toxic relationship
The Wisdom Of Forgiveness With Healthy Boundaries
We all have experienced the unease of feeling unable to forgive someone who has wronged us in some way. Sometimes it is really hard to let go of the way someone has gossiped about us, for example. It is difficult to understand why some people have the need to act the way they do, especially when these people are directly or indirectly related to us. Some families just split up and have nothing more to do with each other, because of this lack of forgiveness.
I was meditating on this one night before bed, and asked the Great Spirit to give me deeper insight and understanding on forgiveness. I had consciously made the healing decision for myself, that I will no longer share and keep space open for those who continue to do the same things to me, over and over, because it is unhealthy for me. But, I still felt the need to forgive. And I needed insight on how to do this.
The Man Who Pushed Me Off A Cliff
Since I was a child, I have had fragmented memories of my past lives. These flashbacks are all parts of those lives and lessons that pertain to my soul growth and karma in this lifetime. So far, all of my past life memories have had to do with someone I have interacted with here, in my current incarnation. In other words, I have met all of the people in my past life memories in this lifetime also.
One such memory of a past life, is of a man I was married to in Ireland. We were quite young. I would say no more than 20. We were poor and lived in a little cottage, near a cliff overlooking the ocean. It was a modest, but breathtakingly beautiful home and land. I also remember that I had long, curly red hair.
Sadly, my husband in that lifetime was physically and emotionally abusive. He was always worried that men would desire me and take me away from him. But I had never been with any man but him. I didn’t want to be with my husband, but I certainly didn’t want another man to control and own me either.
How To Have A More Peaceful, Contented Life
Wouldn’t it be nice if life was always easy and we didn’t have to deal with any stress and arguments between loved ones. Imagine a world where everyone got along really well, where everybody was happy and content, and there was no struggle, so that the short while we all were on this planet could just be enjoyable!
I decided to ask my spirit guide what we could all be more aware of in order to have greater peace, contentment and joy in our lives. The response somewhat surprised me.
“Sleep,” said Spirit. Adequate sleep is one vital thing most humans on this planet are no longer getting enough of. If everyone had proper sleep habits, everybody would get along much better. I then asked how could we get better sleep, as most people work, have families to take care of, and many other responsibilities. And spirit said it has to be a conscious choice and a habitual routine. To improve our sleep our priorities have to change.
How To Deal With Toxic People
At times most of us have to deal with toxic people. It seems these days they are popping up everywhere in some way, shape or form. We do our best to understand them. And often we make excuses for why we continue to tolerate them. Year after year.
Fact is, some folks just aren’t going to change. No matter how much patience we give them. We may make up excuses for why we continue to share and hold space for them. But it is in vain.
Sometimes it takes a wake-up call from a doctor who tells us we suffer from stress-related illness, such as high blood pressure or anxiety, to make us realize that dis-ease does in fact cause disease.
I have done readings for several women who have told me they have serious health issues and they believe it is caused from the stress they have to endure from co-workers, or the people they have to live with, or those whom they are married to.
I have given lots of helpful advice to my clients in these matters, but I decided to step it up a notch and spend a month connecting with spirit and asking for a good list of items I can share in this blog that could maybe help you too.
Releasing A Toxic Relationship
Many of us have held onto a toxic relationship (which includes friendships) because of our mind trying to convince us that it will change. It will get better. I can fix this other person. I will wait for this other person to realize what they have in me. This person is my soulmate, I know it. This person is the only one, there will never be another.
So many excuses, so little truth.
It will not change. If a relationship or a friendship is toxic today, yes, it will change and become more toxic as the days, weeks and months pass.
It will not get better. You are trying to convince yourself it will get better with time with someone, when they finally start to realize that you are there no matter what. This is a huge misconception. Toxic relationships cannot change and the loss will be harder the longer you hold onto this person.
You cannot ‘fix’ your partner. No one can fix another person. No one can change another person. Each individual has to do their own work to clear the toxic or damaged parts of themselves. They have to do it for themselves, or it will never last.
Choose Your Life Partner Wisely
Many people are looking for that soulmate who will truly be a life-long partner. But because they are so desperate to find that special person, they sometimes align with those that do not necessarily have all the qualities that are important in a healthy, fulfilling relationship. This is unfortunately not how you find your ‘forever.’
In the old days divorce was not even something someone considered once they got married. Neither did couples live together, unless they were married. It was frowned upon when a baby was born out of wedlock. If someone did get pregnant, there was usually a quick wedding, and that was that.
Tarot Cards And Toxic Relationships
If intuition is the foundation for being a psychic, then divination tools are like putting on glasses to see the details. Tarot cards can reveal a person’s real intentions and provide a bigger picture into any situation that requires clarity.
When I use the Tarot for a love or relationship reading, I look for specific cards or combinations that show harmony or growth within the relationship or person. Here is a list of cards that typically catch my eye as major red flags, or signal that the connection between two people may be toxic.
The Magician
This card can be positive when surrounded by complimentary cards, but it can indicate that the person you’re interested may be charming… but manipulative. I often see this show up when someone only wants to do what they want, or when they want to be with multiple people. Continue reading