the other side
Grandma’s Love Was The Best
I remember what Grandma was wearing when she passed away. I also recall exactly what she said and everything else that happened that day, right down to the violets I picked in the backyard to place in her hand. She was wearing an oversized Winnie the Pooh T-shirt that could have been a night dress, I’m not sure. She had her red robe on and black slippers lined with greyish fluff.
She was told she was being taken to the nursing home, but it was actually hospice she would be going to. She could no longer walk and had fallen, and no one was able to pick her up. Not even myself. I wish I could, but I just was not able to.
I sensed she wasn’t to going be with us very much, and I was very upset about it. But constantly having to give her blood transfusions and her being in so much pain, it was the right decision at the time. I have made peace with that now.
Settling her into the hospice, Grandma was adamant the bed be taken out, as it was unbearably uncomfortable. She kept saying, “I just want to go home and die. This is no way to live. I’m ready to go.” She also told me, if I ever needed her after she had gone, all I would have to do is call her name, and she would be there for me. Grandma kept her promise to me. To this day I still feel her around me all the time, especially when I think of her and call her name.
I think the worst thing I ever experienced in my entire life was walking into that hospice room after she had passed and seeing her shell of a body. She was no longer there, obviously, but she was still around. I felt she was somewhere in the room looking at us and saying her goodbyes.
Pain had made her very bitter towards the end of her life. She wasn’t herself anymore because she was on so many different strong medications and invasive treatments. I sensed that she longed to be with her departed husband and her dear mother who passed when she was just a young girl. Her mom was also a psychic and apparently really good with things like Numerology and dreaming lucky numbers. I loved hearing all those stories.
Honoring Our Fathers And Forefathers
In our youth we easily forget to honor those fathers and father-figures who love and guide us. As we grow older, and hopefully wiser, some of us begin to realize that our fathers are the unsung heroes we never appreciated much. If we are one of the lucky ones, they were our champions growing up.
Always stalwart and steady, no matter what was going on around them or preying on their minds. How often must they have ended their day wondering whether they were doing enough for their families and what the future might hold?
After the fact, sometimes they openly share the worries, fears and insecurities that became all too real in times of crisis, but these challenges were carefully hidden from us, so as not to frighten us.
For those of us who have fathers who fought in wars for our freedom, we owe a great debt of gratitude. These courageous men who may have been terrified in the face of grave danger, fought bravely for their beliefs and the safety of their families. Many were lost or injured. Most returned home, greatly changed. And yet, we rarely heard about the realities of war, or their sacrifices.
Striking a balance between strength and vulnerability is a never-ending work in progress. Blessed is the man who finds his equilibrium with a calm, cool demeanor in the midst of the chaos that surrounds them. Blessed also are the children who call him “Dad.”
To the men who have acted as leaders and mentors to many protégés, perhaps without even knowing it, a great deal is owed. Whether it has been through leadership in business, teaching in schools, or volunteering in communities, many have no idea how deeply they have affected those whose lives they have touched, even peripherally.
Making The Most Of This Life, In This World!
I remember watching with fascination Sliding Doors starring Gwyneth Paltrow. In this film she finds herself in two parallel worlds with two very different realities that result from her choices and decisions.
Seeing this film prompted me to explore the fascinating subject of parallel worlds. According to physics, the existence of parallel worlds or a multiverse is a genuine possibility.
A parallel world is believed to be another world that exists alongside this one, yet it is undetectable to and independent of this world. It has also been suggested that another version of you could exist in one of these alternate realities, while there may other parallel worlds where you do not exist at all.
Could it be that each choice or decision we make in this world creates a very different reality in another world? For example, in another world, instead of going to your high school prom back in 1980, where you fell in love with Frank and later married him; you didn’t go to the prom that night, Frank never existed, and you ended up never getting married.
There are various schools of thought that this Universe is not singular – but one of many. One theory is that the Universe in which we live is infinite. However, matter can only rearrange itself up to a finite point and then it has to start repeating itself, thus creating Universe after Universe.
Another viewpoint is that there are multiple universes that all contain a planet Earth and more doppelgänger replicas of you! Furthermore, in these other worlds, you have to make different decisions – just like Gwyneth Paltrow has to decide in Sliding Doors if she is going to get on the train, or not, leading to different outcomes in each parallel life.
Some physicists theorize that the Big Bang, which may have given rise to the birth of the Universe, was not a one-off event. It may have prompted other Big Bangs giving birth to other Universes.
The Mysterious Man In The Back Yard
I remember coming out the back door, with a Kellogg’s Pop-Tart in one hand and a seven ounces bottle of 7Up in the other. It was July 13th. It was dad’s birthday and I had to be about nine years old at the time.
The family spent the day at my grandparents’ house to celebrate. More and more guests were showing up, until all the aunts, uncles and cousins were crowding together in the very small back yard.
I then noticed this mysterious man who I had never seen before. He was wearing a trench coat and he had a long beard. I remember thinking that he looked funny to me. I asked my mother who the man was, but when she turned around he was gone.
Later that night, I saw the same apparition again. It happened twice, and every time I saw him he was looking at me in a strange way. My grandparents became curious and asked me about this man I kept seeing. I described him and they seemed shocked.
My grandmother went to get a photo album and showed me an old picture. She asked me if that was the man I had seen and I immediately recognized him. My grandfather then told me that it was his uncle and that he died by falling off a cliff. Foul play was suspected, but nobody knew who might have pushed him or caused his accident.
Later that week, we took our bikes to cycle around a nearby hill. My older brother Mike was riding his bicycle down the hill and he suddenly hit a loose rock really hard. It blew out his front tire and was going very fast, but he was not seriously injured.