inner guidance
Free Yourself From An Unhealthy Relationship
An intimate relationship or marriage is meant to be a safe space. Your partner or spouse is supposed to be the closest person in your life. They should be the one person you are able to trust unconditionally with the most important aspects of your life.
If you are currently in a challenging relationship, you need to ask yourself if this union has all the key traits for a healthy, happy relationship. Do you feel secure, safe, and supported? More importantly, do you feel loved and valued?
If not, are you hoping it will somehow work eventually, and develop into something that will offer you more of what you need and deserve?
These are vital questions to ask yourself, not only before you commit to someone, but also throughout the relationship. All relationships evolve over time as people change and grow.
Just because everything was great during the initial ‘honeymoon’ phase of a relationship, does not guarantee it will remain that way. A healthy relationship continues to grow and evolve, as both partners grown and evolve.
I have worked with many clients over the years who settled for less, or got caught up in the downward spiral of a dysfunctional, toxic relationship. Saying “I love you” does not mean much if it is not backed up by matching actions and behavior.
Transform Your Life One Step At A Time
Knowing when to make that much needed change in your life can be daunting and very confusing. We often feel this need for change when we already have a lot going on. We tend to also overthink things and then feel overwhelmed, or even paralyzed with anxiety or fear.
Once you get into this kind of ‘stuck’ pattern, nothing seems to get done or resolved. No choices or decisions are made. In turn, this causes even more unhappiness, distress, and turmoil in your life. We all have a tendency to get in our own way.
Over the years of working with many clients in this situation, spirit has always made one thing very clear: it always starts with a firm choice or decision. You don’t have to act on it immediately, but it instantly begins to shift your energy in a new direction, or towards a long-term solution.
Indecision, fear, or lack of commitment to a clear vision for the future is first and foremost what keeps many people stuck indefinitely in the stagnant energy loop of an unhappy, unfulfilled life.
Once you have made up your mind about what you intend to achieve or which direction you wish to go, you gain more clarity and become calmer and more grounded to start taking baby steps forward. Then you can begin to resolve the situation one step at a time with spirit’s support.
To get started consider a simple, step-by-step approach to make break the process down into smaller steps that will be less overwhelming and more attainable.
Healing A Broken Heart
One of the hardest things that we will ever have to do is recover from a broken heart after a relationship break-up. We don’t want to be without the person we love; it hurts to say their name, or to think about them. And sometimes it is hard to even breathe.
When a relationship fails we need to grieve and heal. This is a time to be around people who care about us. The worst thing that we can do is to harden our hearts and build a wall that no one can touch. All that this will do is stop us from growing and learning more about ourselves – to know who we are and learning how to love ourselves again.
We are not to give up on future relationships, because that will not serve us in the long run. We need to be able to feel again, but it takes time. Everyone has to go through their own grieving process because no one really knows just how much you are really hurting. With time you will get there.
So many times we think that the love that we have found is real and everlasting, but true love does not lie, or cheat, or make you feel unwanted. True love makes us feel secure, not insecure.
Sure, we have to work at a good relationship, but when it becomes too much of a tug-and-pull, we have to listen to our gut feelings. Trust your inner guidance and hear what spirit is trying to tell you.
I do not think anything hurts more than being disappointed by the person that you thought would never hurt you. When you are ready to start again, make the decision that you are going to move on, that its time.
Happiness Is To Follow Your Path With Joy
Discouragement, failure, heartache. Poor Moses did not have it easy. He went daily to the throne of the Pharaoh to ask for the release of his people. His life hadn’t started out very well. His mother had to hide him in the bulrushes, so he wouldn’t be killed right after his birth.
Then he went to live in the princess’s house, and knowing he was different he often felt alone. Adopted by royalty, his biological mother and sister were still living as slaves in the fields. He wasn’t happy. He should have been in high spirits, because he had everything a young man could desire…except he knew he didn’t belong.
Then, before he realized what had happened, this young man had killed an Egyptian soldier! So, here he was, a sought criminal, running away and going into hiding.
He had a stutter when he spoke, so he was a quiet man. But then Great Spirit puts him on his true path, instructing him to “go talk to Pharaoh, tell him to let my people go.”
What! Look, this path can’t be right? Yet, reassured by the prophets, the messengers, he embraced his task of getting the Israelites out of Egypt. With his brother by his side to do the talking, Moses finally went to the Pharaoh, and kickstarted the dream of freedom from slavery.
God helped Moses by creating problems for the Egyptians. He sent plagues and calamities. At first the results were disappointing and there was no change. Time after time, ten times in fact, just as the release seemed to be granted, the Pharaoh snatched it back again. But eventually see the plan finally work out.
Reflections
Sitting on the porch. Rocking. Yes, rocking in my willow rocking chair, surrounded by the smell of petrichor – that delightful odor the earth gifts us with when fresh rain is coming down after a long, dry spell. The aroma of the freshly hung chile ristras greets me in the Santa Fe, New Mexico tradition at this time of year, when the growing season is done and the picking of the season’s ripe offerings has begun. Richness abounds with the aromas of the petrichor and the strung pods of red chile blending in the softness of the evening breeze.
The automatic flood light and the blue laser lights have come on, as they do every day at dusk, to illuminate the waterfall in the garden, although it’s still a bit early for them to shine their brightest. Not quite dark enough yet, but soon it will be. I just fed my precious four-legged fur daughter her dinner. Now that my day is done and another week has gone by, I am contemplating whether or not I have done well this week.
Yes, I believe so! I have learned so much and have grasped many new concepts. I also renewed my awareness of some familiar concepts that were in need of repetition, so I could complete some hard earned lessons. And I found resolution to some newer viewpoints on old issues. Whew! I feel I’ve been turned wrong side out in just one week, only to realize it is the other way around. I was wrong-side-out before. Now I’m right-side-in, or more so at least.
I look up from my musings to see the lights. It is dark now and they’re shining brightly against the dark night sky. The lasers look like blue fireflies as they pinpoint their magical presence. The synchronicity feels deeply significant. At the end of another week, after much breaking down of old thought patterns, I see the flood light and laser lights reflecting the realization that I am different now than last week, or at any time before.
Let Spirituality Be Your Guiding Light
In a fast-paced world where superficial, materialistic pursuits tend to dominate our lives, the search for deeper meaning and purpose has become even more significant for many people. Spirituality has always been a guiding light in this quest.
Spirituality offers solace, clarity, and a profound connection to something greater than ourselves. It is inherently personal and subjective, and not limited to religious affiliations, formal belief systems, or cultural traditions.
To be spiritual is to have a deep awareness of the higher self, as well as a heightened connection to God, Goddess, Source, Spirit, the Divine, the Universe.
Our preferred spiritual practice does not have to be some form of dogmatic religion, which tends to involve organized rituals, ceremony, and fixed doctrines. Instead, it can also be an individual exploration of higher consciousness that seeks a direct and personal experience of the sacred and divine.
Spiritual awareness is also not confined to merely a few isolated moments of contemplation, but instead a holistic, consistent state of mind, or way of being in the world, that permeates every aspect of our life.
By integrating spiritual principles and practices into our daily life, we infuse our everyday choices and actions with intention and authenticity, leading to a more balanced, fulfilling, and purposeful existence.