess over the skeletons in our own personal closet.
When we get into this mindset of shame and regret, it affects our immune system and our well-being. The ‘poor me, bad me, angry me’ turns into a very ‘toxic me.’ When the world seems to be falling apart, the mind does a life review. We let the fear and regret creep in. What if there really is an afterlife, even if you have always said, “I don’t believe in heaven and hell.” The ‘what if’s’ in life can really do a number on us. When faced with uncertain times it is only natural to think about our own mortality, and our failures and past mistakes.
One thing I find that really helps, is to reflect on the good memories. Let the unpleasant ones come and go, and not reside in your mind. Thoughts are such powerful things, especially when you are still reflecting on things at 3am in the morning, while you should be sleeping. These worries and bad memories are usually things we can’t do anything about, even if we desperately want to.
When things seem out of control, flip the switch. Reflect instead on all the things you have accomplished. Think about things in your life that have brought you great joy. Times that even one person said good job. People that have said “I hear you,” and “you matter to me.”