self-worth
Seeing Yourself As You Truly Are
The art of ‘being seen’ begins within. It is not in the eyes, or heart, of an external beholder. It is the grace of being able to see oneself through the Divine Eyes of our Creator.
Every soul is unique. No two are the same. Each soul emanates from the Supreme Loving Source to offer its unique beauty and pleasure to God in an incomparable, individual way. When we look at ourselves through this lens, the true beauty, light, and power of the spiritual spark of our being shines upon our inner vision.
Relationships offer mirrors too. But what they show vary according to the quality of the reflecting surface. And what we see in them depends upon how well we know, see, and stand in the truth of our own higher self.
For example, if I look at myself in a broken mirror, do I see a crack in my face? I might…if I am not sure of who I am. However, if I know myself to be whole, I can readily recognize that the crack is in the mirror, and not in my face.
Similarly, there are relationships in life that reflect broken images back to us. That does not mean that we are broken, nor that the other person or people involved are broken either. We all have wounds and scars and other gaping holes yet to be healed, or not.
Whatever the case may be, it is the relationship itself that offers up the reflective element. It is the dynamic of exchange that shows itself as either clean, clear, balanced, cracked, smeared, skewed, and so on.
Knowing oneself in truth and wholeness is thus extremely valuable. If we do not possess such certainty of self, we may accept a broken or distorted impression projected by an ill-functioning relationship to be a reflection upon ourselves.
You Are A Bright Star In A Benevolent Universe
We live on a vibrant planet, a microcosm of a vast universe of mysterious galaxies, infinite passages, magnificent star clusters, and more than a zillion types of light we can only touch in the stillness of our souls. I am reminded of this splendor each time I gaze into the night sky.
I am also reminded of our presence in this wondrous universe upon waking in the morning and witnessing the magnificence of the sun rising above the hills. And then there is that pre-dawn twilight period when a sacred stillness envelopes all.
It is at these times that I feel most connected to the Divine Essence of Life that flows through the entire Universe. It affirms that I am also a part of this vast and expanding wonder of abundance, benevolence and unconditional love.
We sometimes lose sight of the fact that we have been created complete and dynamic, with an endless array of spiritual, metaphysical and psychological powers to forge through any goals we might establish for ourselves.
Too often we see ourselves as lacking in the ability to move our lives forward, especially when everything seems to be going wrong. It is during these periods that we must take a step back, breathe deeply, and focus on how magnificently perfect we were created.
Each of us is born with an inner compass and a set of spiritual gifts to guide our lives to celestial heights, even in the most rough moments when it appears that our world is crumbling.
I once had a wise friend who was a revered elder in our community. Throughout her life she has freely shared her wisdom with me. Towards the end of her earthly life, she reminded me that we were each born with the perfect tools in place to navigate through any ordeal, both the positive and the seemingly negative.
She urged me to reflect upon the higher guidance we were born with, and not be afraid of trusting my inner voice, especially during the bleak periods. So, in honor of my dear old friend, I encourage you today to utilize your special set of spiritual tools and trust in the higher guidance it leads you towards.
Unlock The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind
We are problem-solving beings, which is why we have thrived on this planet for so long. Where do the ideas for solutions come from?
Well, our conscious mind can come up with a lot of simple solutions to everyday problems. However, when it comes to more significant issues, it is our subconscious that saves the day.
As incredible as it may seem, experts claim that only 10% of our mind power can be attributed to the conscious mind, whilst a whopping 90% can be credited to the subconscious!
The subconscious mind is a mysterious, powerful phenomenon. I call it the ‘genie within.’ It is our gateway to universal intelligence and infinite wisdom. It is our pathway to higher consciousness. It is also a powerful aspect of our ability to create and manifest through the Universal Law of Attraction.
For example, when my son was small, my husband and I bought a beautiful yellow car. The car was indeed a pleasure to drive. However, my husband used to tease me and say things like, “You have a posh car – I wish I had a car like that! He would say it time and time again, but with no malice intended.
The problem was not so much what said, but rather how my subconscious interpreted his words. Inside I felt unworthy of such a car and guilty for having one far better than my spouse.
Unfortunately, within less than a year of owning my beautiful new vehicle, it was hit by a massive truck and smashed to smithereens. No longer did I have a ‘posh car.’ While I felt terribly sad about this and incredibly out of pocket at the same time, I did feel more at peace.
Work Through The Fear, Obligation And Guilt (FOG)
Reflecting on my life I have found how many of my early life experiences have subconsciously influenced me, mostly due to a lack of awareness that allowed fear, a sense of obligation and guilt to remain hidden.
These hidden influences mostly come from my formative years and became obstacles I had to repeatedly struggle with in my adult life with regards relationships, career, finances, family and community.
Once I discovered these non-empowering beliefs, it was time for me to get out of the FOG (Fear, Obligation, Guilt). In hindsight, several things I was unaware of in my family’s dynamics, were actually ‘seeds’ hidden beneath the surface that in time sprouted into personal challenges and self-sabotage.
Fear
Fear and insecurity are frequent visitors for many of us in all areas of life. I was constantly focused on the negative and worst-case scenarios. This is because our brain is wired this way for the purpose of survival. Much of it also depends on our upbringing. So, we must recognize this and catch ourselves early on, in order to shift our thoughts and emotions in a positive direction.
We must be cognitive of our behaviors and explore where in our life we have learned these negative, fear-based responses. Fear is a natural part of life, but can easily become a ‘whack-a-mole’ of frustration, anxiety, uncertainty and indecision, always showing up at the most inconvenient times.
Still Hanging On To The Wrong Person?
Are you still hanging on to the wrong person? I know you adore him. I know you love her. I understand that you believe you are soulmates and ‘meant to be.’
But be aware that your beloved has free will. If they are not exactly alignment with you, no matter how you strongly feel about them, nothing will come of your ‘situationship.’ They are on their own journey and you cannot will someone to be your lover or life partner. It is nothing more than the beginning of a colossal heartbreak.
I have witnessed many love-struck people hang on for years to someone that has either left them for good, or kept stringing them along. Some of them have even married and had children with someone else, and yet, they still hang on. They often fervently believe their love interest will someday return to them and then they will live happily ever after. Well, the truth of the matter is that they will not. The other person has made their choice and walked away for a reason.
This new year, with all that has been going on in the world, it may be time to take a few deep breaths and have a self-reflective moment. Take a good, hard look at your life choices and your relationships.
If you are making unwise, self-sabotaging choices, consider what it may be that is not feeding your soul? What is it that is really missing in your life? Maybe it is time to release what no longer serves you. Simply let it go. Find your inner peace, and just be happy and content with yourself and who you truly are.
As a psychic advisor, I encounter the good, the bad and the ugly. I have seen much trauma and damage done, sometimes almost irreparable, to people in toxic relationships and love obsessions. Marriages of several years simply falling apart or ‘trusted’ partner walking out with zero notice. I have watched many go through failed relationship after failed relationship, always with the same results. The result is always the same: excruciating heartbreak.
When the victims of these bad relationship choices are encouraged to do some soul-searching, to see what it is inside of them that is compelling them to go back to the same type of person, time and time again, they are offended and become angry.
We Are All Somebody’s Somebody
This is a story about a child who grew up thinking one way, but in time discovered that things are not always as they seem. How we choose to think, or see, or feel about life is how we will live it.
His journey started in the fall of 1961. At birth he appeared to be perfectly ‘normal,’ except that he was underweight and arrived a little early. It was later to be discovered that he had sight in only one eye and did not respond to sound in his left ear. This caused him to also experience difficulties later in learning how to talk. He also had some health issues with the functioning of his heart.
He was fortunate to grow up with a loving family, who understood early on that he was different, but for the most part they didn’t treat him any differently. With the help of speech therapy, hearing aids and glasses, he learned to manage and adapt, but there was a burning anger and frustration inside of him as he grew older.
In time, he increasingly realized how different he was to the other kids, to the extent that it made going to school and interacting with others very frustrating.
Then something wonderful happened. His father, who had been an Eagle scout in his youth, also got him involved with scouting. Suddenly, his world opened up. Although as a family they often went camping and taking canoe trips, this was different, because he was spending time with other boys his age.
Soon, he became involved as a manager of the football team, and later as an athletic trainer. He had found his role and calling, figuring he can’t play himself, but he can certainly help others play! He had finally found something he was really good at, and by the time he was a senior in high school his reputation was such that he was recruited to be a student trainer for All-state Boys Basketball.
Later he attended college on a scholarship as a student trainer and participated in several championship teams, including as the head student trainer for the co-ed training room. College, however, not only afforded him his dream career, but it also offered him the opportunity to help those kids who weren’t playing on the A-teams. He could teach them how to participate in their own way, and still succeed. After graduating he became a certified athletic trainer.
Embracing The Shadow
When I first began to intentionally and consciously walk a spiritual path, I remember doing so because it just felt so right. Every step I took toward ‘enlightenment’ in this lifetime seemed to bring more brightness into my life, and so many more blessings.
In those early days I was really rolling! I was expecting this to be an easy ride – all joy and light and love. It was wonderful.
What I hadn’t expected was the inevitable emergence of my shadow through as a result of all my spiritual work. And it was not something I was going to be comfortable with – admitting I had places of darkness within me, unloved aspects of myself, disowned pieces of my soul which had been abandoned and in such pain.
Through a series of, what seemed like, unfortunate events, I was given opportunities to face my shadow side. Challenges in relationships with friends and loved ones arose. I couldn’t understand it at first, and felt very alone and misunderstood. I was shifting the blame for this onto the people around me, instead of going inward.
Going inward, into the light, was totally okay, but going inward into the darkness was terrifying. My ego-self raised every defense to keep me from going there. Eventually, I could avoid it no longer.
My life at this point had endured tremendous change in the course of only a few years- so much so, that the entire landscape of my existence and the people in it were now different. While many of the changes were positive, the magnitude of the differences between my ‘old life’ and my ‘new life’ forced me into robust self-reflection.
Where did I want to go with my life? What did I want to do? And who was I going to be? I must admit, these were heavy questions, and I absolutely felt the weight of them. In addition, I was healing from a personal loss, and that was taking more time than I wanted it to.
My ‘aha moment’ came when I was lamenting one day about my relationship with my partner. I had identified that I wanted a deeper level of connection, but felt that he was unwilling to meet me there.